(Closed) Wedding destination – yes or no?

posted 4 years ago in Destination Weddings
  • poll: Should I opt for a destination wedding in the Caribbean or have my wedding locally?

    Destination wedding - however customising and coordinating the wedding as per wishes can be tricky

    Destination weddings without a doubt

    Local - It is easy and I can coordinate it all easily

    Indifferent

  • Post # 2
    Member
    7901 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    Before you worry about all the details–are you paying for your guests to travel to the Caribbean? If not, do you think they will want to spend thousands of dollars to be at your wedding? 

    Post # 3
    Member
    2363 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2018

    I always vote no for destination weddings, pushes the cost onto the guests. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    4767 posts
    Honey bee

    When given the option I will always say no unless you are eloping with no guests or you have no local guests and everyone would be forced to travel regardless.  I am not a fan of pushing the costs off on guests for them to take a “vacation” to a destination not of their choosing or at their convenience.  And in the U.S. at least most of us get precious little vacation time off work as it is.  

    If you are going to go the destination route, have thick skin and be okay with people (including close family and friends) declining due to cost, lack of vacation time, etc. And if you have VIPs you cannot picture your wedding without, you should be floating by potential costs and dates by them to see if it even feasible.

    Post # 5
    Member
    515 posts
    Busy bee

    if you can avoid a Destination Wedding, please do!! so expensive for the guests and especially bridal party.

    i feel like i’ve seen the avg couple pay about 1k to attend one.

    i wish i could tell my guests, “I’m NOT having a Destination Wedding. Feel free to give me a 1k gift anyway!” Kidding.. mostly.. hehehehe

    Post # 6
    Member
    4835 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    View original reply
    tashapaz :  I think the main factor you should consider when deciding on a Destination Wedding is your guest list.  Are your guests intersted in traveling?  Would they have to travel anyhow (as in, do you live far away from your famliy & friends)?  Is there a large group of people who really needs to be there?  Do your group have the disposable income and extra time to travel?

    I’d answer that question first.  If the answer is yes, then I’d move onto the question of esthetics.  I’d say that it’s going to be harder to execute a specific vision at a Destination Wedding (unless that vision is Caribean beach party, that will be really easy!).  If that’s a big consideration for you I’d keep things at home where you can have more control of vendors and can do more DIY (if that’s your thing).  

    I had a Destination Wedding and I am really happy with the decision.  However, part of the value proposition for me was that it gave me a way to oursource so much of the esthetics.  I really wasn’t interested in spending a lot of time on that and didn’t have a really specific vision.  I did a lot of telling the resort, “what do you recomend?  Ok, that sounds great.”

    Post # 7
    Member
    38 posts
    Newbee

    We are having a “destination” wedding in the sense that it isn’t local. We are in Virgina and doing our wedding in Florida in February – getting away from the cold for a few days. We are having about 50 people attend which I think is great. We picked our local based on how quick the flight was and prices for the flight. If you don’t mind having a smaller turnout, and you think your close friends and family are down for a getaway, I say go for it. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    1593 posts
    Bumble bee

    You can customize a wedding anywhere in the world. There are planners and florists who will go anywhere in the world for you. But they cost a lot of money. If I were you, I’d just do your wedding locally and go on your honeymoon to the Carribean. What reasons has your fiance given for wanting to do a destination wedding?

    Post # 9
    Member
    84 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    Hi, bee! Congratulation on your engagement! Can I ask if there’s any reason you’re considering a destination wedding in the Carribean? My situation might be different than yours, but my fiance and I are having a destination wedding really mainly because we’re from different countries and there is really no “middle” of both of our countries. And we do not want to have two different weddings in each country, so decided to have a Destination Wedding in a country where we live now (we live in overseas!), it’ll be at a different state, so everybody including us has never been there! It’ll be a lot of fun, I hope. Our wedding is a small, intimate family only wedding, and both of our families sort of met in the middle for us. I’m a type of person who LOVES organizing and planning everything in advance, so I never thought I’d have a Destination Wedding. My fiance knows me so well, so he suggested what if we have a wedding planner. We ended up finding a perfect venue that included wedding coordinators to their package, and that is what exactly we went for! Just be aware that not everybody would come to your wedding. We’re fully aware of that ever since we decided to have a Destination Wedding. One of my fiance’s brothers and his wife can’t come because just the timing won’t work for them. Also kiddos won’t come because of the schools. I realized more and more that it’s impossible to please everyone. So if you have a reason to have a Destination Wedding in the Carribean whether that’s because it’s a special place for you and your fiance or you simply adore the place, then I’d say go for it & have a wedding planner to help you. Planning a wedding is already stressful, so I’d avoid adding any extras. If that’s not the case, having a local wedding won’t hurt and still very lovely. I wish we could do it, but it is what it is when you live in overseas. Good luck!!! 

    Post # 10
    Member
    24 posts
    Newbee

    Is there a reason why you want the wedding there and can’t just honeymoon there? 

    Post # 11
    Member
    3848 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    View original reply
    tashapaz :  I voted local, thinking of your guests.  DWs are very costly for guests, and take vacation time some of them might prefer to use elsewhere, or at another time.

    Enjoy your honeymoon there!!  🙂

    Post # 12
    Member
    7806 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    A few things to keep in mind:

    -DW are expensive for your guests

    -DW require a lot of time off for your guests

    -DW in caribbean could be in zika areas, and youd be asking friends & fam to make a really shitty choice

    Post # 13
    Member
    429 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    I’m having a Destination Wedding. We are doing destination because our families would have to travel anyway. We live in NYC but his family is from other states. My immediate family is in NYC as I was born and raised here but the rest of my family lives in the South. So being that most of our guests would have to travel and my family likes to travel we decided to do destination.

    Regarding getting your dream wedding, you can definitely have that in the Caribbean. I chose a package to start with and then made several upgrades and add-ons to customize it.

    Just weight the pros and cons to make your decision. Good Luck!

    Post # 14
    Member
    5966 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I would be more concerned about the attendance of VIPs. If they couldn’t make a destination wedding, it would be a hard no for me.

    If they can make it or you don’t particularly care, go for a destination wedding. I would imagine that a Destination Wedding can be just as custom as a local wedding, you just might require the help of a planner.

    Post # 15
    Member
    13555 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    It’s not a Destination Wedding if it’s local to the couple or one of their families. I don’t buy the excuse that people would have to travel anyway, certainly not for a multi day event at a non-domestic location. When the wedding is convenient to no one it almost always puts venue ahead of people. It requires unreasonable financial ecpense and asks people to take your vacation instead of one they would have planned instead.

    The exception might be a close knit immediate family that plans something like this together or an eloping couple. Otherwise, DWs are rarely considerate to guests. 

    In your place I’d get married at home and take a Caribbean honeymoon. If you can’t afford to do both, downsize the wedding or delay or scale down the honeymoon. 

    Before anyone chimes in to say no one is obligated to attend a Destination Wedding, I think that is short sighted. Weddings are once in a lifetime, hopefully. Many people will sacrifice beyond what is reasonable to be there. 

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