Post # 1
I have dilemma with our wedding party. It is all a little fluid because we haven’t set a date for the wedding yet, but I like to plan ahead. I want to figure this out in my mind even if I don’t actually ask any of the people yet.
My fiance and I became friends because we hung out with a small circle of people throughout high school, and then throughout college, and still today. They are by far our closest friends, and they are all men (expcept me :)). These guys are GOING to be in the wedding party, no matter what.
My one close girlfriend is going to be my maid of honor, and my fiance has a mutual friend of ours, an ex-college roommate of his, that he says he thinks he will make his best man.
What do I do with the other 5 men? I don’t want to split them between us as it would be totally arbitrary and awkward, but I’m also not going to make them ushers or anything — I basically want them to be bridesmaid/groomsmen equivalents. What do you call people that are basically both bridesmen AND groomsmen? any suggestions?
Post # 3
I wouldn’t pick your wedding party until 9 months before you get married. I picked my wedding party 1.5 years prior and had a falling out with a friend who I wish would drop out, however I would never ask her to do so. You don’t necessarily have to have a wedding party. You could have Bridesmen!
Post # 4
You could just do Maid/Matron of Honor, Best Man, and then have the rest of the men be a generic bridal party, with a few on each side of you.
Ditto @orchid84: Take a few more months to choose, just in case!
Post # 5
Orchid, Thanks for the advice on timing. Like I said, I am not actually asking anyone yet. I am just trying to get things all laid out in my head. I am aware of the concept of “bridesmen” but I am trying to find a way that they would be associated with both of us, not just the bride or groom.
FutureMrsFitz, good idea…what would I refer to them as in the programs then?
Post # 6
We have 3 on each side(mine are all matrons of honor) then I have 7 honorary bridesmaids and he has 4 others as ushers. We are both 29, have lots of friends but realized that having a lot of
People standing up with us took away from us. Our lifelong friends are who’s up on stage with us and everyone else is serving as the honorary and usher. Everyone LOVED the idea! My honorary girls are picking their own dress in a specific colorant, will hav a flower pinned in their hair, and will be escorted down aisle by their spouses, when seating of family occurs and sit in row behind my parents. They’ll be in some
Group wedding pics as well! My Maid/Matron of Honor are in matching dresses and will be in all wedding group shots 🙂 when I was 21 I wanted 12 girls on stage with me, but as I’ve gotten older and been in and attended tons of weddings, I just realized that it was more about us than our friends. We are very Pleased with how it’s working out!