Post # 1
Hi fellow brides! Our wedding was last month and we’re just now checking all our gifts and one couple gave us $75. Everyone else gave us around $150 per couple. My husband has known her husband for many years and are pretty close. When we went to their wedding, we gave them a $250 gift. They are very well off. I am a bit insulted and hurt. Is this normal?
Post # 3
WOW!!!!!I really hope this is Made-Up Drama. If it isn’t Made-Up Drama I’m going to give you a bit of advice, NEVER say those words outloud to anyone!!! You never know what someone’s financial situation is, you should be happy that you received a gift.
Post # 4
- Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo
There are tons of possible explanations. Maybe that is how much they normally give at weddings, maybe they have fallen on hard times in the economy and even though it doesn’t show, they are penny pinching.. maybe they just don’t know wedding gift etiquette? I would leave it alone and give them the benefit of the doubt.. at least they gave you a gift!
Post # 5
I think $75 is perfectly acceptable and generous. Hell, anything given with love is acceptable. There’s no competition (we gave this much, so they should too). It’s true, you really don’t know people’s personal financial situation.
Post # 6
What do you mean – is this normal? I hate to break it you OP, but gifts are not tit for tat. Just because you gave X amount doesn’t mean that person is required to give you X amount as well. And just because they are well off does not mean you are entitled to a certain amount in gifts either. And who knows, maybe they aren’t as well off as the seem. Unless you are their accountant, you have no way of knowing their finances.
I think you should be grateful for the gift, stop comparing it to others, and write them a nice thank you note.
Post # 7
No one is required to give you a gift period. You should be happy with just their presence.
Post # 8
A gift is a gift. Be thankful that they gave you anything.
Post # 9
Is a wedding about gifts?
You dont know what their financial situation is. You know the saying “more money, more problems” They might have alot of bills, expenses, if they have kids etc.
Post # 10
Why don’t you call them and ask?
Post # 11
The gift you gave them should have been from the heart and given because you love and care about them, not because you were expecting a return on your investment. It’s a gift, not a savings accout. Gifts are signs of love and well wishes. Don’t get caught up in an amount. They could have sent a giant, ugly framed picture. Or bought a bunch of goats. Seriously. You have no reason to be upset.
Post # 12
I might be a bit miffed, but what can ya do.
Post # 13
It’s true that you don’t know a persons financial situation and someone could look very well off but they may be struggling. And since that could be the case, you’ll never really know why they gave what they did.
But, like you, I think its proper to gift in like-kind. There was a thread about a similar thing awhile back. It was about keeping a list, so even if it was 2 years later that a guest of your wedding was getting married, you could refer to it and give a gift that was similar to what they gave you. There were VERY mixed opinions. People around here feel strongly about it (many against keeping a list – so you’ll probably get harsh responses to this thread). But I’m with you – generally speaking, I think you should give what you get.
Post # 14
We gave a $75 gift to a wedding last year. It was all we could afford, and that was still a stretch. I hope our friends weren’t as displeased as you are. That would make me really sad.
Post # 15
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
$150 a couple? Damn I must be cheap because my personal budget limit is $50.
Post # 16
You do not know if they are well off or adept at using credit. Appearances are not always reality.
Send them a gracious thank you and move on.