Post # 1
I got engaged January of this year (2016) and we are not getting married until November 2017, so I haven’t started looking for a dress yet. However, I am not looking forward to dress shopping as I have no-one to share the experience with :-(.
I moved to New York from London 2 years ago for work and, while I have friends here, I do not feel close enough to any of them to invite them along. One of my best friends from home is coming for 2 weeks in April, followed by my sister for a week in May, but after that I’m pretty much by myself.
Are there any bees who went through the same thing? How did you cope with planning a wedding without your mother/sister/best friends?
Post # 2
My SIL had zero family here. We became really close friends and I was the one to help her with her wedding planning to gown shopping etc. Loved it from beginning to end. She was a beaming bride at the end of her wedding night. How about you do some online dress shopping and once your sister or friend arrive, you can take them to the shops that carry the gowns you’d like to try on.
Post # 3
Lots and lots of texting lol!!! I actually enjoyed shopping by myself!
Post # 4
I went dress shopping by myself the first time. A few months before getting engaged, we moved to a city where we didn’t know a ton of other ladies whom I felt close enough to bring along. I wanted to see for myself how I’d like certain silhouettes and materials. The consultant took photos, which I passed on to a select few. It was great!
Post # 5
I actually went once with my mom and SIL. They ended up making me feel pressured to buy a dress I wasn’t in love with. I got most of my money back and went shopping again, but alone. It was honestly way better. I didn’t feel alone either. The sales girls in the shop and the strangers there actually gave me some great unbiased opinions. I felt way less pressured. Sorry I don’t have other advice for you, just trying to put a positive spin on your situation! If you’re alone it’s all about you, you won’t have to worry about pleasing others.
Post # 6
My family is in another state as well as my close girl friends. I went dress shopping alone and enjoyed it a lot. No one pressuring me to make a decision I wasn’t comfortable with. And the consultants were all very helpful even offering their honest opinions when I asked since I was by myself. It was quite nice actually.
Post # 7
I did too!
I’ve been with my mom before and it was just too confusing – I wasn’t sure what I liked or what to look for – and found shopping by myself alot more relaxing!
Post # 8
I always knew wedding planning would be lonely for me, I only really have the one friend. I think it’s actually going to make for more of a tranquil experience! There’s less pressure and less drama when you do things yourself. You’ll be able to make the decisions you want to make without anyone to try to intervene or make you second guess yourself.
Post # 9
- Wedding: July 2017 - Vineyard on Long Island
my mother only lives 3.5ish hours away, so she is helping with the wedding planning, and I went to my first dress shop wtih her, but I’ve done all wedding dress related things since then by myself so far. And I actually think I prefer it.
It took me about 3 boutique visits to really start to figure out what type of silhouette, material, and neckline I prefer, and it’s been pretty easy from there to just pop into stores, pull out dresses that fit my criteria (and a few that don’t, always, just in case) and just try them on without having to waste time trying on dresses to appease whoever else you’re shopping with.
If you can, go dress shopping until you’ve found what you think is the one (or maybe the top 3), and then find a store that stocks all 3 designs in a size close to yours and facetime your mom/sister/friend.
Post # 10
I bought my dress online and avoided the whole ordeal. Loved my gown and felt amazing in it, plus it was exactly what I wanted without anyone else’s input. I had been through dress shopping so much in high school with prom dresses that I already knew what styles I liked and didn’t like. So it all worked out good for me. Sometimes it’s nicer to do things on your own and not feel pressured from others to get something you maybe don’t love. But if you want input see if your friend or sister would go with you when they visit. It will all work out!
Post # 11
Can you possibly skype or facetime your mom/sisters on a day you schedule to go dress shopping? I would try that route at the very least.
Post # 12
I had a similar situation, and like others have said, I loved shopping alone too. It gave me lots of time to really think about what I liked without worrying about others’ opinions.
There were two exceptions: I flew home for my first time trying on dresses, as I wasn’t yet looking seriously so I managed to have the fun of looking with my mum, sister and bestie. And mum flew over to see once I’d found my dress so she could ooh and aah over it (and ideally talk me out of it if it wasn’t right!) In both cases, the timing happened to be right as we had planned trips anyway. I was otherwise going to use Skype!
Post # 13
My mum passed away two years ago. I live in the UK and most of my friends and family live abroad. Plus, we’re eloping, so nobody knows about the wedding, so yes, it was just me.
I enjoyed it, it was a great experience and I didn’t feel I missed out. I am not sure I would have liked a gaggle of females commenting on every dress I tried. It worked out just fine.
Post # 14
I went with my sister and mom once, and didn’t find anything. I actually ended up buying a bunch of dresses online (that I could return) and then had my Fiance take pictures of me in them to text to my sister and mom (they don’t live in the same city, so it would have been hard to go shopping again). I basically had my dress picked out myself, but they confirmed that they liked it to via text. it worked out really well for me, but I wasn’t super into the whole thing.
If it is important to you, maybe when your friend or sister are in town, go for a quick trip. You could just try on a few different styles, and they could help you choose the style (if not the actual dress) and you could still get the feeling of shopping with someone close to you. Even if you aren’t ready to try on when they visit, you could just stop by a store and do some looking if you want?
Post # 15
I moved to a city for work, and have made 0 friends here. Yesterday, I just finished my third dress shopping appointment alone and tbh it was depressing.
The first 2 shops let me take pictures, which was slightly better because I got to “share” those with my mom and a friend. Yesterday, they had strict rules on no photos, so I just left feeling really down. I really loved one dress but since I can’t share it, I probably won’t end up buying it.