Post # 1
We’ve been together for 3 years and have spoke about marriage and getting engaged quite often. It just seems whenever a wedding or someone getting engaged on TV shows up, I turn to look at him and he will turn to look at me… I can’t really describe the face he gives me… sort of ” I know you want to get engaged, and irritated that I haven’t asked”. We have also fought about this because he wants to give me “the ring I deserve” and I would rather he propose then wait however for a ring. Just today, a pair of ex- coworkers just got engaged. So I brought it up with him and he said ” oh yea, hint hint. ‘Eh? ;)” Then I replied and his answer sort of went off topic… So I’m not sure if he is planning to ask soon? I looked back at an e-mail from August of last year and he wrote: “Well then I would have to wait till next winter though. Would that be too long to wait? It would be past our 3rd year.“
In that e-mail, I told him how I wanted to have a winter engagment. Since then though, he had to use that money for other expenses… So, any help would be appreciated
Post # 3
instead of having “looks” and “glances” and hints and emails from last year……. I think you should have a frank, adult discussion.
Ask him what his goals are for the future. Ask him if he wants to get married and what HIS timeline looks like. Ask him if he knows what kind of wedding he wants…. as far as budget, scale, location etc. Ask him about kids…. and what his plans are.
You share this info as well…. see if you are on the same page.
Then you can stop being in the dark and wondering what he’s thinking. These are decisions that the TWO of you should be making about YOUR life together.
Stop talking in generalities and kid-speak. and have an adult conversation.
Post # 5
@3xaCharm: Agreed. Getting married is an adult desicion and warrents an adult coversation.
From the sounds of it, you seem fairly young? Just because you’ve been together 3 years does not mean you should be getting engaged/married around now. Everyone’s relationships move at different pace. If your Boyfriend or Best Friend seems to be avoiding the subject it could mean that he’s not ready to propose and is doing his best to prevent another fight. Personally I take a guy saying “I want to give you the ring you deserve” as code for saying “I am not financially ready.”Just wondering though, do these conversations take place via text? (the way you wrote his response implied that this one at least took place via text)
Honestly though, what I don’t get, is you wanting a winter engagement. The engagement is only a quick blip in time, and yes, you want it to be memorable, but I wouldn’t specifically have asked my Fiance to hold off on proposing until a specific season. You can always have winter e-pics taken.