Post # 16
If you are going to the Courthouse the I think you should invite your family along. You can also invite your FI’s family, and hopefully they would attend. That sounds like what you want – saying cows surrounded by family and friends. Get a photographer or have someone take photos. then just have lunch, or drinks or whatever with your family. You could even go back to your parents house to celebrate. Then use Vegas as a mini-honeymoon. Or bring the white dress to Vegas and do an elopement there. Whatever makes you excited. I’d start looking around for photos of Vegas elopements. Photos help me get excited. Here’s one: https://apracticalwedding.com/2015/04/las-vegas-elvis-chapel-neon-museum-elopement/
and I’ll just throw this out there. If I was going to elope I would have gone to Gatlinburg which is where the Smokey Mountains are. I love Vegas and it has a lot of options but I also love the beauty of all those mountains.
kerrily + charles: smoky mountains elopement
Post # 17
How about Anna Maria Island, Florida.
I’m a Brit and Ive been on holiday there. It’s calm and laid back. They do wedding packages and you could have a beach wedding complete with a beautiful beach wedding dress. It’s not tacky or crowded or busy. It’s within an easy driving distance of Tampa and St Petersberg.
Post # 18
I kind of agree with GimmickGirl, invite whoever you want to join you at the courthouse, (-if they show up great, if not, their loss) wear your wedding dress, get bouquet and bout, and a photographer, have photos. If you want to you could just have a short and sweet cake and punch reception, it wouldn’t have to be long at all. Then plan something spectacular for the two of you. We didn’t have much of a honeymoon-but a one night get-away at a nice hotel. This couple did their elopement in Canada- gorgeous!! http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/one-year-already-flew-by/
and here: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/eastern-bc-venues/
Whatever you do, make it special for you!
Post # 19
I’m so sorry Bee that your dream intimate wedding isn’t coming together like you imagined. Expectations are the thief of joy. I was so worried when I began to read this thread that you and your Fiance broke up (from the headline) but now after reading it all, I totally understand and personally am in a similar situation with parents recently having a terrible seperation.
I hope you can invite at least one family to the courthouse then plan another reception/family dinner with the other or one. Maybe invite your family and then have a dinner with FI’s so you can focus on damage control if his parents have a tenuous relationship right now. Ultimately, even if they won’t mesh, they should still help you celebrate your happiness. You can make of this what you want and though it might not be what you dreamed of, you can set up the situation so that it’s easier on you by design i.e. I mean holding a courthouse wedding with one family then a family dinner with the other. You can do this and make of it what you want. I hope it all works out <3
Post # 20
A lot of great ideas here, thanks everyone. The quote ‘expectation is the theif of joy’ is very fitting.
Im feeling all over the place about this right now, it’s really difficult. Even though Fiance isn’t in a good place with his family right now, we both feel it would be rude to exclude them, but Invite others. The funny thing is, my mom and sister are very much ‘go elope!’ and I’m the one feeling guilty about not having them there. I’m so confused. I think you imagine things a certain way your whole life and then all of a sudden you realize they won’t be that way. I didn’t expect to be this emotional.
And to top it all off I ate a ton of junk and Halloween candy and I feel even worse 😩
Post # 21
The most important thing is that you are happy. Would you be happy having your wedding for $8000 and seeing all of the miserable people who are going through the motions and don’t want to be there? We are also eloping because of family and friends issues and I feel relieved. Sit down and think about what you want and what will make you happy.
Post # 22
this is helpful, thank-you! the idea of spending that kind of money and people just going through the motions is definetly not what I had in mind! What are you and your Fiance doing?
Post # 23
I’m sorry, bee! It sounds like eloping (maybe somewhere in Canada or somewhere, generally, more special to you as a couple?) is the option that makes the most sense. But just because something is the more logical option doesn’t mean that it might not hurt a little to choose it. Hugs!
Post # 24
I think a courthouse wedding can be totally romantic. It’s just for the two of you. I know it’s completely devastating to miss out on the big wedding day like you always pictured it. Although the wedding is off, the marraige is still happening… you still get to be with your future husband and have a nice few days together. Hvae fun and enoy the day, trying not to think about what you missed out on… it will still be incredibly special!
Post # 25
I think your family sees the stress it’s causing you and just wants you to be happy! if you want them there, have them there! heck, you can have an officiant come to your house and marry you in your living room if you want! then for a really reasonable amount of money you can take them out to a fabulous dinner to celebrate. Don’t choose something that will make you sad, choose something that will make you happy and focus on enjoying the day you marry your love!
Post # 26
the quote is “comparison is the thief of joy”, which I mention because I think expectations are fine things to have and can help you decide what is most important to you. It sounds like having your family there is really important to you. That sounds like something you have been expecting since you got engaged or even before that. I think that is a fine expectation. While my parents are alive I could not have gotten married without them with me. In whatever form that took, courthouse, small wedding, medium size wedding, etc. If that matters to you, plan something they can attend.
Talk to you Fiance about his parents. If they live near by not inviting them to the ceremony would be a big deal. But maybe that’s where your relationship with them is at. I think you can feel comfortable inviting your parents as long as Fiance has an equal option of inviting his parents – weather or not they come.
I also think no matter how terrible they are, they could hold it together for a brief courthouse ceremony and lunch or dinner. I get avoiding the stress and the expense. But all weddings – even small elopments – have their stressful moments. If that is what you want then go for it. My wedding was incredibly stressful and if someone had urged me to call it off, there were moments when I would have. But it was an amazing day and I don’t regret the time or expense I spent. It was what I wanted. I had a day with all my favorite people with me as I married my DH.
It sounds lime, at worst you guys don’t know what to talk about at lunch, and then you all go home and your families don’t have to spend a lot of time together in the future!
Post # 27
When DH and I were married it wad just us, the pastor and his wife, and our two boys. That’s it and our union felt and is very much real.