Post # 1
My fiancee (I’m the groom) and I are not big dancers, and we’ve already decided not to do a father-daughter dance and mother-son dance. We’re also considering skipping the first dance, but I feel like that may not be fun for the guests.
So we’re considering an oddball idea: starting with a slow song (we’re thinking about ‘The Promise’ by When in Rome), then, about 1:30 into the song, we’d have the DJ do an abrupt cut into ‘Shout’ – the song by the fictional Otis Day and the Knights from Animal House (which is my favorite party song) and quickly waving all the guests onto the dance floor for a crazy jumping-and-shouting dance session.
Has anyone else thought of or tried this idea? We want to kick the dancing off with a bang, but I also don’t want to do something too crazy that will be off-putting.
Post # 2
Personally, I really love to hear Shout late in the night when the party is really going. People like to ease into dancing, and depending on your guests, you may not have many that join you immediately which would be really awkward. A lot of people do not like being summoned to dance either.
I would just enjoy the moment with your bride. Slow dance for that song and hold her tight. It will be such a whirl wind that day, and it’s nice to just be together for that song and soak it all in. You have the rest of the evening to get buck wild with your guests.
All that being said, I think some people could really enjoy it, but I vote no.
Post # 3
I think that’s fine but have ‘stooges’ ready to jump up when you say and dance and encourage others or else it could be awkward.
Post # 4
- Wedding: September 2017 - The Meadows
I went to a wedding where they did something similar. They had their slow dance, but they it cut in the middle to that Jump On It song and they did some goofy moves. It was cute and them, but they didn’t expect us to come out and dance. We hadn’t eaten dinner and it had just started, so I didn’t particularly feel it was the best time to do that.
Post # 5
Personally I will mentally thank any bride and groom who just don’t do a first dance at all. I find it irritating b/c I’m basically stuck watching when I’m bored out of my mind – can’t talk to people or leave the area without looking rude; must watch a couple dance and smooch and whatever else they do while I’m stuck there. So if you two really don’t want one, don’t have one. No one is going to be upset with you unless they’re nuts. (and yes, I’m a huge spoilsport)
That said, if you have the right type of group, your plan to encourage everyone (who wants to) onto the floor should work well. If you have the wrong type of group, your wedding party will join in out of obligation and 2 other people will join you and it’ll just look awkward. Know your audience and if it works, then have fun!
Post # 6
Thanks for all the insight everybody. I definitely don’t want to do anything that will make the guests feel awkward.
For what it’s worth, the dance will happen after dinner and in a different room (the dinner is upstairs in the main ballroom, the dancing is downstairs in the great hall). Also, the room is somewhat small, so all the guests will be standing right next to us (probably no more than 5 feet away. Finally, about 70 of the ~100 guests are under age 35, and they all like to party.
I agree with you about first dances. They’re often quite awkward, especially when the couple dances for 5 minutes while all the guests are still sitting and eating. However, I want to make sure people get out and dance, especially early in the evening. I imagine that as the night goes on, I’ll be outside on the terrace talking to guests, smoking to cigars and the like, so it may be tough to get a critical mass of dancers going as people start to spread out.
Post # 7
Giving this a bump since we’re so close to the wedding!
Post # 8
I say do it! If you know that people would go and dance, do it. Especially if you have a decently sized bridal party to help you kick things off!
Post # 9
- Wedding: October 2015 - St. Mary\'s Episcopal Church
We skipped the first dance and nobody missed it.
Post # 10
For our first dance we did something similar and did a medley of three short extracts of songs which started slow and got faster. We got the crowd up jiving for the second and third parts so people were only having to watch us for about 1.5 minutes. It was just after dinner but before people started drinking too much. It’s all about timing! I was dreading the first dance but because it was short and then loads joined in, it wasn’t as torturous as I had expected. Saying that, we knew our gang would be happy to get up and dance. As a PP said, it’s about knowing your crowd. Good luck!
Post # 11
At my friend’s wedding, they invited people who they knew would like to dance and party. Not everyone did, but the ones who danced were outgoing enough to pull almost everyone onto the floor, so it was amazing!
Are your guests partiers at all or are they the type to stay in their seats or awkwardly shuffle about?
Post # 12
I think it sounds like you guys want to do it, so go for it! As PPs have said though, definitely make sure that you have people on standby to join you or else it could be a pretty awkward moment. 😀
My husband and I did something similar – about a minute into our first dance (which we were both extremely nervous about!) we had the best man call everyone onto the dance floor, as the DJ switched up the tempo with a faster tune. It worked well and got a nice dancey atmosphere going.