(Closed) Welp, my FMIL bought her dress for the wedding…

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 19
Member
1271 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Haha, I agree with the other posters that I wouldn’t say a word and let her look absolutely ridiculous the day of the wedding. 

I helped my mom shop for her dress for my wedding.  She bought it.  I found out from my sister a couple of weeks ago that she secretly returned it and bought a different dress (that is godawful ugly, according to the pic my sister had of my mom in it) that she hasn’t told me about.  Meh.   She’s going to look bad in pictures and I don’t care.

Cest la vie! 

Post # 20
Member
5072 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

Reminds me of that SYTTD episode where the mom bought the same dress as the bride but had it dyed blue.  She looked like an idiot.

Post # 21
Member
2142 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

What’s the style, can you post a picture? Like is it very bridal-looking?

Post # 22
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I understand your pain 100%! My Future Mother-In-Law bought a david’s bridal BRIDESMAID dress to wear to our wedding from a thirft store because it was a “great deal.” It is actually too small for her even, but when I suggested she get something to match with my mom, she flipped out, saying that she asked what I wanted and I said nothing in particular because we were 11 months out from the wedding.  To top it off— it’s the floor length version of my bridesmaids dresses because.. hello.. it’s a bridesmaid dress from the same manufacturer. She knew I was using davids bridal.

FMIL’s Dress (in Pistachio.. also too light for a very formal evening wedding. Also she has giant boobs so this is going to be a trainwreck): http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Sleeveless-Satin-V-Neck-Dress-with-Slim-Skirt-81047_Bridal-Party-Bridesmaids-All-Bridesmaid-Dresses

Bridesmaids dresses (in horizon): http://www.davidsbridal.com/Product_Short-Sleevess-Satin-Dress-with-Ruched-Waist-F14823_Bridal-Party-Bridesmaids-All-Bridesmaid-Dresses

I don’t know if my advice will help you, but I came up with an EPIC compromise with Fiance… She MUST go dress shopping with me and Fiance closer to the wedding just to ‘look’ at backup dresses. The #1 reason she is sticking to this dress is that she’s convinced herself that it’s the only dress that will ever look good on her. At the end of that shopping trip, she does not have to buy a dress. We will go to 3 stores (Nordstrom’s, Macy’s, Penney’s) and end at David’s Bridal and look at their MOG/MOB dresses. She will be required to buy a jacket to cover up with us at the David’s Bridal. She already said she wants to cover up more.  She’s talking about wearing a bright purple shawl. Hell to the no. She’ll look like barney (green dress, purple shawl) and it won’t cover her tits. The compromise is that, if she does that- buys the jacket, LOOKS at dresses, she gets to walk Fiance down the aisle. If she wears a shawl, she does not get to walk down the aisle (isn’t traditional anyway), but rather, when he’s at the front, she stands up and gives Fiance a hug.  If she refuses to even go with us or even try to work with us, throws a fit, or refuses to attend the rehearsal or rehearsal dinner, she gets nothing. No walking, no hug, no nothing.  We are not telling her about this plan, but we’re making it as easy for her to work with us as possible.

Whew.. this ended up a lot longer than I meant. Why do FMILs have to suck so much?

Post # 23
Member
1493 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

My mom wore a beige dress that she wore to my brother’s wedding 4 years earlier. It looked great on her. I had no problem with it.

Post # 24
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Personally I think it’s a really smart neutral colour really so I wouldnt worry about it.. now if it was a BLACK dress, that would be a major issue

Post # 25
Member
2203 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

She’s looking for a reaction, don’t give it to her.

I would say no to the returning of the tie- pull the “we bought especially for him for the wedding and it will be so perfect” or something like that. Make her the bad person for asking to return it.

At the wedding- she will look like the bad person. TRUST ME. I’ve seen it happen. The person that wears ivory or very, very light colors, looks like a jerk or a moron. ESPECIALLY if it’s the Mother-In-Law. You just have to trust me on this, people will notice and judge.

But don’t give her ANY reason to talk badly about you. She’ll pull the “My future DIL doesn’t like my dress/ is a demanding bridezilla/ whatever.”

Take the high road, don’t give in to her demands. If you start giving in (like returning the tie), you are setting a precedent for future interactions with her.

Post # 26
Member
2203 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Just another quick thought- is your wedding outside? She might be paranoid about sweating and wants a light color to handle it better.

Post # 27
Member
5072 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

can we see a pic?

Post # 28
Member
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

If this helps my Step Mom wore ivory/beige to my wedding (and my step-brother’s wedding as well) and my Grandma wore white slacks. I didn’t really care for my wedding, in fact I was there when they picked out their outfits. Obviously you are bothered by it, and I can understand why, but you might end up causing more ripples by calling her out on it. My Future Mother-In-Law picked out her dress 1 YEAR before the big day–before my mom even got a CHANCE to think about her dress. This was right after my Future Mother-In-Law made a big deal about the brides mother being the first mother to pick out a dress when my sister-in-law got married. I was offended but I just let it go. It wasn’t worth the headache. I’m sure you will look amazing and will outshine anything that anyone else wears!

Post # 30
Member
296 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
@MrsBroccoli:  I about peed myself laughing at her entire reply.  Love the very last line.  LOL

Post # 30
Member
296 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
@MrsBroccoli:  I about peed myself laughing at her entire reply.  Love the very last line.  LOL

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