(Closed) Wedding is two months away, should I cancel?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
9575 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

He is a complete ass! Listen to your inner self and cancel your wedding. You will regret mArrying him.

Post # 3
Member
1285 posts
Bumble bee

I wouldn’t get married just from this statement alone “He is also concerned that I won’t fulfill the ‘tasks’ of a wife: all of the housework and running his errands as well as working full time and in the future raising children.” 

 

Post # 4
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee

Just from what you posted, yes, you should call off the wedding and probably end the relationship completely.  

You feel like you have to walk on eggshells around him.  He makes nasty comments about your figure.  You have issues with his anger and mood swings.  His answer to “why do you want to get married” is I don’t know, it is just something people do.  You have constant arguments/fall outs. You have continually, for months, been questioning your decision to marry him.

If all of those aren’t huge red flags, then I don’t know what is.

Cancelling a wedding is hard, but getting a divorce is even harder.

Post # 5
Member
4020 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

He sounds like a jerk. I’d cut my losses now and deal with the headache of a cancelled wedding now rather than the huge ordeal of dealing with an inevitable divorce later. Going on vacations with someone and enjoying your time together sometimes isn’t enough to sustain a marriage. He belittles you and is only marrying you because of outside pressures. You deserve better. 

Post # 6
Member
2860 posts
Sugar bee

I stopped reading after the second paragraph.  He’s a jerk. I wouldn’t have coffee with him, let alone consider marrying him.

Post # 7
Member
307 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I think you know deep down what you need to do, I hate telling people what their decisions should be, but since you asked – it sounds like you’d be dodging a bullet. Size 8 uk is hardly ‘fat’ and for him to insinuate that youd look good slimmer than you are is absolutely unacceptable and wrong. You want to be loved unconditionally, imagine when you get pregnant. Of course you’ll gain weight, what kind of a question is that! He sounds shallow and insecure and he’s dragging you into it, which is unfair to you. 

You shouldn’t feel like you’re walking on eggshells. I know you’ve been through a lot of great experiences and loving moments together, but I can’t fathom anyone staying happily married to someone who talks to them like that, and whom they have to walk on eggshells around. 

Post # 8
Member
66 posts
Worker bee

This does not sound like a happy, healthy relationship. And from what you wrote it sounds like you know what you want to do, you just need some validation. So here it is… Cancel your wedding! 

Post # 9
Member
685 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Listen to your gut and run. He sounds like an abusive husband in the making. 

Post # 10
Member
697 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Nope nope nope! You know the answer or you wouldn’t have needed to post.

Post # 11
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

Those are all red flags!  I would not marry this guy!  He sounds like an ass and it doesn’t sound like you will be happy with him at all :/

Post # 12
Member
497 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

View original reply
crescentmoon:  your gut is right, I’d run! He sounds horrible, really.

Post # 13
Member
1299 posts
Bumble bee

Those aren’t “wife” tasks, By The Way. Gross.

Post # 14
Member
2871 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

DTMFA. 

Post # 15
Member
1164 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I think you’re asking because you already know what you want to do.  Listen to your inner voice because it’s talking to you loud and clear.

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