- 8 years ago
- Wedding: January 2011
My wedding is less then a month away. I’ve always pictured myself as the kind of bride who values the marriage more than the wedding and that nothing that could go wrong with a wedding should be allowed to ruin the day.
Yes well.. It all began when my family decided to move the wedding from April to January. I know that sounds like a nightmare for most brides however it didn’t matter too much to us because this is a big wedding we will have overseas for mostly family and family friends. Since they are paying for it, and planning it all by asking me over the phone, I figured it won’t matter to have it few months ahead of schedule.
This brought up the step of “finding a dress” into “OMG I have to find a dress! I knew the exact dress I was going to wear. I spent “hours” online researching. Do I hear you brides laughing out there? Only hours? I knew my exact dress?
What a big joke!!! Yes ladies, the ones who were laughing are exactly right. The gown I chose was so simple and elegant that I would end up looking more like a bridesmaid than a bride. I originally picked Onil by Manuel Mota. Turns out they didn’t have one in the store, not in my size.. not in any size. I would have to order it, pay for it (which was close to 5k) and receive it just before the wedding, and learn to like it because I would be stuck with it. After putting on a similar style in the store and having a sales lady, the manager, my mom, myself and a friend go through every possible way to dress up the gown like as if it’s a new Christmas tree waiting to be decorated, we came to the conclusion that I would wear a huge diamond necklace, long gloves, a fur shawl, a tiara, lace veil…. at some point I resembled a Halloween bride more than a real one. PANIC MOMENT1
I suddenly realized that I have no idea what I want to wear. All I knew is that I didn’t want a poofy skirt and look like Cinderella. I’ve ended up looking at every style I loved in the catalog and hating them all. Possibly because at 5’6 and size 2, I was still not tall or slim enough to have the dress look like it does on the models in the catalogs. Are they standing on a stool? Because it’s unnatural for anyone to have such freakishly long legs!
At the end I had only one dress I was close to buying. It was Destino by La Sposa. Oh how I despised that dress. Hehe Here is why; The gown is stunning. It has a beautiful top with beading and pleats and it stays in place so perfectly. The rest is mermaid with a slight tail f 2 layers of lace. It’s really nice but on me I hated the bell look. I didn’t like that it didn’t move with me, I moved with it. After trying it on about 5 times in different stores in 2 weeks period, I knew this was the dress I would wear but I knew it wasn’t “the one”. I also knew that “the one” didn’t exist for me. Mom loved it, friends loved it.. To make it better, I’ve decided to wear the gown without the …(I forgot the name for it) tulle that goes under it so the bottom falls out softer as opposed to standing like a bell. After few days of searching and stressing about it, I went to the store with mom to pay for it. The manager said: “I think it’s the best dress for you but I just got a dress today. Would you like to see it?” I tried it on. Talk about the Cinderella dress. Sweetheart neck with a huge poofy tulle skirt. (Alcanar by Pronovias) My mother said that it looked like a dress drawn by an 8 year old. Funny thing is she is brilliant and always right ! This is the exact dress every 8 year old girl would draw when asked what they would wear while dancing with the prince at the ball. I felt that mom hated it, and she still liked the mermaid. I loved it.. I did! Who knew that deep down I was that girl? The one who loves the princess gowns? I wasn’t that girl even when I was 8! Well it was time for me to acknowledge the new me and get the poof dress.. except I wanted to make mom happy. At the end of the day I will wear this gown for only a day so is it worth upsetting mom ? —Remember little while ago I mentioned that mom is brilliant? This is where she proves it to us again— Mom made me try both gowns, looked into my eyes and said “ok we will take the poofy one” At which point, true to my new-found-girly-self I cried like a little girl. Embarrassing? oh yes!
Now It’s the end of December. My gown has arrived. It has lace sweetheart strapless neckline, and a tulle skirt. Layers of it. What I love the most is that the lace on the body sort of spills over the tulle. Very well done. I dislike the gowns where the waist is dropped or when the top finishes and suddenly the skirt pops out. This is done exactly the way I love it. Subtle and romantic.. Very aerial. I have pictures of it. Very swan lake type of gown.
Now that this is settled. so far every detail has been planned out. All I need to do is to pick a song. My fiancee and I do not have a song. Is that so strange? Once I complained to him that we didn’t have a song and if we ever got married we wouldn’t even know what to play.. He responded (ready for this?) “Why do we have to have a song? what if we had a fruit? How about Orange? From now on we have our own fruit!!” I laughed when he said that..
I am not laughing at the moment ! I supposed when we are asked to do our first dance we will stand there and eat an orange. PANIC MOMENT 2 So far we have “can’t help falling in love” by Elvis Presley. It’s nice but I’m not sold on it yet. I love the song “at last” but I wanted something unique. My fiancee is from Spain so I thought something Spanish ! This is a great idea in theory except I do not speak Spanish and most songs I can find are songs from South America. We both love the song Perfidia by a Cuban band named Pepe Lopez E Los Trinitarios. Great song! If you speak Spanish and you know the song I can already hear you giggling. Apparently the lyrics are sad.. more than that it’s depressing.. suicidal break up song. I’ve tried to find other Spanish songs but my fiancee kept saying “but I’m not Dominican…. Peruvian…. Mexican….” Well to make a long story short I’ve found enough song that he denied to make up a map of South America. So far we still don’t have a song. I’ve just heard “have a little faith in me” by John Hiatt from the movie Love Happens. It sounds lovely but I keep thinking about the sound systems in the wedding halls. (or ball rooms in the hotels) Almost every wedding I’ve been to has the same story. Bride and the groom picks a lovely song but never thinks of the way it will sound in a room with those huge speakers. If the guy is screaming, glasses are shaking. Also why I tend to stay away from screaming lady songs.. (there goes Celine Dion)
On the subject of music I must mention that I absolutely adore Nina Simone and Billie Holiday. Especially one song by Billie which is called “The very thought of you” is a song I’ve listened to for many many years with absolute delight. Sadly because it’s been recorded such a long time ago the sound quality will be very ear pitching at the wedding. I’ve been checking out the other artist renditions. No one is Billie.
Now you know pretty much where I stand… I thought I was doing great ! Until last night.
For no apparent reason what so ever last night I woke up from a nightmare.. It was towards the end of my wedding, and I suddenly realized that the photographer never shoved up and we never had any pictures taken. I turned to my husband and said “””::: GASP ::: The photographer !!! There the F*** is he????””” He said “Oh man I guess he never shoved up. Let me call him” and I looked at us. We both looked like we were in a wrestling match. My hair was undone (also brown which was just strange) my dress had sleeves and it was ripped on the shoulder. He looked a mess! and I began to hyperventilate because I knew no one in my family or ourselves looked good enough to be in the wedding pictures. For some silly reason I felt that this situation was the worse thing that ever happened to anyone anywhere in the world. That’s when I woke up from the dream sweating, and breathing hard as if I was naked in front of a class room when suddenly psycho aliens started to chase me until I fell of a cliff. PANIC MOMENT 3
I have no idea why I’ve had this dream. I didn’t even realize I was worried about the wedding until my subconsciousness got my attention by scaring the wits out of me. Is this what I am looking forward to? Because if this happens often, I will be a nervous wreck and I doubt I will not be able to enjoy my wedding if I am twitching every 5 seconds from my nervousness. If this is a normal situation for the brides.. then how are the brides handling this?