(Closed) Wedding/Family drama [Long, sorry ): ]

posted 4 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
9145 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

Tell Brian you don’t want his money and that he needs to get his s#it together or bugger off. It sounds like if anyone should be not invited to the wedding it’s him.

Post # 4
Member
2073 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

What is it about weddings that seem to bring out the worst in some family members? I’ve never understood it. 

I don’t blame your man for not wanting to invite his drama causing father and sister. Is he close to them?  Or have they had a tempestuous relationship prior to your engagement?  If your fiancé is ok with the possibility of his relationship with each of them cooling off or being completely over with, then absolutely don’t invite them. His dad contributing to the bar would not be reason enough for me to invite him knowing he may make a scene. Do you have the money to cover the bar yourselves?  

Since they are his family, let your fiancé decide what he wants to do about inviting them. Support his decision but if he decides to not invite them, let him handle the issue with them on his own. 

Best of luck!  You are absolutely not over reacting. 

Post # 6
Member
186 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - The Gables at Chadds Ford

a co-worker of mine ran into a very similar situation when she and her husband were engaged.  He had a drama-queen sister who was impossible to get along with no matter how nice you were to her, and a mother and father who were both unsupportive to say the least.  Ultimately, those family members were NOT invited to the wedding.  The wedding was lovely and stress free without them there.  It’s sad there must always be some horrible family drama (we have ours too!), but you have to make decisions like this together.  Like another bee said about the bar tab-  tell your fiance’s dad to please keep his money because the last thing you want is him holding something over your head like that.  I would have an alcohol-free wedding before I let him help me financially. As far as your FSIL goes, it is not unreasonable by any means for you to not want her in your bridal party and clearly she does not deserve to be in it.  Just focus on yourselves and those who deserve a place in your life (and your wedding for that matter!)  Somehow things will all turn out fine in the end! 

Post # 7
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I would try to keep the focus on the love you and your fiancee feel for each other. People are always going to have drama when they are jealous. I dont blame you for not adding your sister in law into things. I think any woman would agree and im sure she would do the same to you if the shoe was on the other foot. This day is about you and what you guys as a couple want. Tell him how you feel and tell him your not sure how to react to it because you dont want him to make a quick decision then regret it later. Mostly be honest with him, thats the best thing IMO because you would expect the same of him.

Post # 8
Member
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

I have a somewhat similar situation, but not identical.  I wish you the best of luck.  I am still stressing about how it will impact us too.

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