Post # 1
I was an eager waiting bee, I was on the list, Any Day club and popped into the shut it up pact. So I sure was not expecting to say that I hate wedding planning. After enjoying engagement bliss for the last four months we finally decided to start planning. And it sucks.
After touring several venues and waiting on emails from others, and Future Father-In-Law sending me venue after venue to check out; I am seriously considering giving up on this whole planning thing. I know my fiancé wants the big party with all his friends he never sees but I am exhausted and not having any fun. It’s only been two weeks!!
Does it get fun or only get worse?
Post # 2
What exactly about it sucks? There are absolultey stressful moments trying to coordinate preferences and sticking to a budget, but I have honestly loved every minute of planning.
Post # 3
When’s the wedding? I was pretty excited to wedding plan when I first got engaged but the excitement burnt out quickly. I got to the point that my brain hurt from thinking about wedding thing.
My wedding is a little less than a year away, so I have plenty of time but I’ve learned that I enjoy the planning more when I take little breaks in between each project. I deliberately now will give myself 1-3weeks between each project and just focus on other things during those weeks. Then when I start on the next planning project I don’t feel so worn down!
Post # 4
It is fun at times, but frustrating at others. Picking a venue was the most frustrating part! Everything after that has been great!
Post # 5
- Wedding: May 2016 - Sussex, UK
I really enjoyed the initial stages of wedding planning i.e choosing venue, dress, my bridesmaids. I HATED the last month or so. Mainly due to guests being difficult because I didn’t invite their kids and just how busy I was with the details. In my case DH wasn’t interested at all in the planning so that didn’t help. I hate to say it but if you aren’t enjoying it now then I don’t think it will get better. Think about what you really want because planning the type of wedding you don’t want will be miserable.
Post # 6
I totally understand but it got better for me. Prior to getting engaged, I spent many hours over the internet planning my fictional wedding. I was convinced that I could invite like 200 people with food and an open bar for like $5,000. Oh silly me.
I first had to accept that planning a wedding can suck. My fiance and I get wedding fatigue where it becomes really stressful to even chat about the wedding. We designated a safe word which signals that we are temporarily changing the subject. I also found this website called “Plan the Day” that helps me organized. I had to find a system that worked for me. I had get off pinterest. I just sometimes need to complain. Good luck!
Post # 7
Why don’t you get your partner to organise the wedding instead? Might take some pressure off you. I am sewing our wedding outfits but besides that my partner is organising our whole wedding and one year honeymoon. I just show up 😜 My partner is excellent at organising parties and he’s a brilliant party host as well.
Post # 8
right now it’s mostly just the budget venue part. Future Father-In-Law hears the word budget and is now trying to convince us that knights of Columbus is the best because it’s $27 per person all included. But it looks like someone was murdered there.. I get that we don’t have a mega budget and he’s worried about our financials but I still want to have a nice party.
We had picked September 9th 2017 because it worked for our initial venue but she was jerking us around so much we are back on the hunt. I think I’ll find it fun again but right now it’s an overwhelming blur of ballrooms which aren’t our style and dingey crime scene-esque church basements.
ok so there is hope this is not a permanent state of overwhelming suckiness. Thanks.
I’m hoping once I pick the venue it will be fun again. I certainly foresee the kids fight. Since I have a little boy everyone assumes we will invite all their kids to the wedding but that’s a post for another time.
oh I already know we can’t afford our dream Pinterest wedding. The safe word is a good idea although I bet Fiance would abuse it, I think we need it more for our parents. I’ll have to check out that site. Thanks!
I totally had a dream I was on that British show were the groom plans the wedding. I know one thing for sure if I left it up to him- we would have great beer options. Other than that he is even more lost than I am. It’s like we both lack the party planning gene.
Thanks forr all the responses. I feel a lot better today. I think part of it is that every time I say ok I’m done. I don’t want to think about this wedding at all someone has some idea or venue for us to check out. I know they are excited and want to help but it’s killing the planning for me. I’m starting to think Future Father-In-Law is going to show up in a big white dress. 😂
Post # 9
I started to feel it sucks after about 3 weeks. We’ve still got a year to go before the big shindig and the October one is just about organised (still need to order food and decide how much to stick behind the bar, and invite people).
There is just so much pressure out there to have the perfect wedding, with the perfect pinterest worthy things, that must be DIYed.. I’m normally pretty immune to social pressure but it has started to niggle at me. Luckily my partner is enthusiastic about it all and I can hand him tasks. Sadly he can be a little too enthusiastic at times and starts asking our venue things before we’ve even talked about it between us, which can be a little irritating. But as he’s the one who is dealing with them (language barrier) then it’s up to him to own that shit. 0
Post # 10
What exactly are you looking for? Maybe we could help
Post # 11
I hope it was a quick engagement if it’s sucked since 3 weeks in! At least your fiancé is into it. Without that I bet it would be brutal. My fiancé is kinda into it some days it’s the last thing he wants to talk about. I know he’ll be able to handle every task I give him even if he’s not in the mood.
On the long ride home with my fiancé I told him there was one more venue that I was considering that had potential to fit the look and feel we want. This venue would have been at the top of our budget. We decided to go with the first one we walked into. It has a more casual vibe but still makes sense for a wedding.
I mostly wanted character. Exposed brick, barn beams anything like that. We want like a boho brewery feel. Everyone looks at is crazy when we say that. My dream location still hasn’t emailed me back so I’m just going to take it as some great holy sign that it isn’t meant to be.
Thanks for for all the help. I’m happy to have the venue picked now we just have to pick which weekend we want.
Post # 12
- Wedding: January 2021 - City, State
Google wedding planning sucks, it’s quite amusing
Post # 13
I found the worst part was finding out venue. I honestly thought I would never find one that we both liked… But we did… After 6 weeks of trawling the internet. It was painful, but once that was booked, planning was much easier.
Post # 14
Glad you found a venue you like! 😉
Post # 15
Eh I think you need to step back and figure out what about wedding planning sucks for you. If it sucks now, it will reflect the day of. Don’t stress over tiny details, don’t compress your time if you don’t need to and have a longer engagement, ask for help from your FH, don’t be “Wedding mode” 24/7, have hobbies outside of wedding planning as well.