(Closed) well the shit has finally hit the fan with my fi and his best man!!!

posted 11 years ago in Grooms/men
  • poll: how do i handle this situation?

    let it go..what happens happens...

    try to fix it (my fi is thickheaded and doesnt care to)

    mend whats left of the friendship no matter how rude and condescending he is

    end the friendship..its been a long time coming anyway

  • Post # 17
    Member
    3993 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I think we all have/had those “friends.” At some point this will probably end, being that you find them so selfish, tactless, etc etc. (And yes, they do sound it, but I wouldn’t know). I guess it’s more of a “do we end it now or do we wait it out?”

    Personally? I’d be done. I had a toxic friend for years (actually, toxic couple) and there was the straw that broke the camel’s back and so on, and I am soooo much happier not having to worry about Mr & Mrs Drama. It’s been 2 years and I don’t regret my decision at all. Not trying to persuade, nor am I even saying I’m “right,” but that is how it worked for me and my experience.

    Post # 18
    Member
    1529 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    It is hard to say without hearing their side of the story. I have to say though, that some of what you have posted makes it sound like you are a wee bit jealous of the fact that their wedding is being paid for by their parents and you are paying for your own. Why is it spotlight stealing if they are getting married two months after you? You have been engaged for 2 and a half years. That is a really long time. Did you expect that they would also wait two and a half years to be married?

    It sounds like there are faults on both sides and you would benefit from sitting down together and hashing it out without letting petty jealousies come into it.

    Post # 19
    Member
    50 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    @plantains: I totally agree.  This comes across as a twinge of underlying jealousy towards the newly engaged couple. 

    OP, forgive me, but to me it sounds like you feel that alot of what they are doing is for attn seeking purposes.  Could it be that they are excited about being engaged and planning wedding?  Just a thought.

    I know it sucks having to save and pay for a wedding for 2.5 yrs just to see the 2 ppl that you and Fiance brought together get engaged and accelerate quickly towards the altar, all expenses paid.  Heck, I’d be Yell too, BUT, perhaps consider taking a step back and looking at things objectively and see where you may be reading a bit too much into things.  If you still feel the same, then, I say screw it.  Sever ties and move on.  Not every friend will you take with you into the next stage of your life.  Sounds like it would be a headache and lotsa stress continuing to deal with them in the long run, given her expressed feelings of them.

    Post # 21
    Member
    3993 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    @julieandjaiden: I didn’t think you were saying you were jealous. I think you’re saying your friendship is falling apart. Is that accurate?

    Post # 24
    Member
    3993 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    @julieandjaiden: I’m glad you got some closure and got it figured out, in whatever way works best. Good luck with your wedding.

    Post # 26
    Member
    3993 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Yeah. I’ve had a similar (though non-wedding related) experience and I have to admit, I don’t regret it at all. Not that that means no one regrets these things, but to share an experience, I really reallly don’t. lol. I’m so happy to have less drama consistently in my life. 🙂 I hope you find the same peace of mind about it, and it sounds like you are starting to.

    The topic ‘well the shit has finally hit the fan with my fi and his best man!!!’ is closed to new replies.

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