- 9 years ago
- Wedding: May 2010
HI,My story does go back a couple of yeas as that is how long i have now been married for and still today it pains me with what happend in the events leading up to my Wedding day and the day its self, even when i write this i feel terrible emotional!.
I come from a large family one of big traditions and where everyone gathers at events, we are all quite close especially when we where younger my cousins and I where like bothers and sisters to me. It all started at a cousins christening event that a petty dispute came out against my own sister that she said something about someone else ( which she did not as i was sitting on the same table and could hear the conversations) we where pretty much blanked anyways at the christening, however the two cousin in question spread rumours around the whole family against my sister and this was just a couple of months before my wedding, these individuals have always had a very jealous character about them and it wouldn’t be the first they have tried to attack verbally about my family.
Leading up to the wedding the dispute became centre of attention and caused a huge rifted between my family and my aunties family of which it blew out of proportion to the point they did not reply whether they wanted to come to the wedding, i could see my mum very hurt by this, i also saw facebook message from cousins gossiping and in a very emotional state i deleted people off facebook, now i know this would not have helped but it was my wedding, this was supposed to be a happy time for me i did not want to see all this BulSh*t. It got worse ( possibly through my actions) as we did not know whether people where coming or not, I also got extremely hurt that i had only found out a couple of days before my wedding day that my page boy ( he was 3) was not coming, his mother, my cousin, did not have the decency to call me to tell me she was not coming and this was after i had already paid for his page boy suit and a gift for all my bridesmaids and pageboys! i had to instead find out from a third party that they where not coming!! please is it just me or does anyone else think this is discusting! who does this to people.
The cousin who started all the disputes said in the end that she was sorry and that she was coming to the wedding however the other family ( my auntie) said they would not come as their daughter in law was having her baby which was a suzerain section and apparently the whole family needed to be there ( because hospitals let a whole family in the operating room mmm) not one of they could of said i will go on behalf of the family … NOT ONE!
Anyway the day came and it was a beautiful day the sun was out it was a very hot day my friends where all happy and it was wonderful, however it was noticed that none of my cousins bothered to turn up even the cousin who said sorry did not turn up, ( now remember at a wedding dinner you have already paid per head for these people to be there and its not cheap these days) anyway’s they did not bother to come and i noticed it on the day, my aunties all arrived late during the church service and even when they came up to speak to me they where making excuses as to why the rest of their family where not there! I just didn’t want to know. They where also gossiping during my wedding.
Why is it that when a happy occasion comes up you always get people who are so selfish and just think about them selfs instead of think ..i will hold my tongue until after the wedding as its their turn to get married and its a happy occasion.. No instead they have to use your wedding as an excuse to hurt family members.
Still today my family seem to be the centre of gossip as after my Wedding there where a few family events of which we did not go to as we felt so hurt however all my cousins made it to all the other weddings that followed mine even the cousins wedding that was the instigator of all this dispute… so how do you think this makes me feel..
I have not seen any of them since, i feel even resentment against my nan as she is a huge gossiper and seems to never surppot us and always think my family are the outcast! I try to let this go and forgive but it is so hard, maybe writing about it is the first step although i had to try sum a series of events in one blog. i have even had dreams about seeing them and telling them what i think and having i out.. i need to let this go
What you you think? any words of encouragement to help let this go or has anyone had a simlar expireience?