(Closed) Wedding marks 1 year after BM's father passed… should I acknowledge it?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: How should I acknowledge the situation?
    Don't do anything - it will only put a damper on their trip : (3 votes)
    5 %
    Send flowers and a card : (33 votes)
    53 %
    Send a bottle of alcohol and a card : (0 votes)
    Privately tell BM I'm thinking about her and her family : (24 votes)
    39 %
    Other - explain below : (2 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7647 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Tough situation. If you do anything, do it privately. Maybe a card or flowers.

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    899 posts
    Busy bee

    I agree, I would do something for them but privately. I’m sure they would appreciate a nice handwritten note and flowers.

    Post # 5
    Member
    1582 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I think a card would be just fine. I don’t think you should ignore it and I am sure your friend will appreciate that you are thinking about her on what must be a very tough day for her. That’s incredibly thoughtful of you.

    Post # 6
    Member
    3078 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I love the idea of flowers and a card.  I don’t think a bottle of alcohol would be appropriate.  It’s so, so sweet of you to think of them.

    Post # 7
    Member
    1274 posts
    Bumble bee

    I ditto the handwritten note and flowers. I think it’s very thoughtful of you and shows how much you care and are thinking about them. 

     

     

    Post # 8
    Member
    128 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I voted flowers and a card, with the card being the most important!  You should write the same things you wrote in this post about the point you are trying to get across.  I’m sure they would greatly appreciate your thinking of them.

    Post # 9
    Member
    3170 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I think it’s really nice of you to want to do something. Flowers to the room and a nice card is great. They will appreciate it.

     

    Post # 10
    Member
    5660 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @houstonwhodat:  Flowers in someone’s room is ALWAYS a classy move and will let them know that you are thinking about them and appreciate them being there. Don’t send alcohol, that IS crass just like you said. The only reason you send alcohol in remembrance of a death is to drink the pain away. Bad message! LOL

    Post # 11
    Member
    680 posts
    Busy bee

    I voted for the flowers too. Coming up on such an anniversary can be tough, and I’m sure they will greatly appreciate you taking the time to remember her dad. Healing from the loss of a loved one is a long and difficult journey, and it’s wonderful that you are thinking of them on your special day.

    Post # 13
    Member
    89 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I think maybe just a handwritten note and not flowers.  Something to keep it as private as possible.  I just look at it as she may get emotional if people coming in and out of the room want to know why she got sent flowers.  It would be kind of awkward explaining why and she could get upset having to be so vocal about it, rather than just having a private discreet note she doesn’t have to explain to anyone if she doesn’t want to.  

    Either way, it’s very, very sweet of you and you sound like a wonderful friend.

    Post # 15
    Member
    77 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I think flowers and note would mean a lot to them. That’s what I voted for!

    Post # 16
    Member
    89 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @houstonwhodat:  Ahhh I gotcha, flowers would be great then, as well.  I’m sure it would mean a lot to her either way 🙂

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