Post # 1
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
Yesterday I got a call from my FH….saying….”seriously Wedding Cakes are a waste of money, no one usually gets any cake, its boring to watch the couple and cut the cake, and I’m just not really into the idea of a cake-this is not a birthday its our wedding!” So my initial reaction was like. “how can we not have a wedding cake?”
But more and more I think about it, I think he right. I can spend that money towards a lavish dessert spread full of cakes, pastries etc. etc. instead of an overpriced cake that we cut, while people chatter amongst each other, waiting for us to finish up so they can eat and dance.
What do you guys think? Is it really that necessary? Wouldn’t you rather have a dessert spread?
Post # 3
Member
27 posts
Newbee
I’m making my wedding cake…because I usually hate the cake that is served! I have been decorating cakes for years, so I am excited to make mine. However, a dessert spread would make me very excited for dessert!!!!! I think, like so many other wedding "must haves", the wedding cake portion is over the top. I keep reminding myself this is for us, and if your Fiance doesn’t want the cake…I think you have a perfect alternative!
Post # 4
Member
402 posts
Helper bee
whatever you want! its your day.
i agree with the rational here. i’m not extremely attached to a wedding cake either but will probably have one to appease my mother (thus she should pay fo rit, right?)
i think the tradition of the toast and cake cutting/feeding has something to do with symbolism of taking the bitter and sweet of life together.
this could be symbolized in other ways if you wanted to.
the dessert spread would be cool too. and who says you still cant feed each other dessert?
Post # 5
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
i don’t know.. i always love wedding cakes; well any cake in general and felt this was the best part of a wedding! hehe. im rushing through dinner just to get that slice of that cake.. yumm.. but yeah that could just be me.. a sweet dessert spread sounds good but just doesn’t seem as special.. you can have those sweets any day, but you only have a wedding cake for one day =D which is what makes it all the more special in the first place.. i don’t know.. that’s my two cents. good luck with your choice =)
Post # 6
Member
105 posts
Blushing bee
- Wedding: June 2007 - Bride's family summer home in the Adirondacks
Yeah, we got lucky and had the best cake I’ve EVER had as our wedding cake, so I definitely wouldn’t have wanted to give that up!
BUT – if your fiance really doesn’t want to have one, and you don’t feel strongly about it, I think it’s 10000% fine to not have one! And a dessert spread sounds really really yummy and I seriously doubt anyone will miss the cake. Also, like GetMarried4Less said – you can always cut a cupcake or a tart or whatever and feed each other a little piece of SOMETHING if you want to stick with the tradition that way!
Post # 7
Member
117 posts
Blushing bee
- Wedding: May 2008 - United Methodist Cathedral & historic downtown hotel in Cleveland
Hey, I’m with you- and we’re not having cake! (I don’t like cake, Mr. D doesn’t really like cake, and the whole thing just strikes me as silly.)
We’re having creme brulee, and will also have a smallish dessert spread.
Post # 8
Member
191 posts
Blushing bee
i’m doing cupcakes – 2 different flavors!
one of my friends is a fabulous baker.
she’s making 300 cupcakes!
Post # 9
Member
106 posts
Blushing bee
I’m with you about the money being spent.
Therefore, I’m RENTING MY CAKE. Yup! You can rent from different peeps online or locally. I’m doing it locally at http://www.fakethecake.com or you can try http://www.cakerental.com/ –the latter makes AMAZING cakes to rent and she’ll ship’em to you.
Post # 10
Member
45 posts
Newbee
I definitely agree. I think big extravagant wedding cakes are overrated, and they contribute to the thought that your wedding budget needs to increase by $500… for cake! Maybe you can do something similar to what we are doing (if you want to save the money entirely).
We are having his sister make us a cake that is 10" in diameter and about 5" high. We’re putting it on a fancy plate, cutting it (like usual), and the wedding party/family is eating it. Then we’re also having her make us two sheet cakes for the guests. This way, the guests can be served right after we are done cutting. It’s going to cost us about $40 for materials and it’s his sister’s gift to us 🙂 FYI, our wedding guestlist is only 100 people and our bridal party is 4 total (including us). If your wedding is very large, this might not work.
Post # 11
Member
1458 posts
Bumble bee
I guess I never thought about it. Either way I’m dropping a bunch of money on desert – and I don’t know how "no one" gets cake at a wedding – it;s not like they order 50 piece cake for a 400 guest wedding, I’ve always gotten cake and never had to actually watch the couple cut the cake. I didn’t realize you were supposed to do this in front of everyone, when I’ve gone it’s just been done with the couple and the photogo off to the side, and then magically theres cake in front of me 🙂
I think it could be cool either way! And fun to pick other stuff. I already put a down payment on our cake…otherwise I might look in to this alternative just to add some fun.
Post # 12
Member
32 posts
Newbee
we’re doing a cupcake tower – much cheaper and putting money into a dessert buffet!
At my cousin’s wedding this past summer, they didn’t have a cake either and I don’t think many people noticed! We were focused on the chocolate fondue and popcorn machine!
Post # 13
Member
754 posts
Busy bee
We are getting our cake at a local cafe/bakery. They call it "The Wedding Cake" and it is a tasty strawberries and cream cake. It will cost a fraction of the price of a normal wedding cake, and I take comfort in knowing I won’t be vomiting fondant all night!
Post # 14
Member
36 posts
Newbee
I agree. If you’re not a fan of cake, why have it? (On the other hand, if you love cake, I think it’s a perfect time to go all out.) I’ve been lobbying for a wedding brownie since we started planning. 
Post # 15
Member
25 posts
Newbee
I love all things sweet, so I’m not one to discriminate against cake
. We are going to have a cake, but will be serving smaller portions, because we want to serve it with Graeter’s (a hometown favorite ice cream), and will also have a candy bar buffet so that there’s something for everyone. That said, don’t have cake if you don’t want cake, you wouldn’t wear a wedding dress you weren’t crazy about so why serve a dessert you aren’t crazy about either!
Post # 16
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
Neither Fiance or I really like cake at all, so we are having homemade apple pie from a family friend’s orchard and vanilla ice cream. We are also having homemade chocolate chip cookies, which are kind of my signature party dessert.
Do what makes you happy. If you and your Fiance like cream puffs, have those. If you like cheesecake, have that. I look at it as another little place we can make our wedding, well, ours.
Good luck!
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