Post # 1
I know it is a bit of an odd question. Darling Husband and I plan on having kids and TTC in a couple of years. In the back of my mind, I have always worried I might get postpartum depression since I have a history of depression in my family. Apparently, my husband has thought of it too because he casually mentioned over the weekend that he’d have to watch me closely for signs of postpartum depression. He knows about my family history of mental illness (my mom was very emotionally unstable during my childhood and my older sister is currently battling mental illness). It could also be because when I miscarried 2 years ago (unplanned pregnancy) I was very depressed afterwards.
It’s not that it bothered me to hear my husband say it but, I do feel bad that we both are worried this could happen with hormonal changes from pregnancy/giving birth.
Do any of you bees think you’d have a high likelyhood of suffering from postpartum depression? If yes, why?
Post # 2
So, I had PPD with both children- worse with my first (son) than my daughter, but pretty bad both times. I have no history of diagnosed depression, but in hindsight, probably had struggled with mild depression a little over the years. I essentially attempted to ignore it with my son, and it almost killed me- with my daughter, I was open, honest, talked a lot about my feelings etc. and have been able to mostly feel “normal” again- she’s 4 mos old. So, while I didn’t worry about it beforehand, I had it- had it bad. And it happens a lot. I think it’s outstanding that you’re talking about it now. Keep talking about it. And talk about it with anyone you feel comfortable- I think you’ll find a lot of support and help (if you want/need it).
Post # 3
I have gad and had to go off of certain medications when I was pregnant. The hormones actually agreed with me, I was the calmest I had ever been during pregnancy and breastfeeding. A few months after I stopped breastfeeding, the anxiety came back in full force.
My now husband and I were also worried, however, I didn’t have any problems.
Pay close attention to how you are feeling. You can also sign a release with your psychiatrist to have your husband be able to call and discuss any concerns that he might have, if you aren’t being receptive to what he’s seeing. I signed the consent and it made us that much more prepared for any potential problems.
Communicate with each other and pay close attention to how you are feeling. Reach out to your doctor if you feel like you aren’t doing well.
Hopefully you won’t have any issues but this is so good that you are thinking of the possibilities
Post # 4
I am in the exact same boat. Family history of PPD, my own personal history of OCD and anxiety disorder, thinking of TTC in a couple of years and I just know I will suffer in the months immediately after… it’s scary…
Post # 5
I don’t have a history of it in my family but I get very emotional and sad when I’m home too much by myself which I feel could lead to PPD with a baby. I’m one of those people that would still work even if I won the lottery because I need it for my mental health or else I don’t feel fulfilled. Dh and I have also discussed this because obviously I’d have to be on maternity leave for 12 weeks and he commutes so the wait for him to get home every day will be an hr. It already gives me anxiety thinking about it because I get restless as it is without a kid I just don’t get depressed. I just find stuff to do whether it’s errands or cleaning the house or something.
Post # 6
I worry about it. My sister had PPD and I had no idea; it upset me that I hadn’t noticed signs or didn’t help her more. She will open up and talk about it now that she has recovered. There was also a local mom who committed suicide due to PPD; again no one noticed many of the signs. Everyone just thought she was tired.
My Fiance and I have talked about it, he knows my concerns, we’ve gone over signs and symptoms and I know he’ll keep a close eye on me. Got to watch out for each other 🙂
Post # 7
I worry a bit, as my mum had it, but my family and I are so intimately familiar with depression my family would spot it in a heartbeat so I guess I’m just relying on them to tell me if I need to see someone.
Post # 8
It’s one among my list of reasons why I do not ever want to be pregnant or have children. However, if it was my *only* reason, it probably wouldn’t be a dealbreaker. I think that if kids are something you truly want in life and you will not feel fulfilled without them, you would be doing yourself a disservice to avoid it out of fear.
