(Closed) Wedding gift for bride & groom when you are in the wedding party?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll:
    No wedding gift! : (3 votes)
    11 %
    $25 - $49 : (4 votes)
    14 %
    $50 - $75 : (5 votes)
    18 %
    $76 - $100 : (8 votes)
    29 %
    $100+ : (8 votes)
    29 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    692 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    IMO, spending amount is entirely dependant on your relationship to the couple + your personal finances.  So I can’t give much advice there.

    I think if you know them well enough, and take a look at what kinds of things they registered for (lots of cooking gadgets, outdoor-type things, entertainment stuff, etc), you could probably cobble together something that they’d really like.  For a friend’s wedding a few years ago, I put together a ‘date night at home’ basket of snacks and DVDs, since they registered for a lot of board games and other entertainment-at-home things.  Not that cash isn’t a good gift, too, I’m just throwing out suggestions if you feel like being creative.

    Post # 4
    Member
    1193 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    To me my being a part of the bridal party is your gift. Especially if i’ve been involved in the planning of the shower or the bachelorette party

    Post # 5
    Member
    350 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    My Fiance was in a wedding party a couple years ago and we gave $250 from both of us….

    Post # 6
    Member
    12247 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I would be confused if we got a wedding gift from anyone in our wedding party! They’re renting tuxes/buying dresses! They’re doing enough for us already!

    Post # 7
    Member
    1375 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Gifts are completely optional so this is up to you, your beloved if you share accounts (and even if you don’t!) and your finances.  I’ve only given a wedding gift to one couple in whose wedding I’ve participated – most involved travel, bachelorette and shower co-hosting, and one of them had two receptions, on different weekends, in different cities I flew to.

    Post # 8
    Member
    115 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    As a bride, I find it inconceivable that my Bridal Party would plan to buy us gifts, but ironically enough I have ALWAYS wanted to buy gifts for every couple whose wedding I’ve been a part of. I would say that generally, these are my dearest, dearest friends so I find myself wanting to really splurge and go all out on their gifts (when I’ve been in the financial position to do so.) Being a Bridesmaid or Best Man is always an expense. If you have the financial means to do more, that is a lovely idea. I doubt they are “expecting” anything, though.

    Giving to newlyweds is a joy, not an obligation by any means or under any circumstances. (Despite what people say, an invitation to a wedding does not IMo mandate that the guest buy you anything. This is a social norm, but sharing in the occasion is the real point, not gifts.) if you choose to do more for this couple, give what you can & what amount you want. Your dear friends will be greatful that you shared in making their day special no matter what. If you choose to also give a wedding gift, that is just a bonus. Cash is always appreciated, though I much prefer giving a gift.

    I work full time and am 30, so things are a little different now that I’m not fresh out of college, lol! I usually spend around $250-350 on the wedding gifts if I am a Bridesmaid or Best Man. (That’s on top of a shower gift, lingerie, etc. and in addition to whatever I spent on dress, hair, spa days,, bachelorette, showers, etc.) That is why I am very conscientious when someone asks me to be in their wedding. It can be a huge expense, but for dear friends it is an honor. I usually budget $1000-1500 per wedding. But like I said, it was different in my early 20s. Partly because I was broke & partly because I was too young to really know any better.

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