Hi @tonick788: I think we understood each other.
Everything needs to begin with your well ironed out Guest List.
What I am saying is you should send Invites to Everyone… whether you think they’ll come or not… it is the polite thing to do
If you’ve figured out your Guest List should be made up of Parents, Siblings, Aunts & Uncles First Cousins & also Friends of yourself & your Groom … then you’d send out the Invites that correspond to that list to the South Americans in the first round (with RSVP Date # 1)
As the NOs come back in, you keep track
Ie You are having a Wedding for 145 People (capacity). And you send out 25 Invites to South America which covers 80 People.
You get back 75 Nos for the 80 People, and 5 Yeses (Aunt & Uncle & 2 Kids… an a Young Adult who wants to make the trip to America)
You now are a situation where you “technically” can accommodate 140 People
So you send out Round # 2 of your Invites with the 2nd RSVP Deadline
Altho, I’d leave a bit of a “safety gap” / wiggle room… so instead of sending out Invites that correspond to 140 People, I’d send out for say 130.
At the end of the process you get back 110 Yesses and 20 Nos.
You now have 110 + 5 People who are confirmed to attend = 115
If you have enough lead time, you could send out a few more invites… The “B” List… by taking the 20 Nos and inviting half as many people again…
So 20 Nos, becomes Invites for 10… or say 5 Couples that you and your Finace have as friends.
Hope this helps,
B Lists are tricky… in that you have to manage them well, and the Guests cannot be aware that they are on said B List. It all comes down to sending things out with enough lead time to the RSVP Deadline. And leaving space for anyone who may have said NO and later become a YES
In the scenario above you’d end up with:
5 South American Relatives + 110 People from your A List + 10 People from your B List = 125 Total
And if someone should change their mind at the last minute to go from NO to YES you still have space to accommodate them.
I hope I’ve explained it better this time… you can ask more Questions if need be.