Post # 1
- Wedding: May 2016 - Sussex, UK
So I have quite an aversion to having my photo taken. I realise I’ll have to get over this by the time our wedding comes around!
Anyway, at the recent weddings I’ve been to there were photos and videos that had been posted to Facebook etc during the day so people were obviously posting them during the reception. One couple sent a Facebook message out asking if people could tag them in the photos so that they could see them before they were posted. So many people went ahead and posted them without tagging them. The bride looked beautiful on the day but there were some less than flattering photos (we’ve all had those ones where they haven’t been taken from the best angle, you are blinking or whatever) and she was quite upset that they’d been posted.
Do you just accept that a lot of guests will do this? I know it’s nice to have some shots that the photographer might not capture but for someone who is camera shy this doesn’t fill me with joy.
Post # 2
I don’t think you can control what your guests do. Unflattering photos are a part of life, I’d rather have photos of me having a good time than stiff photoshopped portraits.
Post # 3
I would haaaaate this to happen. I will ask my guests on the wedding website (and remimd them the day befote)o send all pics to us (cause I would want to have a copy of all the pics anyway) and we will make a huge folder of weddkng ohotosnon FB and tag everyone who wants to be tagged. OR we might het a file share to have everyone out they fotos in so everyone at the wedding can see all the pics, and from there we would chose which to put on social media. I would hate seing picks of myself at i hate (blinking, bouble chin etc) all over FB for the world to see, and obviously I would have 0 control over it once it’s out there… since we are planning a Destination Wedding and guest will be taking photos on their vacation and posting it that’s one thing, but posting pics of my wedding is is not cool. I just hope they don’t have good wifi in Cuba (as they didn’t this summer) so people will be less likely to do this.
Post # 4
You can adjust your settings on FB to approve tags/posts to your wall before they go up. I’d go for that route.
I thought about some level of “unplugged”… but I would rather have extra photos from other angles that are instantly available to me. And what if something happened to your pro photos or a moment gets missed?
I think its a bit controlling to decide who takes what pic and posts what to where and when. You just gotta trust people not to be asshats. Its not like im Kimye lol, no need to ban phones/cameras or anything like that.
Post # 5
You can’t control what others will do. The only thing that you can do is to adjust your settings so that you have to approve any photos that you are tagged in. But if people don’t tag you and just post them to their own timeline, then it is something that you just need to accept.
And like somethingbee said, unflattering pictures will happen and will be posted. 99.9% of the time people aren’t posting those pictures to be hateful. I think that the bride in your example is a bit of a pain in the ass. Yeah, it sucks having a not so great picture of yourself to be put on facebook, but to get super upset about it is a bit much. Learn to laugh at yourself and realize, even as a bride on her wedding day, you won’t always be captured looking fabulously.
Post # 6
- Wedding: May 2016 - Sussex, UK
somethingbee: Our pro pics won’t all be posed and guests can take photos of course, I’d just like to see them first!
Post # 7
- Wedding: July 2014 - Presque Isle
We asked that they not post anything on Facebook until we did. We only had parents and siblings present for our small beach wedding so it was a bit easier to control. Everyone ended up arguing, so I’m sure that helped with keeping our pictures off of social media until we wanted to announce to our friends we tied the knot. We married 6 weeks after being engaged because of health issues with my Dad.
Post # 8
You can’t tell people not to post photos. Think of all the unflattering photos that are already all over Facebook. If YOU don’t want to see them then delete your Facebook but you can’t tell adults what they can and cannot do with the images they took at your wedding.
Post # 9
We had people posting pictures and for me it wasn’t a big deal. I am very active on social media. I had one moment of panic though. My cousin was our flower girl and my aunt took a picture of us together while we were all getting ready. We were both already in our dresses and it was a super cute picture and moment. Not long after she takes the picture my phone dings that my aunt had tagged me in a picture! I freaked out!!!!! It turns out it was just a picture of my cousin in her dress and not me at all. I thought she posted a picutre of me before the ceremony and before my Darling Husband had even seen me!
Post # 10
I really don’t have a problem with it. I don’t plan on advising people to not post pictures. It just seems completely rude and vain to me. “Hey, I only want my good side on Facebook and nothing else because I’m not comfortable in my own skin, so don’t post pics.” It’s just not me. I’m sure there will be some doozies, and poses where I will probably look like a moron, but I’m okay with that. Long as there are none of me on the potty, I’m good to go.
Post # 11
- Wedding: September 2015 - Historic Chapel
EllyAnne: I honestly didn’t care, there were pictures posted on fb right after the ceremony, our families couldn’t help themselves! Lol and yeah there were some pics where I didn’t look my best, but there were others where i looked amazing.
Post # 12
I plan on telling my guests that if they use Instagram to use a certain hashtag, but otherwise…whatever! I’m sure some unflattering photo of me or my Fiance will show up on Facebook at some point but that’s really out of my control. I’m trying not to stress about it. We’re having a very small wedding so I think it’ll be nice for others who aren’t there to see some photos right away.
I’ve seen some “unplugged” signs at weddings I’ve been to, but that just is for the actual ceremony.
Post # 13
I completely understand where you’re coming from. Even when I take pictures with others, I usually ask to see the photo to determine if it should be retaken or not before sharing. I’m a very private person & only post photos every blue moon. Everyone knows how I am. Fiance doesn’t have any form of social media. My social media accounts are private, I have my timeline set to limited past view, and I have to approve tagged posts before they’re allowed on my timeline. I had someone on fb to share my entire family album on their pg that has nothing to do with them; some of my relatives were harassed and stalked and I had an inbox full of crazy mess from strangers. I had to correct the person who shared it and apologize to my family smh it was horrible and she showed no remorse. Fiance and I are now deciding on whether to still invite to the wedding or not.
Post # 15
EllyAnne: I loved the fact that they did actually, some of my guests captured moments that my photographer didn’t (like a picture of my dad and my husbands grandfather shaking hands and smiling for example, not a pic we requested but def one I love!)