(Closed) Wedding stats continue to plummet (Interesting Article)

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2512 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I honestly think you just said it all (and very well).

This is exactly the same reason I think divorce is more common. People were willing to put up with a lot more bullshit back in the day. It just isn’t happening now. 

Post # 4
Member
3788 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Your “selfishness” argument is not new, and there are better ways to say it that do not imply that women who no longer ascribe to the “retro” view you describe are now “selfish.” Anyway, that article is builty entirely on one study. There is an economic view of marriage, but that’s just one side of it. Also, there is a lot of evidence that delaying entry to marriage is not necessarily reducing the rate of people EVER marrying. A lot of the delay is related to overall trends in delayed entry to adulthood; that is, people are going to college and many are waiting to marry until after they graduate, establish careers, etc. It used to be that marriage was THE marker of adulthood, and now it is just one step (often a “capstone”) after other markers are achieved. And to be honest, that article has a fear-mongering tone of “oh noes, we’re not getting married anymore!” but I don’t see why that’s necessarily the problem they expect readers to just accept.  I bristle at any talk of the “decline in the institution of marriage,” which is sociology buzz talk for “let’s go back to the male-breakwinner/female-homemaker model,” which excludes families that do not fit that mold. 

If you’re really interested in the topic, I suggest readings by Andrew Cherlin, particularly The Marriage-Go-Round (in which he cites a study by Edin and Kefalas in constructing marriage as a capstone). He outlines the competing marriage culture in the US with our culture of individualism, which I think says what you wanted to say but with more depth.

 

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