I think it is smart and responsible that you are both taking this into account and choosing to keep an eye on your mental health when you do TTC, become pregnant and give birth. It’s important that your husband is as invested in your wellbeing as it sounds like he is, because if you do end up suffering PPD, you may not be in the right headspace to recognize it for what it is and he will need to step up to the plate and push you to get the help you need.
Try not to focus too much of your emotional energy on the what ifs. If it happens, you are prepared to deal with it as is your husband. That’s as far as you need to go with it ATM.
Post # 9
bettydraper23 : I had a history of anxiety and depression. We watched the documentary (On Netflix) called “When the Bough Breaks” and talked about being on top of it. I did fantastic for months after she was born. We did breastfeed which initially was a struggle then it saved me during my rough patches and hers. I will say that I 100% believe my struggle after her birth was directly related to going back on hormonal birth control pills. I got really bad, suicidal thoughts, self-harm etc. I quit my birth control and within a week was back to myself. So if you struggle I would try either going on or off hormonal birth control to see if that helps. CBD oil was also massively helpful for my panic attacks.
Post # 10
It’s something I worry about a lot. My brother has diagnosed bipolar disorder and GAD, and I’ve watched my mom struggle with depression & anxiety since I can remember. I’ve never been diagnosed with depression, just anxiety after my divorce, but I’m terrified that having a baby will be the trigger for me.
Post # 11
I have a history of panic disorder and depression, and I assumed I would have PPD after my son was born. Much to my surprise, I didn’t. I think it was helpful that my past experience made me aware of what signs to look for… I was amazed when I didn’t see any of them! Hope you have the same good luck!
Post # 12
Definitely in the same boat, and very frank about it with Darling Husband.
He knows that I anticipate needing to lean on him a LOT pp, and he knows that there’s a rather high chance that I will not be my typical self.
I’m pretty sure my own mom is bi-polar, and I have struggled with depression in the past. I also suffer from SAD, but that has been nonexistent since moving to my current sunny city 4.5 years ago.
For that reason, we are going to target a birth in the late winter, spring, or summer so that I can have plenty of sun and warmth immediately following the birth.
I can already anticipate that having a baby October-December would not be great for my mental health and am going to take a break from TTC (if necessary) January-March for that reason.
Post # 13
I’m 17 weeks pregnant and this is something I’m very worried about. I have suffered from mild depression in the past and saw a counselor for several months earlier this year. I also tend to get seasonal affected disorder in the winter, which can make the depression worse.
Our baby is due on Jan 1. When I was about 6 weeks pregnant, we moved to a new place – with really bad winters – for my husband’s job. We will only be here temporarily so I’m not working while we are here. We are far from our families and support network.
I’ve already talked to my ob about this and Darling Husband has suggested that I should find a therapist here to start seeing so that I am comfortable with her in case I need extra help after the baby comes. I’m glad he’s as concerned about it as I am.
Post # 14
I have definitely worried about this too. I’ve been clinically depressed on and off since I was about 12 and have ADHD. They’re both totally managable with meds, but I won’t be able to take them when I’m pregnant/nursing. I also have serious sleep issues and haaaate driving. Also none of my friends are having kids and I don’t think I’ll like mommy group type things.
Soo basically I’m really afraid that I’ll be getting 3 hrs of sleep a night, won’t be able to keep my shit together because of the ADHD, AND will self-isolate since I’ll be afraid to drive with the baby and my friends will all be busy – all leading to a whopping helping of post partum. It’s a big part of the reason I’m still putting it off..
Post # 15
I literally could have written this exact post- right down to my husband saying he’d have to watch me closely for signs of ppd. As it turns out I didn’t have any ppd and felt amazing after my delivery (probably from hormones and delivery went really well). I also arranged to have a lot of support post partum including help from my husbands family and his own month long paternity leave – I swear this helped a ton! Keeping this an ongoing conversation should help manage it if it does happen. I think what is important to remember is that it is totally treatable so you don’t have to be scared.