(Closed) Wedding Website Turns Into Family Fiasco…HELP

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Appitizer, salad, and meat sounds like a meal to me!  I don’t think your guests will be hungry or disappointed!  If it isn’t costing him anything more, what’s the big deal?  I’d say keep it how you have it.

Post # 4
Member
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Hmmm… buffet style means buffet style.  I’m not sure why your Father-In-Law would think people would assume it’s a sit down dinner?  Why even tell the guests on your website whether it’s sit down or buffet? It’ll be a surprise when they get there. 

And, if you write “no formal dinner” and only “cocktail reception” people are going to think there isn’t going to be a dinner – only appetizers and drinks.  So, that is a definite NO.  Men don’t know anything.  LOL!  Keep it like you have it.

Post # 5
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

for me if its a “buffet meal” then you serve yourself and go sit down to eat it and i do not consider that a formal meal.  cocktail is when i stand around while waiters wander past with trays of tiny food

Post # 6
Member
3166 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

just change it to heavy hors dourves and be done with it – you have real things to worry about rather than semantics.

Post # 7
Member
3367 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I think ‘buffet style’ makes it pretty clear. 

Post # 8
Member
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@elliestan: But it’s not heavy hor dourves. They are having a real meal buffet style.  Keep it the way you have it!

Post # 9
Member
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Maybe he is worried that by saying buffet style it will be misconstrued as one of two thngs, 1) people can go back for seconds or thirds, or 2) that in his mind it sounds cheap…maybe you should ask him for more information on his feelings.

Post # 10
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I agree that if you just change it to “cocktail style” people may assume there is minimal food and eat beforehand. But for the sake of sanity and minimizing stress in your last month of wedding planning, I would try to find some happy ground. Maybe something like “cocktail style reception with buffet dinner”?

Post # 11
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I think what you have is fine, however are they making enough food for it to really be dinner? Maybe he knows something you don’t.

Post # 12
Member
3367 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

@MrsAlbright:  I think you solved it! 🙂

Post # 13
Member
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I wouldn’t put “no formal dinner” on there… If he’s worried about sounding cheap, THAT sounds cheap (IMO).  What’s wrong with saying it’s a buffet?  It sounds like a buffet to me… Also, why is FI’s dad so worried people will assume he’s paying for it? Doesn’t the bride’s family typically pay for food?  I would never assume the groom’s family was “to blame” or whatever he’s worried about. I don’t get what his issue is!

Post # 14
Member
4887 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

How about… ‘appetizers and dinner to follow” and leave the word buffet out of it completely, if that’s his beef?

Post # 15
Member
1231 posts
Bumble bee

This is why men shouldn’t get involved. They make problems out of nothing! lol I don’t understand his beef. You put buffet because that is what it is.

Post # 16
Member
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

Is the reception right after the ceremony? Just put ‘Reception Immediately Following’ and forget mentioning food at all.

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