(Closed) Wedding is next month, and all I feel is guilty and stressed

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1963 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Girl there is nothing wrong with you! Of course you are stressed with all that going on. I know you said you talked to Fiance before, but maybe it’s time for another chat? Let him know that you aren’t his mom, and if he isn’t working then you need other contributions from him. Sit together and make a list for splitting things up. Tell him how stressed out you are feeling and that this bit of help from him would improve things. Hopefully he’ll get the message!

Post # 4
Member
5958 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Oh punkin, it’s times like this I tell myself something my grandfather, who is 92 and amazing by the way, says…please commit this to memory and repeat:

“We didn’t come here to save money or loose weight.”

I think that sums it up, life isn’t fun unless your doing at least three things that make you feel a little guilty…your problem is you aren’t misbehaving enough..forget the house cleaning, forget the bills, get yourself some cheap wine, chocoloate covered strawberries and start the weekend with a wine fueled, chocolate complimented hunky movie bender…you’ve earned it!

Post # 5
Member
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Nona99  You might just be my fav Bee on the site. Your comments always make me smile and your one to the OP is something I needed to hear today!

OP I’ve been exactly where you are and even now feel like maybe I made this wedding too much, too much time spent on it, money, stress and it’s left me feeling a bit heavy hearted about the whole event. Now it’s next week I do feel better about it even thought there are STILL things I need to pay for (ughhhh It just goes on and on and on!)- and we cut back on a hellva lot too. Someone made our cake, someone else is DJ, someone else is doing my make up, I’m doing my own hair.

BUT! When all said and done, Nona is right, if you weren’t doing this and were putting the money away and everything was done by the rules. Would you actually be any happier? You and I wanted our weddings, we wanted this day, otherwise we’d have never started the journey. What’s done is done now, finish off what you can and let the rest go and I promise you, when it comes to a week to go, excitement will override every negative feeling you have.

Good luck!

Post # 7
Member
5958 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@Soon2BeeMrsG:  You just made my day!  Now off with the both of you, for fun, relaxation and zero stress…it causes wrinkles you know?

Post # 8
Member
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Nona99 I leave work in 20 mins and I will- as per your instruction, pick up wine, choc and something delicious for dinner and do so all with a trashy romcom. A good old night in with ME!

You talk too much sense for that not to be right!

Post # 10
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Nona99:  This is great. I am going to use it.

Post # 11
Member
183 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Look to the future as you sip the wine, better days will come.  Look for other work, and once your Fiance and you are a bit better off (as in he finishes school and starts making money) you can send your parents on vacation as thanks for helping with the wedding, or something like that.  Sucky things don’t suck forever, we all went through tough times at one point or another.  Everything will be OK in the end, if it’s not OK it’s not the end.

Post # 12
Member
901 posts
Busy bee

I agree, wine, chocolate, trashy romcoms, that pretty much saves everything!!

Try Cupcake Red Velvet wine. About $12 at the grocery store and actually tastes like red velvet, but not super sweet. I could drink a gallon of it on the right day, haha.

I agree that you need to be more specific about your FI’s chores. Also, consider dumping cable altogether and get a Roku. We did and saved about $130 a month. We just pay for Hulu and Netflix monthly (7.99 each). When Mad Men is on, we pay 2.99 an episode to watch the current episodes as soon as they come out on Amazon Video. That’s the only show we really like to watch right away, so it works for us.

Also, ask your Fiance to sign up for focus groups in the area. I just got a $175 Visa gift card from one where I just had to talk about batteries for an hour. That’s two trips to the grocery store for us! It really adds up.

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