(Closed) wedding has passed and I feel I didn’t look my best

posted 12 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
450 posts
Helper bee

I totally understand.

I just keep reminding myself that I had so much fun, my guests had so much fun, and I am sure I didn’t look any differently than I normally do.  Sure I would have loved to have been thinner, brighter, all together prettier than I normally am, but is that realistic?  If I can live with how I look every other day of my life, why should I set these unrealistic expectations for this one day?  I think we set higher standards for ourselves for our wedding day and forget about the big picture.

I say, just keep replaying the best moments from your day over and over again.  The bad stuff fades away, but the good stuff lingers.

Post # 4
Member
17 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2007

wow… what a rude thing for your makeup artist to say!! i struggled with bad skin all throughout high school and college and I would get soooo upset and stressed out whenever someone pointed out my bad skin. I can’t imagine hearing something like that on your WEDDING DAY!! Frown I think ppl always tend to see the flaws on themselves a lot more magnified tha it really is. i’m sure your guests really did mean it when they said you looked beautiful!! don’t dwell on that…. dwell on how great of a time you had and that you are now finally married!!!

Post # 5
Member
330 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I have heard that facial or no facial, people with bad skin cannot predict what would happen. I had 2 mosquito bites on my face (fortunately on the side and it’s 2 days before) before my wedding. My make-up artist was awesome though and didn’t sweat about that. I don’t think she can be fazed by anything.

Regardless, just keep thinking about the great things that happened rather than dwell on the negative. Have you seen your pictures? Sometimes people refuse to believe that that they look beautiful even if lots of people tell them to their face!

Post # 6
Member
2316 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

… that was a TERRIBLE thing for her to say. Absolutely awful. I’m sure you looked absolutely BEAUTIFUL in your pictures, take two steps back and realize that so many people came together to celebrate with you on that day, and whatever your complexion was that day is NOT the most important thing. Your HUSBAND loves you no matter what, and this makeup artist is totally ridiculous for suggesting you do something in retrospect that, frankly, seems like overkill. I don’t get facials EVER and I don’t see any reason to start.

Post # 7
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I understand how you feel. I have an 8 month old and boy did I pack on the pounds during pregnancy. We’re talking more than 50 here people. I’ve lost close to 65 lbs now BUT I don’t feel the same way about myself. I weigh less than my pre-pregnancy weight and I can fit into -most- of my jeans but my face and body profile just isn’t the same. I’m afraid to see candid shots of myself =/ Anway, I can empathize how you may feel right now.

Post # 8
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Yeah, your makeup artist should never have said that. You would be surprised how some comments can influence the way you feel about yourself. And the good thing about bad skin on your wedding day is #1) you hired a professional makeup artist, so I’m sure she made you look as beautiful as possible and #2) Most pictures are from too far away to see any imperfections on your skin.

I have pretty decent skin after years of dermatologist visits, retin-a, and finally accutane usage but I even still break out every once in a while. I would think that most brides would around the wedding since it is the most stressful time.

I’m actually more worried about not getting enough sleep before the wedding – you can cover up a pimple, but can’t hide the fact that you haven’t slept at all. Especially since I’m getting older, it’s like every night that I don’t sleep 8 hours I get a new wrinkle.

Post # 9
Member
131 posts
Blushing bee

I hope you send that (unprofessional) makeup artist a note telling her that you keep repeating in your head what she said to you that day.  Unprofessional and uncalled for, and she should know never to say something like that to anyone else again.

I am sure you DID look incredible!  My sister has horrible problems with her skin and feels self -onscious about it, but I don’t think anyone else honestly notices.  When she looks beautiful and happy, she looks beautiful and happy, and that’s what I see instead of any problems she’s having with her skin.

Post # 10
Member
410 posts
Helper bee

I have had bad backne as a young teen and still struggle with it today. I even went as far last year as to start Accutane which is poison in a pill. My back cleared up dramatically and I was super excited BUT recently it has started to reappear. I hate that I’m so self conscious about it especially when BF tells me that I’m gorgeous no matter what…blah blah. I’m about to start on a new treatment and if this works I will most likely go under the laser to get rid of the scars by my wedding day…when ever that is!

I hope that you don’t think you looked bad! I’m sure your husband felt like the luckiest guy in the world that day! Just remember that true beauty comes from the inside.

Post # 11
Member
612 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Awe, I can totally relate. As a matter of fact I am feeling bummed about my skin right now! I have horrible skin. I have come to realize that I may have to deal with this horrible skin on my wedding day. I am fair too, which just means red, angry zits appear even more visible.

I think you should wait until you see your pictures – I bet you will look fantastic! I am sure your makeup artist gave you great coverage. I know its hard, becuase I closely examine my face everyday in the mirror, and I notice all the imperfections. But the pictures will show what a beautiful person you are – both inside and out!

 

Post # 12
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I don’t usually have this problem, but I broke out a little on my neck/chest/arms right before the wedding.  Those blemishes are fairly easy to photoshop out, but I couldn’t believe it! I didn’t get any facials before the wedding…they just weren’t in the budget!

I’m sure you did look gorgeous on your wedding day…the bridal glow shines past so many imperfections! (and if you’re really concerned, know that editing the photos is always an option.)

Post # 13
Bee
5113 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2009 - Barr Mansion

Oh man, I totally broke out right before the wedding!  I don’t think people could tell, but it definitely shows in some of the photos–maybe time for some photoshop action?

Post # 14
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Well, when referring to your makeup artist, you should put “pro” in quotes, because a genuine professional makeup artist would have a lot of experience in dealing with skin problems. People with perfect skin aren’t the ones driving the demand for professional makeup artists, after all! If it makes you feel any better, there are many, MANY Hollywood stars — women who anyone would classify as “beautiful” — who have TERRIBLE skin. Makeup can’t make you look 50 pounds lighter, but it can cover bumps really well. Your makeup artist was clearly less experienced and capable than she wanted you to know, and covered that up by making a comment guaranteed to make you ill at ease, so that you wouldn’t feel comfortable enough to critique her.

That having been said, I understand where you’re coming from. I look at the initial pictures of my wedding day and really, really, REALLY wish that someone had told me to BRUSH MY BANGS already, because geez. But when people who were at the wedding see me, they gush about how “stunning” I was, unprompted. Miss Manners is right: All brides are beautiful. Including you. (And Photoshop was made to deal with spots. Doubt you’ll need that, but still.)

Public Service Announcement to all of those with skin problems: If you can afford to go to a dermatologist and have not done so, do so. It’s amazing what they can do. (My tip for non-face acne in lieu of a dermatologist’s visit: Wash every day with an exfoliating scrub containing salicylic acid or benzoyl peroxide, then apply a benzoyl peroxide cream post-shower/bath. The skin on my face is super-delicate and can’t tolerate anything beyond salicylic acid, but non-facial skin tends to be tougher than facial skin.)

Post # 15
Member
749 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

She said what??? That is so inappropriate and unprofessional. Write up reviews wherever you can of that. And you know what, I bet you did look beautiful. There’s a glow that comes from being a bride that nothing can replicate. I was kind of shocked that it happened to me. My Maid/Matron of Honor thought I was wearing a full face of makeup in the morning when I wasn’t wearing anything because I was just so happy. We all have bumps, spots, the whole works and it’s okay. That’s what makeup covers!

Post # 16
Member
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I agree with everyone else; your makeup artist seems less than professional. A true pro knows how to work with all kinds of skins, not just smooth, blemish-free faces.  Don’t worry about your pictures, any bumps that show can be erased.  I’m sure you looked beautiful on your day!! 🙂 

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