(Closed) Wedding in about 3 weeks – Still don't love my dress. I'm heartbroken.

posted 5 years ago in Dress
Post # 32
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2016 - Liberty House

First off, I’m so sorry to hear you’re in such a predicament!

I’m currently the maid of honor for a bride who was in a very similar situation, in that, with 3 weeks left until her wedding, she needed to find a new dress! Her original dress got messed up in alterations, and she was having a lot of difficulty getting it fixed. Not only that, the dress was a sample so there were some issues with the dress to begin with.

Since you’re also in NYC, I would suggest you do what she did. Try going to a wedding rental shop–there are quite a few in the city and Queens. They mostly cater to an Asian clientele because it’s common for Asian brides to rent their dresses instead of buying them. However, since you are a street size 0-2, you would be able to fit into most, if not all of the dresses, so you should definitely give it a shot! They mostly carry designers like Maggie Sottero and Mori Lee. 

Anyway, the bride ended up finding a GORGEOUS dress that she loved for $350, and the best part is, the rental shop will alter & steam the dress at no additional cost so that it’s ready for your big day! You wouldn’t have to worry about finding a separate seamstress to do last minute alterations for a new dress.

Here are the Yelp links to some of the shops:

http://www.yelp.com/biz/true-love-wedding-studio-flushing

http://www.yelp.com/biz/charisol-bridal-boutique-bayside

http://www.yelp.com/biz/paris-wedding-center-flushing?osq=true+love+wedding

http://www.yelp.com/biz/imperial-studio-flushing?osq=wedding+rental

Hope that helps!! Good luck!!

Post # 33
Member
139 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Go to RK bridal on 57th and the west side highway – they don’t take appointments and have TONS of dresses. I would call and confirm ahead of time to make sure they sell sample dresses.

GOODLUCK

Post # 34
Member
11519 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think it looks great on you but if it’s not what you envisioned then it’s not.

I suggest trying to get something off the rack this weekend – who knows, maybe you’ll try on your ‘dream dress’ and hate it and realize you really do like this dress.  I had the opposite problem to you – I LOVED my dress, no one else did.  I pretty much told them to shove it and bought it, I couldn’t have been happier (and they all came around, or at least pretended to!)

Post # 35
Member
11469 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

There’s also rent the runway if you can’t find something, but your dress looks beautiful on you. 

Post # 36
Member
889 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Diplomat Country Club

upsetbride5:  I’m going to be honest with you i had the same feeling about my dress. I kept feeling that i should have a ball gown i mean really when will i ever had the chance to wear a ballgown again. Although i ordered my dress already (which is a trumpet/mermaid) i went to try on the ballgown well let’s just say i felt much better about my dress but to have that extra pouf at the bottom i ordered a crinoline skirt for 13$ from jj house and it is now PERFECT. So how about trying ur dress with extra pouf to get that extra that you are missing? And go try on the ball gown to see if you really love it better. Davids bridal is having a big sale right now you can find something for a low cost or even check preownedweddingdresses.com or brides power fr the dress you love

Post # 37
Member
903 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I think brides put SO much emphasis on the dress and it’s rather silly.  My mom is buying my dress and she felt so bad she could only afford $1,000 dress budget.  I said, mom, if I could find one for $100 that fit I’d be happy.  It’s a dress. You’re making yourself sick over one dress that you are going to wear one day in your life.  It’s just a dress.  And it’a a beautiful dress.

Post # 38
Member
2342 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

upsetbride5:  Wow! This is beautiful and your figure looked perfect in it. I know they shouldn’t have, but I do understand your family pushing you into this one. So sorry it isn’t your dream dress but don’t forget your OH won’t share your dream dress and I’m pretty sure that when he sees you on your wedding day, this will be it!

Post # 39
Member
10 posts
Newbee

When I read your post, I teared up because it’s exactly what I went through. My mom even offered to buy me a new dress. When the reality of being able to have a new dress hit me, I realized parting with my dress hurt me even more. We had already been through so much together!
Your dress looks absolutely amazing on you. You have an amazing figure, the dress is beautiful! And it is classic and timeless. OWN IT! If you put it on and tell yourself you look like a million bucks, everyone will think it, too! If you walk around upset, everyone will see it on your face.

That’s what I did. And as I wore it and looked back through my pictures— I realized, the dress was perfect. I couldn’t have imagined another dress.

So I want you to imagine this scenario: List your dress on EBay. Sell it. Buy a new dress. If the thought of none of that dissapoints you or makes you sad, DO IT!.

