(Closed) Wedding or down payment on a house?

posted 6 years ago in Home
Post # 47
Member
3616 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

I would for sure buy the house.

But if a “wedding” has significance to you, I’m not sure that you can’t do both. If you drill down into what REALLY is important to you at a wedding (princess dress? nearest and dearest there to see you get hitched? photos of the moment you become a Mrs?) then you can decide how much that really costs.

You can do a wedding in a public park with tea and dessert reception very inexpensively. If you (the generic you) have only a rigid idea of what The Wedding must entail, then yes you will porbably spend $7,000 and then some.

Post # 48
Member
920 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

we decided to wait on our engagement and put the money towards our down payment and closing costs. it was a very practical decision for both of us. however with student loan payments, a mortgage and having to buy a new car, a wedding seems like it will never be feasible. it makes me frustrated every now and then, but then i sit in my perfect little house and realize that it will be worth the wait!

Post # 49
Member
166 posts
Blushing bee

i was just in this situation. My boyfriend and I chose to purchase a home (we actually close tomorrow) because we already have a child and need more space. I wanted to get married so bad but we couldn’t do both. Hopefully when the stress of this is over we’ll start saving for a wedding 🙂

Post # 50
Member
1990 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

We should have totally eloped…

I would love to be closer to buying a house than had the guestlist we had…

It was great and all but all we have now are the photos, vids and a few heirlooms.

We would have all that AND a house if we had eloped…

We could have had everyone over to our house for a recap of the photos and vids if we had eloped…. that seems like a much better use of the money if I do say so myself!

Oh well, we had a good time and that was our splurge year…

now its onto the years of save save save for our home.

Post # 51
Member
154 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Hey, 
 
As someone who is trying to do both – DON’T ( unless you are ok with compromise and not having the best of both). We are building our dream forever home right now and it is definitely affecting the wedding we will be having. It has been hard because I feel like I am always needing to give something up to be able to have something else. It is possible to do, and I am sure once both events are done we will be happy, but in the meantime it’s horrible. We made the decision to build the dream house and that is what we are really focusing on. I am still trying to come to terms that I will not be having my “dream wedding”. That being said – I do not regret our choice, given the option of a home to live in or a big splashy expensive wedding I will always pick the home. It just is not a easy decision to live with. As we are planning the wedding a common theme is – “well why would we spend that much on (blank) when we could use it for flooring/lights/sod etc”.
 
So I probably was not much help at all but I figured I would try to help. Long story short: A home is something forever, a wedding is one day and (just my opinion) its not the venue/meal/ or party that counts its marrying my best friend and getting to start a life together and live in said forever home.

Post # 52
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would choose the wedding (although I’m old enough and saved enough so I didn’t need to make that choice).  I have lived many places and it was really important to have everyone from all of those places come to my wedding and be a part of it.  I wanted to treat them well and take care of them while they were here.  I couldn’t go back and do this later – it’s a one time chance, while I could wait a little to buy my own home and rent a little longer.  (In actuality, Darling Husband had bought a place years prior though and I moved in with him prior to the wedding.)

I mean think about it – while sentiment here on this post seems to be to put the money towards the house, that’s not really what most people on the wedding board are doing.  Most are planning a wedding.  Some yes, are planning a wedding with financial assistance from family who wouldn’t give that money towards a house, but not all and I believe not even most.

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