(Closed) Wedding Donations Instead of Registry

posted 4 years ago in Money
Post # 2
Member
1359 posts
Bumble bee

Please, please don’t do that.

If you don’t wat physical gifts, just don’t register. I promise, people will get the hint.

Post # 3
Member
4008 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

This won’t end well…

Post # 4
Member
671 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Actually Zola has these options under their “experiences” tab. People can gift you $ for flowers, hair, photography. I understand prefering money to objects you don’t need, but I think it helps people to know where the $ is going sometimes. And it is nicer and more polite to give them the option than to straight out ask for $. Also, Zola will let you register for charities. Please make sure you also include actual objects though for your Traditional guests. 

Post # 5
Member
868 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016 - Cherry Orchard

please don’t do this. People shouldn’t be paying for the party you’re inviting them to. 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by  wvkc.
Post # 6
Member
4055 posts
Honey bee

Like PP said, just don’t have a registry. People will gift cash. 

Post # 7
Member
1887 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m sorry, I understand the desire, but I don’t think there’s a good way to do this because it really isn’t done. Asking people to contribute money to the party they’re attending is a bit like a snake eating its own tail.

If I had friends who asked me to contribute to the cost of their wedding in lieu of a gift, I would feel bad about attending, like I was burdening them financially by adding to their numbers. I would also prefer they use any cash I give them toward their future, not flower arrangements, if they were so pressed financially.

Post # 8
Member
492 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

A better bet is to have a wedding you two can afford and just not register. 9 out of 10 guests will give cash if there is no registry.

Post # 9
Member
549 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: Backyard

I’m going to go against the grain (as usual) and say that it probably depends on your guests. I understand that many may see this as tacky, but others may not. I was told on here that having guests help with the food was a horrible idea that I should never consider. When I asked many of the guests though, they thought it was a wonderful idea. (We ended up deciding not to do this because we got a great deal on catering.) My point is…and I’m certain that most will disagree with this…you know your guests. You know whether they would see this as tacky or as a great way to contribute to making your day meaningful. Personally, I would be happy to know that I was able to contribute to a friend’s day rather than buying them more stuff they’ll never use.

Post # 10
Member
3327 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

wow didn’t read carefully. Wtf that’s messed up. Do not ask for donations, that’s basically charging admission. 

Post # 11
Member
1490 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Invite all Chinese people! Our traditional wedding gift is red envelopes with cash inside.  Easy for hosts, easy for guests.  Don’t really get Americans’ bugbear against gifting money for weddings.  

Post # 12
Member
10602 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Keep in mind that basically you are asking people to pre gift you. If you want them to contribute to the wedding that means they would have to give you their gift months in advance to be of any help. It’s just not a good idea.

I would say do a small registry with things you would like to update (bedding, pillows, towels) and leave it at that. You don’t have to put a bunch on it, just a few options for traditional gift givers. Most people will still probably gift you a check or cash or even gift cards. But they will gift you AT the wedding, not months before. 

Post # 13
Member
2359 posts
Buzzing bee

jnd224:

I agree with you. I think it depends on your guests and your circle of friends. I was complainging about the samething. I’m middled aged. I like my dishes. I suppose I could get new sheets…but eh. My cousin suggested that we sign up for some website that allows ppl to pay for, or help pay for a honeymoon(since we cant afford one). My family thought it was a great idea.

bellanurse26:  

 

I totally see where you are coming from. And I’m not sure what I am going to do. I’m in the same boat. But I think most people here will find it horrifying you would suggest such a thing.

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by  .
  • This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by  .
  • This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by  .
Post # 14
Member
6891 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

View original reply
bellanurse26:  Please do not do this.  IF you can not afford a wedding then elope. This is so so tacky and rude to ask people to pay for your wedding 

Post # 15
Member
3298 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

View original reply
bellanurse26:  just sell tickets to your “wedding”.

Just kidding,  asking for donations to fund your wedding is tacky as f◇ck!

 

The topic ‘Wedding Donations Instead of Registry’ is closed to new replies.

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