(Closed) Wedding planning= tears

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 4
1555 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Just keep doing your research. You can pull it off, you just have to focus on the things that are most important to you. My husband and I pulled ours off for less than 5K and we still had a really nice wedding. Our venue was actually at a state park, we got married on a deck overlooking the lake. Look into places like that, places that may not be thought of as a wedding venue. Unfortunately, a lot of businesses charge more for the same things you could get any other time, just because “wedding” is attached to it.

Some ways we saved:

DJ – good friends of ours, DJ’ed for free

Photographer – I went with the cheapest I could find for the money, and he did a really good job. You may be able to find a photography student that could do a great job, as well. Or if you have a friend that is into photography.

Venue – state park, included catering in price. Much cheaper than a banquet hall, etc

Flowers – I put all the bouquets together myself. “real touch” flowers, made mine & all of my Bridesmaid or Best Man bouquets for less than $100

Hair – good friend of mine did it for $20. Once again, try a small business that needs the money rather than a big fancy salon

Make-up – did it myself. there are TONS of DIY tips on here, youtube, for make-up application. You have loads of time to practice, you can do it!!

I know how overwhelming it is.. we were on a budget, and got married 4 months after getting engaged. But it can be done! Please feel free to message me on here if I can help with anything.

Oh! another thing I did..made a lot of decorations myself. With a little creativity, you can make anything!

Post # 5
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

My Darling Husband and I had a lot of tiffs during wedding planning and it was over the wedding budget and whether or not we needed 100 guests, too.  We were able to keep it around the budget but it took a lot of planning and DIY-ing.  For the DIY stuff, I would suggest that if you have crafty friends, I would ask for their help.  I did a lot of the DIY myself and nearly lost my marbles. 

Post # 6
2286 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: Central Park

You do not have to feed people dinner. You can cut your food budget by doing a cake and punch reception, a brunch or lunch reception, or just heavy hors d’oruvres. That should help your budget. And for alcohol you can do just beer and wine or just a champagne toast. 

Post # 7
6 posts
  • Wedding: May 2013

@JessykaAddams:  Keep researching!  Look at wedding blogs, check message boards, examine magazines.  The good news is that you have time to look into ways to have a lovely ceremony/reception that will fit into your budget (it took me MONTHS to settle on plans for my elopement for two)Smile.  A lot of brides are in the same position you are in (given the economy and personal preference) so there is plenty of advice out there.  And always keep your eye on the ultimate goal: to marry the man you love (and have your family and friends celebrate this union with you).   And take some time to enjoy your engagement.  Congrats!

Post # 8
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Canal St Inn

Seconding PPs, especially roweboat, keep looking, you’ll find everything you need. I completely understand the urge to have everything look nice and everyone to have a good time. My family’s kinda fractured too, and extremely spread out.

But you’re not doing yourself any favors stressing about this. My wedding’s in New Orleans, which became kind of a wedding hotspot after I moved. It took me MONTHS of beating around the bush with venue owner after venue owner until I finally found an amazing bed and breakfast that was perfect for our wedding and our budget. Plus, you have plenty of time. Don’t panic.

If you’re crafty at all, try some DIY. I was certain whatever I made would never look as good as I imagined they would, and I have to say I really like how my personal flowers all came out.  If not, try etsy, wedding classifieds (the Bee has them, so does the Knot), and Recycled Bride to cut some costs.

As someone who’s having paper plates, and trust me I seriously considered renting wares, I think it’s really worth the convenience, especially if you’re on such a tight budget. Think of it as more money to spend on a ton of amazing appetizers. And there are very inexpensive printed/color paper plates that you can get to fit your color scheme.

Sometimes it seems impossible to pull it all together, but millions of people have weddings every year. You will too. Focus on the happy. 🙂 Hope you find everything you want.

ETA: Another thing I found helpful is setting up a budget. Some wedding websites have budget tools, but I tend not to like them because they’re a bit too rigid. A wedding planning book I found had a three page budget sheet in it that I filled out, balanced, and settled until our total matched the budget we had in mind. There may be some expenses that go over, but there will likely be many that are cheaper than you might have thought. All in all, it’s really helped me feel like we’re on top of things, and seeing the whole plan laid out makes me feel better when money anxiety kicks in.

Post # 9
1022 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

keep looking!  and don’t provide their alcohol for free. they can buy their own. that will tremendiously help the budget.

Post # 10
4687 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

What about just hors d’oevres?? Yummy little food with some booze, people will be happy!

Post # 11
195 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Don’t call it quits! I am also a budget bride (I’m getting my master’s degree, so not much money to spare!) Here is some of the ways we are saving:

Buy things a little at a time, and use coupons! DIY if possible! We wanted burlap table runners. To get them made would have been $500+ easily. Got a coupon for 60% off fabric, and made them myself for $80.


Photographer: A friend who is getting her photography degree. Maybe call some local colleges to see if you can connect with a photography student who is close to graduating?

DJ- No real good cheap alternative for this, we are biting the bullet and paying quite a bit

Venue- State Park! Beautiful outdoors, and pretty fully inclosed pavilion for reception

Flowers- Haven’t gotten this far, but I will probably use a coupon to purchase fake flowers and make them myself.

Food- Maybe only cater the meat, and have moms, grandmas, aunts help make the sides? Or buy in bulk from a local grocery?

Alcohol-We are having a friend bartend, and only providing beer and margaritas.

Hair- my friend just graduated from beauty school. maybe search for some in your area and set up a trial run to make sure the stylist you choose will be up to par?

Makeup- so totally DIY.

Groom- We are getting married in July. Outside. Its going to be a million degrees. He is not wearing a full tux, but kakhi colored linen pants, shirt, vest and tie. This is cheaper than a whole tux.


Other tips:

Use large tables if possible. Bigger tables mean less tables which means less tablecloths and centerpieces.

Keep bridal party small. Less people means less boquets/boutiners (I spelled that wrong…)

We aren’t doing wedding favors.

Buy a little at a time and use coupons or coupon codes when at all possible. It really does help.

We aren’t doing this, because we are using cupcakes that we are getting at a steep family discount, but buy a small wedding cake and suppliment it with sheet cake. Or, buy a big styrofoam cake (they look real and legit- google it) with only a real top teir for the “Cutting the cake” pics and use sheet cake for guests.

I’m sure I have more that I just can’t think of, so I will probably come back to add more! Don’t give up!!! (That being said, I have had my share of “we just can’t afford this!!! breakdowns” 🙂 

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