(Closed) well now I feel like the biggest d***. Someone rvspd 5-but it was addressed to 2

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Well, you’re not a dick for sending a properly addressed invitation…she’s the dick for assuming her children were invited. Just expain the situation.  If she cannot come without them, tell her you can recommend a good babysitter (and then call Kristy!).

Post # 4
Member
205 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

That was kind of rude of your Maid/Matron of Honor to message you that. I would just email or text your cousin and let her know that it is an adults only ceremony and no one else will be bringing children and you hope she and her husband can make it 🙂

Post # 5
Member
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Oh, wow.

It stinks that she isn’t just respecting your wishes and going along with it, but that’s just the price you pay when you make different choices for your wedding I guess. Not allowing kids is bound to ruffle some feathers.

I would be honest with her and explain briefly that you are having a child-free wedding because it would be costly and you do want the parents to be able to enjoy themselves. <– Or something like that?

Post # 6
Member
46415 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would tell her just what you told us- that you are at capacity and you want to have those who are most meaningful to you attend the wedding.

 

Post # 9
Member
909 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Honestly, this sounds likes something my crazy cousin would pull as well. 

You’re not the dick — stick to your guns about this, just tell her exactly what you’re saying here — that you’re at capacity and that no one else is bringing their kids. 

Post # 10
Member
46415 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Leemarie:  then I would respond ” We understand if you are not comfortable leaving the children either at home or with a sitter and we will miss you at the wedding”.

Post # 11
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Wow. Wonder if she doesn’t talk to the rest of the family, you know all the OTHER people who are leaving the kids at home?

Seems if she had communication with other family members who are ok with this, then she would be, too. 

 

 

Post # 12
Member
832 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: Either Philadelphia City Hall or a small chapel.

@peachacid:  Exactly. Unless it says “and girls”, “and family” it usually means they’re not invited. Then again, there’s been times where the invitation was addressed to just my parents and the hosts  asked where me & my sisters were. If in doubt, call. 

Post # 13
Member
205 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@Leemarie:  ah gotcha 🙂 then your cousin was rude, lol

Post # 15
Member
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’d offer to provide a sitter and if she doesnt’ want to take you up on that offer, too damn bad – she doesn’t have to come.  I cannot standdddd people that make an issue out of no kids.  I’m sure they have NO problem leaving the kids home with a sitter for a date night.  I’m sure her husband has some trusted family member they can leave the kids with, or bring along with them to watch them.  I’m also sure she at one point (before having mom brain) wanted a no kids wedding.  

My wedding is in a hotel, so really no one can make some excuse about being uncomfortable with the babysitter situation – it will be someone my family has known for years (likely more than 1 babysitter) and in a room in the hotel 2 minutes away where you can easily check on your kids.

Post # 16
Member
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

and putting no children allowed would have been rude – you totally did the right thing with your invites! 

The topic ‘well now I feel like the biggest d***. Someone rvspd 5-but it was addressed to 2’ is closed to new replies.

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