(Closed) Wedding invites…tacky or OK?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Is it tacky to have people RSVP online rather than through mail?
    Yes, stick with the formal paper RSVP cards for guests to fill out! : (20 votes)
    11 %
    No, it is ok to do it either way! : (163 votes)
    89 %
  • Post # 31
    799 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    we used rsvp cards and also had on them in small writing at the bottom something like “to rsvp online and for more info, visit our wedding website at http://www.nameandname.com”  I’d say half rsvp’d online and half via mail.

    Post # 33
    129 posts
    Blushing bee

    Ele88:  I made business cards that matched the RSVP  cards that linked to our website to RSVP so they can do either. After I heard enough times that people dont even RSVP when you give them a pre addressed card stamped and everything and they still dont even send it back they are really less likely to go to your website/email to RSVP I had a coworker who tried to do email RSVP and out of over 100 guest I think she got like 3 RSVP (and she only did online RSVP) I already had the post card stamps from our save the dates so I figured $20 was worth the ease of mind

    Post # 34
    894 posts
    Busy bee

    I’m having RSVP response cards and my brother is doing formal invites with the online RSVP. I’m fine with either option. My Fiance was super into the invitations and wanted them to be traditional. I would have been happy with E-vite! Lol. 

    I should add that I don’t think the RSVP method has anything to do with how formal the event is. My wedding is a lot more casual than my brothers (summertime in a vineyard) and his is a NYE wedding.

    Post # 35
    783 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    EllyAnne:   That is actually tradition, which surprised me to find out. While it is totally annoying, I do see the appeal for the bride and groom. Nice keepsakes.

    Post # 36
    2098 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Ele88:  I am doing what blue birdie suggeted- I went to a local print shop (like generic kinkos) and preited on card stock 12 RSVP cards (just did it myself, nothing fancy) that I will include just for the elderly invitees who maybe can’t figure out the onine system. Many many are doing online only RSVP now, it’s not tacky! Oh and the 12 reply cards with envelopes cost $7! 



    Post # 37
    206 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I did that ๐Ÿ™‚ I think RSVP cards are too outdated for me. The older people in our family had the option to call or someone else did their RSVP online for them. It was totally fine, and also a lot easier/faster so more people RSVPd as soon as they got the invitations.

    • This reply was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by  mochikj.
    Post # 38
    2331 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Ele88:  I think it depends….. we couldn’t do online RSVPs because we had to invite a lot of older people that probably wouldn’t know how. So we just did the cards.

    I went to a wedding recently to which we rsvpd online and like a PP said, we rsvpd almost immediately because it was much much more convenient. 

    I don’t see it as tacky at all. Do what works for you ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 39
    656 posts
    Busy bee

    Ele88:  good choice OP! I used wedding wire and it was great. You can do your seating chat on it afterwards with the same data, too. The other thing I liked about it was that no one could add other people to the RSVP list, as all the names are already in there. 

    Post # 40
    1482 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    Ele88:  We included a paper card RSVP, but because some of our guests are from other countries, we couldn’t pay for the postage in advance. So we said that you can alos RSVP to our wedding email address that I set up especially for that purpose.

    I don’t think people mind as long as it’s not something that inconveniences them.

    Post # 41
    2968 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    We’re doing online RSVPs! We’re using RSVPify.com, and it keeps track of everything for you! Meal choices, you can ask individual guests for dietary restrictions, and you can put in your guest list so that only people on the list can RSVP (up to 100 guests free, more than that you have to pay for it)

    For our invites, on the insert card, it says “Please respond no later than (date) by visiting (website) or by calling (our phone number)”

    Post # 42
    79 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    Whichever gets you answers most efficiently shouldn’t be considered tacky ๐Ÿ™‚

    In Malaysia, the responding is usually done over the phone/SMS/Whatsapp et al. We can’t really be arsed to return an RSVP card (never received onewith an invite, actually!), but then I might be generalizing ๐Ÿ˜›

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