I found your dress on preowned bride: You could easily alter it from an 8 to a 2:

https://www.preownedweddingdresses.com/dresses/view/140239/Pronovias-OCTAVIA-Size-4.html

Post # 40
Member
10 posts
Newbee

But… really the point to my post. Keep your dress. It’s perfect. It is YOUR dress. Now love her! 🙂

Post # 41
Member
64 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Good luck!

Post # 42
Member
471 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Since this thread got bumped, I just want to add a comment.

A lot of us go in expecting to buy a certain kind of dress, and it doesn’t happen. I envisioned a pure white lace and tulle ballgown, and I ended up with  a black lace mermaid. That doesn’t mean that the original vision is “ruined.” Vision and reality don’t have to be the same!

That said, the notion that there is one dress that you will love is utter bogus (blame SYTTD), and it makes brides so unhappy. I bought and sold at least six different dresses online (making all my $ back, thank god) because I became so obsessed with finding the “perfect” dress. Now, 11 months after my wedding, and looking back, I realize that I probably would have been happy in ANY of those dresses! And when I see new dresses now, I often think, “yeah, I could have gotten married in that.” I’ll see a ballgown and think, “If I had worn a ballgown, that would be the one,” or a sheath, etc.

The truth is, there are a LOT of stunning wedding dresses out there that will make you look gorgeous. We have to choose one, but there are a multitude of “looks” that you could have gone for instead.  I went for a traditionalish, long-sleeved, lace mermaid silhouettte, but part of me had always envisioned a very modern satin sheath with architectural details like giant bows. (think Junko Yoshioka/Anna Meier/Oscar de la Renta). Yeah, when I see a dress like that, sometimes I go, “Ooooh, that would have been beautiful,” and I feel a little wistful.

But on the other side now, long past my wedding? I don’t really care. As long as you feel beautiful (and you really should in that dress!), it doesn’t really matter what you wear. Because there will ALWAYS be “another dress.” Or another venue, another color pattern, another set of earrings. There are infinite looks and designs and palettes (thanks Pinterest) that you would probably have loved. There is NO “one perfect wedding.” And on the day of, you won’t care. Really. You’ll be SO excited to get married. And you will look so amazing with your hair, and makeup, and jewelry, that the dress will just be one more piece to get you down that aisle.

And once the wedding is over, the honeymoon is over, the excitement dies down….it won’t matter. It doesn’t matter to me now. I loved my wedding, and I did love my dress, but it’s done. I don’t spend days moaning over, “what if….”, because I’m on life’s next adventure. And you will be, too, sooner than you know it.

So rest easy in the fact that even if it wasn’t what you expected, you do look beautiful and classic, and your groom will be blown away, and you will have a wonderful wedding day no matter what. And all of the details you pine over now really won’t matter in a year. You won’t remember them. But you will remember the emotions- the feeling when you see him for the first time, the wonderful things your friends say to you as you get ready, the funny quip someone makes as you line up to walk. Don’t let a small detail take the emotion of the day from you.

Post # 43
Member
730 posts
Busy bee

I know you already know this, but when you feel really bummed, try to think of how many people flip out three weeks in advance because they don’t know if they have the right GROOM, or worse, they know in their hearts that they don’t. That is some serious, awful, heavy stuff that I would never wish on anything. I’m not being dismissive of you, at all, just hoping that reminding yourself of this will help you smile, realize how lucky you are, and shake it off.

That said, not loving your dress sucks. I would definitely check out a few department stores over lunch on the off-chance that you’ll find your perfect one off the rack. If not, I would STILL buy another dress to change into at some point. Doesn’t have to be a bridal dress, just one you love, for fun.

I wonder if you could also meet with a seamstress and think of some ways to alter the dress you currently have?

Post # 44
Member
1319 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

upsetbride5:  I know this is several days old and I haven’t read the other comments, but I didn’t click with my dress until the Tuesday before my Saturday wedding. I was wearing my mom’s dress and although I loved the sentiment, it was NOT at ALL the dress I would have picked if I’d purchased my own. It made me feel chubby and awkward and stiff. I just kept hoping it would look good on the day of. I put it on that Tuesday with a good steam job and some new undergarments (not recommended to switch undergarments after your fittings, but mine weren’t working) and it looked completely different to me and I felt beautiful for the first time in it.

The topic ‘Wedding in about 3 weeks – Still don't love my dress. I'm heartbroken.’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors