Wedding planning blues :(

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
2527 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

Take a break completely from planning for a few weeks. At a year out, you can still afford to do so at this point. 

Once you’ve taken a break, I would start back planning with something you really enjoy. Be it designing invititations, DIY’s…something that is special to you. 

Post # 3
Member
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2026

There is a good chance that not everyone who received a STD would be able to come, although a good majority most likely will. Luckily you don’t have to know the exact head count till it’s closer to your wedding. You can try skimping on other costs, though the bulk of it really is the guest count/food.  

I guess the lesson learned is to never let yourself be influenced by others if you truly do not want it. Also, it is also not too late to pull back and let people know that you will be doing a smaller wedding and no long accommodate them. As rude as it sounds, this is something you put yourself into and need to learn from for your own benefit.

Also! Never ever host a wedding you cannot afford ON YOUR OWN. That means, without anyone’s help including your fiance. If you don’t have enough money in your bank account to fund a 10k wedding, then you should hold off till you do. The end.

Post # 4
Member
3452 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

I’m going through this NOW. Nearly zero excitement left besides getting to see my parents and uncle that live out of state. I can’t stand all the planning and details, now have to DIY certain stuff out of necessity which really isn’t my thing and Fiance keeps adding to our agreed list of 40. Ready for this day to be over with…now and then I’ll picture it and feel a spark of happiness but I seriously wish we’d either eloped or had a very simple ceremony with parents, siblings and a cpl friends then gone out to dinner instead of having an *event*. I’m not dealing that well so can’t really help you there but hope things get better once you get most of the major items checked off your list and can relax a little.

Post # 7
Member
3452 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

weddingventing :  I change the subject when someone mentions the wedding. The most I’ll respond with is, “Everythings coming along fine.” I have no interest in talking about this stuff. 😕 No wonder you’re stressed. Triple the guest list and you pushed the date up. Was there any specific reason you changed the date? I’m just thinking that might make things a lot harder financially which is definitely stressful.

Post # 9
Member
3452 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

weddingventing :  Well that was pretty awesome. 😊 I would say cut the list down but you’ve already sent save the dates. I honestly wish we hadn’t sent those unnecessary things. Invites are enough. As long as you can afford the wedding without it being a major financial strain then try to focus on how you’ll feel that day and starting your life together surrounded by loved ones. A pp had a good suggestions. Take breaks when you can and then focus on what you like about planning. For me it was the website and personalizing save the dates/invites online. I think thats the main reason we sent the bloody things out! Was nice to finally have a part of this process not completely suck. lol

Post # 11
Member
3452 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

weddingventing : Since you asked for their addresses with the intention of sending them invites to your wedding I think you’re out of luck if they’re aware. In your case I still wouldn’t send them anything bc these aren’t your chosen guests and you’re paying for this yourselves but its probably considered rude, tacky or inappropriate according to etiquette (idk I can’t keep up with all the dumb rules). Why is your Future Mother-In-Law adding guests to the list? Is she contributing or covering their cost? 

Post # 12
Member
6600 posts
Bee Keeper

Girl I feel you. While I am looking forward to the wedding (and most everything is planned now), I’m more looking forward to it being over so we can get back to “regular programming” lol. I hate spending $ because I think “Oh this should go to the wedding…” and taking any time off sucks, because I’m already taking so much for wedding related things. We look at the budget and think of how we could have travelled europe for a few months instead of spending it on 1 day lol. *sigh*

Post # 13
Member
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

I know it. I wish we eloped instead of getting worn down by family

Post # 14
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: June 2017

weddingventing : The same thing happened to us. Our budget was $3,000 for us and family members and then it got out of hand with friends booking for our destination wedding. We’re now up to $10,500. What other people said, “It’s nice people want to be there.” This is true, but we are paying for our own wedding. If you want your wedding a certain way, definitely establish the rules in the beginning, something we didn’t do. It is what it is, and we’ll just go with it and have a great time. 

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