(Closed) Wedding Planning Without a Ring!

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
4090 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Hi there!


Do you both consider yourselves engaged right now?

Are you on different pages – aka you feel you’re engaged only after a ring, he things you are, but the ring is just fluff?

Many people get engaged without a ring.  I did once.

All in all, if you do not think you’re engaged right now, then yes it’s a little different/odd to be booking vendors. 

Post # 5
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

It’s more common than you think-I just went through this. My fiance said “let’s get married” in July after I moved in with him. We told our parents, all of whom were really interested in seeing us get married, and as a result of all those discussions we ended up seting the date and put the deposit down on the venue with no ring in sight. There are additional complicating factors in our case related to our religion-basically my in-laws insisted we get married on an “auspicious” date per astrological Hinduism. So when the wedding dates rolled in from their snakecharmer consultants, it turned out that we had very few dates available unless we wanted to wait till late 2013 for the stars to align (let’s not go there…they believe in it so we had to deal). That was unacceptable to both my parents and his, so we picked the first date that had good weather in India, which was February. 

So basically we planned our wedding with 5 months notice. It was difficult but doable. My fiance just gave me the ring last week-I think he was interested in waiting till our religious engagement in November but my mom, even with our wedding set and paid for, held off on telling her family because of the lack of ring. I found it hilarious-we are getting legally married soon, our wedding was planned in the space of a week (we’re fast movers) and everyone was so focused on a stupid piece of jewelry as the marker for the engagement. 

Post # 7
8066 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I did it!  We had both agreed what date we wanted, but we were waiting a few months to buy the ring.  Since I didn’t want to lose the date for a venue or photographer, I booked them before we announced it “officially” to everyone.  I did a lot of other stuff too: budgets, emailing, etc.  Though my parents and a few of my friends knew beforehand.  It did drive me crazy waiting to announce it since I felt like we were already engaged!  I only got the ring last week.

If you two have a date, then you’re engaged.

Post # 8
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I know, right?? To clarify, we are both Indian and Hindu but my fiance was raised over there and came here for grad school while I was born over there and then raised since the age of 2 in Canada and the US. My parents, while acting like they are totally into their culture are very Americanized in some respects and the astrological thing drove THEM nuts. My in-laws didn’t come out and say “have the wedding in India” but we knew they weren’t keen on having it in the US and on top of that there was the thing about having the date be set by astrology. 

Most of the dates they gave us were in April and May, which would have meant really bad weather in India (hot, humid). Finally they came up with one in February on the 2nd go round. 

I am so excited about our wedding but it’s a good thing I’m not overly detail oriented or interested in a theme or carefully thought out and personalized wedding-it will be beautiful but by the book because that’s what you can get done with 5 months to plan. Fortunately the location (by the beach in Goa) makes up for that. 

Post # 10
246 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

FH and I are planning our wedding without being officially engaged (he wants to wait until after he graduates this December). We’ve already selected our date, venue, and photography; the photographers’ deposit is going out next week!! 🙂

Post # 11
5191 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

I got engaged with a placeholder ring… that fit on my right hand pinky finger. It’s a piece of jewelry from Mr. LK’s parents (both deceased), so it is very sentimental. We just went ahead and announced the engagement to close friends and family. It was almost 2 months after the engagement before my ring was ready (custom design). In that time period we had booked our venue, I bought my dress, met with photographers, etc. No big deal.

Post # 14
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Wow, I could have almost written you original post… even down to the 3 & 1/2 years together, lol! We had to do the same kind of pre-planning because of work schedules. We agreed to go ahead & plan the “must have” items but I kept a few things sacred. For example, I held off wedding dress shopping until the ring was on. I also didn’t ask my BMs until after. It was nice because it left a few fun things to be excited about after the proposal!

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