Post # 1
So, I hope to make this fairly quick…bear with me! I really need some advice here.
When my fiancé proposed to me this passed Valentine’s Day I was so excited to begin planning the wedding I had always dreamed about ..since I was like 8! I could hardly contain myself. SO much has happened in the last 8-9 months that all the potential planning has come to a full stop and the date we originally wanted has been changed several times, resulting in NO DATE at this point. (Because of financial problems).
Last weekend, my mother, a close family friend, myself, my brother and my fiance and I sat at the dining room table and talked about dates. I put 3 different dates that we were throwing around on paper, folded them up and put them in a bowl. I mixed them up a bit and had my brother pick one. Everyone shot the date down immediately. I had him pick again. Same thing happened. So we ended up with that 3rd date simply by default and when I read it outloud, it just didn’t tickle me. Where was that Wedding Date Magic?? I read a few articles here and there about choosing your date.. whether by symbolism, season, price, etc. But .. i guess you kind of have to have a style or theme in mind and that will help you decide? Unfortunately because of the rollercoaster ride i’ve been on for the last 9 months I am just short of running off to vegas and eloping just to get it over with (and believe me every time I think of that plan I want to cry because all I really want is a beautiful wedding with the people I love there to celebrate it).
Did anyone else go through these wedding date woes?? I feel like the date should speak to me, but lately because of things that’ve been going on, i just feel like the whole wedding is a hoax and it’ll never happen. Running the risk of sounding like a spoiled child? I fee like stamping my feet and running off to hide somewhere. Nothing seems to be “speaking to me” lately when it comes to wedding stuff. I’m finding all of it very frustrating and that is mostly because I want what I cannot have or afford. What is the cure?!?!
All of this is made a little worse because my fiance tends to feel my pain and he feels bad that he can’t just give me what I want.
I dont want to be a bridezilla, but i’m starting to feel like one and we don’t even have a date yet!
Post # 3
WHy do you not like the third date? Are there negative memories associated with it? Is it not as soon as you’d like? You can make a beautiful wedding with any date!
Post # 4
Our wedding date is probably the most important thing to us so I would be completely devastated if we didn’t get to go through with it. With that said, I feel you should do what you want. Are your parents paying for the wedding? I ask because if someone objected to our date (they have actually) it wouldn’t change my mind at all…”Sorry you can’t make it. We will miss you.” but again, I would have a super small non fabulous wedding if that’s all I could get for that date.
As for things not speaking to you, forcing it won’t help at all. I’ve experienced the “Nothing is speaking to me” feeling and I just had to put it on the back burner until something did. I had to wait months until I figured out what I wanted for the cake and now I’m stuck on what to decorate the bottom layer with.
Post # 5
I wouldnt think to much into it. ITs not a memorable date until you make it one. Just stick to it and start planning chica!!!!
Post # 6
What’s the date? Maybe we can find some cool stuff about it that will change your mind. Ha! 🙂
If this is really true: “all I really want is a beautiful wedding with the people I love there to celebrate it,” then you’ll come around, once you see if that is the date that works the best to have all the people you love there.
Post # 7
We picked our date because it was available and when we have time! I think that the magic of the date is what happens on the date not what a psychic or calendar says about the date!
Post # 8
We picked our date with no thought in terms of significance. We wanted early summer, we needed a date after FI’s school year was over (he’s a teacher), and after prom, HS, and college graduation (for various BMs and GMs). The date means absolutely nothing to us or anything else.
Honestly (and this convo has been had before) the only date I wouldn’t have would be a major holiday (Christmas/Thanksgiving/etc) or September 11 (just because I’m from NY and that date has too many negative connotations)
Post # 9
We picked our date because it was the only date in 2009 our venue had available. No significane or anything else. YOU make the day special, not the date ;o)
Post # 10
We picked ours based on scheduling – I wanted to be home for the 4th of July, but didn’t want my family to have a wedding on that weekend. So, next weekend!
i really think the date is the less important factor. It’s a date. Once you have your wedding on that date, though, then it matters – and you won’t really care about the numbers.
Post # 11
I agree that you make the date special. We knew we wanted a spring wedding so we wanted to go with the month of April if all possible. Since I am getting married in Augsuta, we had to plan around the Masters Golf Tournament. It could not the weekend before or the weekend of the tournament because all of his family is from Out of Town and the hotel prices are sky high during those weekends. Our date is the following weekend because our venue was available then and the hotel room prices will be drastically lower. There was not any magic until the planning really started, and now I could not imagine another date. I think you will love your date, no matter when it is because it is your special day. 🙂
Post # 12
Confession: I don’t like my date. It’s the only practical date for us, just doesn’t have that ring to it for. I don’t know what to tell you, just wanted to commiserate!
Post # 13
We picked our date because it’s distant from other gift-giving dates so gifts will be given evenly throughout the year, and because my parents approved of it as being “a good day to get married.” Lol!
Post # 14
All of the advice here is so true – you will make the day special no matter what the date it is 🙂
We’ve gone through some wedding date woes as well…we are on the third date and I am happy to say this one isn’t changing.
Post # 15
I know I’ll have to take into consideration school holidays as my dad is a teacher. I’m not allowed June apparently (EVERYBODY’S birthday/anniversary seems to be in june in our family) and to have it around Christmas would be somewhat hectic. I would like it to be as close to our anniversary as we can get in 2011. We want a church wedding and it is ‘easter saturday’ :S I may need to get thinking on that one.
Post # 16
- Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School
I picked mine sort of randomly, with no significance, which I think is way more common…It’s nice to be able to imply some significance to the date but so not necessary and oftentimes, really really difficult!