Post # 1
So annoyed!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!
Fiance and I are in a long distance relationship for a year and i know we are both sick of it. We got engaged in october and now we are trying to start wedding planning long distance and its like pulling teeth! I will be moving up there soon as I got a job offer last month but I may not get a start date until March and I still have to move!!
I am going to visut Fiance with my mom this week coming up so I can Reserve our Venue, try on dresses, visit my Maid/Matron of Honor, Look at apartments, Meet with a wedding planner, and ask his sister to be a bridesmaid.
Well Last night Fiance informed me *AFTER* we had already agreed on a venue and he shot down my first choices, that he didn’t know about the day we picked!….OMGWTF!
We had to nix saturday because of religious reasons on his side of the family. We couldn’t get sunday because the venue we agreed on is closed sunday, so we picked friday almost a month ago. Now i’m ready to go see the venue with him and he tells me that friday may not work because people work, and he continues to keep trying to add more people to our guest list when i continue to explain to him it will put us over budget! Then he gets an attituide! I tried to delegate him duties to do such as finding a pastor, DJ, and he gets mad when I ask him about it saying that we have plenty of time and i’m rushing!! Ive explained to him that people don’t wait until the last minute to plan large to moderate size weddings!
I’m trying my best to understand hes paying for half and its his day too but this indecisiveness and flip flopping is wearing me out! I also understand that this disagreeing is a “part of the process too sometimes” I dont even want a big wedding I wanted a small ceremony with 24 people and to go out to eat afterwards thats it! In the back of my head I keep saying to myself if he flip flops on one more thing I’m just going to refuse to plan anymore and put my foot down ! but I on one hand don’t want to be a brat, because i realize that if we don’t make plans then who knows what will happen and I don’t want to just refuse to have a wedding but i’m so close to telling him look ultimatium justice of the peace/ court house or small ceremony not doing anything else…..I know i’m venting can anyone relate?
Post # 3
Hey there…I know how you feel! I had some issues on things too. I really wanted to get married on a saturday, but the person who was deligated to reserve the venue within plenty of time, dropped the ball and all that was left were friday’s and for religious reasons weddings aren’t done on sundays. It was tough..it was either delay my wedding until the following month or take a friday. I spoke with my Fiance abou tthis and he said delaying any longer wasn’t an option, so lets’ do friday. That was months ago, the church and stuff was all booked and just now he’s saying he didn’t realize we were getting married on a friday. WTF!!! He doesn’t recall having this discussion at all! omg..lol. And there are some people who think they won’t make it to the ceremony, only the reception because of work and also I’m just finding out most people work on saturday morning where we are getting married….which I did NOT know about. I had everyone telling me that friday would work perfectly at first. Anyways, it’s done, there’s no going back but people just love to stress me out talking about it.
Every bride i’ve known who got married on a friday or sunday or even thursday said they dont’ regret it at all…and that it turned out fantastic. If people are given plenty of notice, they get off work early, or take the day off all together if they work on saturdya morning. If ur ceremony is late, that helps too. (mine is at 7pm, reception at 9pm)
So, just take things in stride…talk to ur fiance’ and tell him it will be okay so long as everyone gets notice. I had a cousin who got married on a tuesday and she had a fantastic turnout AND it was a destination wedding in Napa. It’s all about planning ahead and that doesn’t register for some guys. personally, I’m not allowing my Fiance to do much of the planning because he wouldn’t understand the urgency of getting hte big things out of the way.
I don’t know if you are on theknot.com but it’s got a cool tool that’s like a checklist that tells you by what time you should have different things booked/reserved. It really helps get things into perspective on what’s more important and what you should just hold off on. One thing at a time hon!
Post # 4
@fresitachulita: OMG that drives me batty !!! If we agree as a couple on what we want for a day and time why does it have to change because some random person disagrees or has a diffrent opinion ?? I mean the people that want to be there will take off work and those who don’t just won’t come oh well!
I just hate the idea that we are making decisions based on random feedback by people! i am trying not to stress about it but Fiance also just told me he doesn’t know if he will be able to take off work to attend the venue appointment….sigh… thanks for the check list idea I have been looking them up and once we get the venue reserved I think I will just back off for awhile until I move closer but its hard …I just don’t want to waste alot of time and have to rush later because hes a procratinator and i’m not.