Post # 1
I just got engaged last week and am really excited for this new step and to start planning. My Fiance & I will celebrate our four year anniversary this February and we are thinking about where we’d like to get married. He is from New Husband, I am from NY and we both live in Boston right now. We aren’t planning on moving for at least another 2-3 years so we originally thought a Boston area wedding would be best. However all of my extended family is from Washington, Oregon and Arizona so I’d like to evaluate all of our options before I start looking at venues (his family is all on the East Coast). We are thinking about next fall or a December wedding, we both have always loved those seasons and it gives us some time to plan.
I don’t think we’d consider getting married outside of the New England area but I have been considering doing a smaller wedding here and then a reception in Washington the following summer. I would love my entire family to come East for this event but it’s expensive to fly cross country and book a hotel for 2-3 nights and I want everyone to feel included. Would it be tacky to send out Save-The-Date Cards to my entire family and then get a ballpark number of who thinks they would be able to make it? That way I can anticipate whether we should do two events or not…
Ideally I’d like to have 120-130 guest in Boston and just do one wedding event but I feel like I need to be a little more flexible because I want to include as many people as possible.
Has anyone dealt with this before? What did you do?
Post # 3
I haven’t been in the situation, but I have close family who was, and they have all chosen to have just one event, I’m sure that is what I would of done too. Yes, travel costs are expensive…but not as expensive as throwing two events! Plus, someone will always feel left out for being the second party and not witnessing the real wedding.
But that is just my opinion, there are bees who have done two events successfully, maybe one of them will come on here and give you some advice.
Post # 4
My Fiance and I are actually in a very similar position. We decided on where we wanted to get married before he actually proposed; we did this so we made the decision that we wanted to do not necessarily what others wanted us to do. My family lives all over the place- NJ, PA, IL, CA, France and his family is mainly from NY. We have both been living in Boston for somewhere around 8 years. But because pretty much everyone would have to travel no matter where we got married, we decided to do a destination wedding in a place that means a lot to us- VT. It makes it easier because we can make it a weekend thing and very special. We’re planning to have around 130 people which will be nice and we’re also getting married in the late fall- 11.3.2012.
I think ultimately, you should think abouot what the two of you want- not necessarily what is easiest for others. Good luck!
Post # 5
Thank you ladies for the advice- I think we will ultimately go with the one big celebration and hope that giving everyone enough notice makes it easier to attend. Once we have a budget in place this will be a lot easier, right now I’m dealing with “fuzzy math” and just need something more concrete!
Vermont is a great suggestion I will have to checkout vendors up there to see what’s available
Post # 6
@BirdieBride21: I would check out these two venues….
Church Landing (not a church – just the name of the building) at the inns and spa at mill falls, Meredith New Husband (On a lake in a charming town)
Wentworth by the Sea (Close to Mass boarder and on the ocean next to portsmouth), New Castle New Husband.
Post # 7
@dfurst: thank you I will!