Post # 1
i am planning my jan ’09 wedding and i briefly mentioned to my contact at my reception hall that i was considering hiring a DOC. she responded with the following:
"we will have a Matre D, captain (helps over see staff, porter (doeas allt he set up, bridal attendant (there for you the entire evening for anythign you need). i will also be on site until you are announced in to the ballroom after cocktail hour to make sure everything is set up the way you asked. i don’t thik it is necessary to spend the extra money on a DOC unless you think you really want one"
i haven’t planned a wedding before but i am unsure how to proceed. my wedding is in ny and i am planning from europe. so far i have done all the vendor research myself since i am not working full time here. i plan on visiting ny once this summer before the wedding but i won’t get back again until 3 weeks before the actual date.
any advice on how to handle this? should i go it alone and maybe have friend or family member assist if i need it or should i hire someone?
Post # 3
Well, that is very nice of her. But what about picking out and designing a cake, choosing a DJ/band, who will do your hair, The invitations, the flowers, what flowers do you want, what favors and centerpieces, and all the details of the ceremony? I don’t have a DOC, but don’t they also help with contacts and arranging all of these things?
Like I said, I don’t have one. But I am not planning from overseas and it does not fit in my budget. If it would fit in your budget, I would do it if I were you, especially from overseas. Good luck
Post # 4
I don’t think DOCs typically help with choosing cakes, bands, hair, invitations, etc, that’s usally for a full wedding coordinator. This is just me gathering this info from reading coordinator packages (I’m on the hunt!). A DOC, from what I’ve read, basically is doing exactly what your reception hall is providing. Making sure you’re where you’re supposed to be at such time, intercepting problems and fixing them before they reach you. From the info you received, I think the only thing you would need a DOC for is perhaps setting up programs, favors, but you’d have to check with your caterer if they already include this.
Post # 5
You might want to drill this lady a little more. Does the porter really do all the set up? Is there a time limit on anyone? (I know she said "all evening", but does that mean 4 hours? 5 hours?) Get the details in writing first, then you can maneuver.
I have a wedding coordinator because I am planning from out of state. She has been very helpful with finding vendors and helping me with my "vision". Many coordinators have packages with different levels. Maybe you could get a package where she just helps you find vendors but doesn’t work on the actual day of the wedding. Good luck!
Post # 6
does she also coordinate all of the vendors? what would she do if a "wedding crisis" came up? i think you need to interview her just like you would interview a DOC and then make your decision.
Post # 7
I did not have a DOC but did have a maitre d and Bridal attendant with me all day. They were fantastically wonderful and I may be biased, but I feel a DOC is not necessary. I provided my entire bridal party with all the contacts of my vendors and gave them a timeline which included when the vendors were due to arrive and I let them handle any hiccups from there one. Personally, I feel that if your Bridal party is fully aware of what’s going on and you have a good maitre d and bridal attendant, you’ve got nothing to worry about….I could go on and on about this, but if you want more info on how my day went for my wedding in NYC, you can email me at [email protected]
Post # 8
I decided to have a DOC mostly for the work that she does prior to the wedding. She confirms with all vendors prior to the wedding, helps with the wedding day timeline, and she is helping at the rehersal. My DOC has also given me wonderful recommendations for florists, DJs, and photographers.
I also do NOT want my family to have to deal with any problems or issues that arise on my wedding day. My family is coming from out of town for the wedding and I want them to feel like the honored guests that they are, not like they are my gophers or problem solvers. For me, the help was worth the money, especially since I should be able to work a couple more days before the wedding than I would be able to otherwise.
Post # 9
Here’s a blog post about the difference from one of the blogs I stalk. It refers to a full on wedding planner instead of a day-of, but it has a few good points. Disclaimer…I’m biased.
Post # 10
my advice is to hire a coordinator! it is well worth the money and since you’re planning from across the pond, i think you would feel more secure having someone hold your hand through the process…
good luck and happy planning!
Post # 11
I don’t think anything is necessary in a wedding outside of a significant other and someone to solemnize the wedding (the legal part of it).
With that said, it is REALLY helpful to have one if you can afford it but absolutely not necessary. If your venue is a hotel then it may not be necessary. If you are renting an empty space and there are 10 million vendors coming in at different times with 20 million rules governing everything, it is an excellent idea. So many things can go wrong with the latter situation.
Think about the size of your wedding and whether you can see complications arising.
I would highly recommend that you have one if you can afford it. It is nice to have someone solidify a timeline for you and to keep everyone on schedule. If there’s a problem, they’ll fix it so you won’t have to hear about it (unless it’s really bad).
Realize this, however; a DOC will only take you on under her wing at most a month out before the wedding. She will arrange a final timeline, verify all orders and specific details with vendors and confirm load-in/load-out times in addition to the day-of work. If you are looking for "hand holding" you may want to look into a partial coordinator or a full coordinator. Let me know if you have any questions!
Post # 12
My DJ is my director of ceremonies. I am planning the wedding myself. Not about to pay someone to plan my wedding.
Post # 13
Like the other people have said, it depends on your wedding. Are you going to have a bunch of DIY stuff and will the porter set that sort of stuff up? Have they worked with your florist/cake person/DJ/etc before and will they be willing to call the vendors if they don’t show up on time or things are wrong? What if something is wrong with your flowers, for example?
Is your ceremony off-site? Do you have stuff that needs to be set up and broken down there? Stuff to be transported to the reception site?
If something goes wrong at the reception, do they know your tastes and what’s important to you well enough to guess what you would want them to do or are they going to be coming up to you and asking you a million questions. Or change things in ways you don’t like.
So it depends on your situation, what they are prepared to do, and how picky you are, I suppose.
Post # 14
I hired a DOC for my summer 08 wedding and I already feel that my stress level has gone down. I felt that I needed to hire someone to take care of the "business" (vendors) and make sure that all of the little details that I am spending so much time planning will actually be taken care of on the day of. I can’t imagine having my family and friends "working" on the wedding day. You want people to relax and have a good time and not have to think about what time it is and whether the DJ is going to show up or whether the rose petals have been laid down before the ceremony. At the end of the day, paying someone $1000 which is only 1/50th of my wedding costs is going to be well worth it.
Post # 15
caliocteach, i don’t think having a wedding planner means that you don’t plan your own wedding. my wedding planner basically does all my b*tch work, things like dumping potential vendors, scouting out new vendors, finding random things online, answering questions about wedding etiquette and things, etc. i’m planning the entire event, she’s supporting my plans.
Post # 16
Hehe, if a $1000 was 1/50th of my wedding costs, I’d probably have a DOC too!