(Closed) Went 0-60 with LDR and now he wants to slow down…Help!

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Should I move on and chalk this up to experience?

    Move on, you deserve someone who can give you all that you want.

    Give it a set amount of time and see if he warms up again.

    Keep talking to him when he initiates but secretly move on with your life and date around.

  • Post # 2
    Member
    1671 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

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    lexiebean24:  Setting up visits etc is EXACTLY what people who are serious about the relationship would do. I was long distance with my husband for 5 years except for summers. (He was away at school.) We visited every few weeks and talked for about an hour every night. It sounds like he will probably just string you along until he finds a suitable partner closer to home.

    It sounds like what he’s offering is not really what you want. I’m sorry. 

    Post # 3
    Member
    5517 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2019 - Paris, France

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    Fizzy8:  I agree.

    I feel like 0 to 60 is natural when you are falling in love with someone. If he is unsure ..its because its not his ideal. It really does sound like he is stringing you along.. which is really painful. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    6397 posts
    Bee Keeper

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    lexiebean24:  I would move on.  I know that’s not what you want to hear, but I think this guy isn’t really ready to commit.  My husband and I went 0-60 as well, but two years later we’re still together.  Some couples are meant for this and some aren’t.  I think your boyfriend was ready but then got cold feet.  I would move on and find someone else who understands exclusitivity and doesn’t slow down like your previous one.

    Post # 6
    Member
    5892 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

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    lexiebean24:  You are either exclusive or you aren’t. Don’t be a liar and a cheat just because you are insecure. What you can say is, “I understand that you want to take it slow. I agree that things went too fast. But I’m uncomfortable having a “boyfriend” that only wants to talk a few times a week and only see me every couple of months. Let’s take a step back. You keep dating other people, I’ll keep dating other people and we’ll keep dating each other. We’ll see where this goes.”

    Post # 7
    Member
    3584 posts
    Sugar bee

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    lexiebean24:  I’d move on. Find something local. It sounds like the long distance thing is not for him. He probably enjoys talking to you but it’s probably to much work for him. after so many months he is having to work hard to see you. Spending money and booking flights, it’s probably just getting to him. If i didn’t love my Fiance i would have left him the moment we started a LDR. It’s really easy to drift apart once you have been separated for so long. If you care though you remember why you are working so hard to keep the relationship going. I haven’t seen my Fiance in 7 months but i won’t let that mess with our relationship. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    2762 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    What 

    View original reply
    KoiKove: said x a million.

    The topic ‘Went 0-60 with LDR and now he wants to slow down…Help!’ is closed to new replies.

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