(Closed) we’re not in a rush, but bottom line ladies-I cant conceive:/ pls be sensitive

posted 6 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
183 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Do you know if you’ve been having sex when you are ovulating?  Timing in your cycle is really important in trying to get pregnant.  

Also I’m not a doctor but I don’t think having an abortion should affect your ability to get pregnant.  

Post # 4
1715 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Im sorry your having these issue and lots good vibes to send your way ok. Because your husband had a kid 10 years ago does not meen he isnt the cause first of. There can be so many different issues with this and I am not the expert with anything relating to previous abortions or charting or anything like that which Im sure other ladies can give you better advice. A little bit of backround on me. When I was 12 my mother went through fertility issues while trying to have her second child and I have many people around me who have gone through every treatment in the book to try and conceive (some succesful). Do you have any reasons that this may be difficult, examples are weight and excercise (lacking or too much) or age or anything like this?

Post # 5
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m confused about your part involving STD’s and abortion. You chose an abortion or your baby miscarried? or you think you haven’t gotten STD’s because you had an abortion?

I think your best bet would be to consult a fertility specialist and get some things looked into. As the other ladies mentioned , are you charting yoru temps and using the sticks to see if your even ovulating? It could be a whole list of simple thigns or something more grand.

Also just because your husband has a kid, doesn’t mean that he is in the clear as far as fertility and sperm health/motility is concerned! Both factors need to be checked!

Best of luck and try to  stay positive!

Post # 7
1508 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I would say that you need to see your OB/GYN and be honest about your prior medical history.  You could have any number of issues from the most minor of bad timing to ovulation disorders, blocked tubes, ENDO OR PCOS. Also your hubby could have developed sperm issues in the ten  since he fathered his child.

Your doctor will probably do a physical exam and prehaps bloodwork. If your serious about TTC you will propably be referred to a Reproductive Endocrinologist who would do Bloodwork, ultrasound and usually an HSG.

Post # 9
1660 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@punkin83: Do you know whether or not you are ovulating (based on charting and/or ovulation predictor kits)? If you haven’t already read it, I found the book Take Charge of Your Fertility to be very informative. So much I didn’t know before reading that book! I believe that it is rare for abortion to affect fertility, but it can happen. Sometimes the D&C procedure can scar the uterus (same thing with someone has a D&C post miscarriage). They can do a procedure where they use a little camera to check things out and can usually remove scarring if necessary. I would go see your doctor to get checked out for basic things…I can see how it would be scary, but avoiding the issue might be causing you to worry needlessly. I’m sorry you are going through this.  

ETA: Sorry, x-posted!

Also wanted to add that even if you have a 28-day cycle, you aren’t necessary ovulating on day 14. You could ovulate earlier or later… you can even have regular cycles even if you aren’t actually ovulating. What are your periods like? Heavy, light? Long, short? Also, both you and your SO were able to get pregant/get someone pregnant in the past… I don’t think it’s any more likely that the issue is with you than with him…

Post # 10
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

@punkin83:  I would think abortion would have nothing to do with your tubes.  Only an ectopic pregnancy or another issue like endometriosis would.  Many people have completely unexplained infertility.

Your first step is to get CD3 bloodwork and an HSG (the test that checks your tubes) and a Semen Analysis for your husband.  Your regular OB can order all of these.

After that, you might try meds and/or IUI.

There are many of us on here dealing with infertility.  Don’t depair!  There are many avenues to try and answers to find.

Post # 11
2142 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

So sorry you are having issues. *hugs*

My first questions would be a)just because you have a “regular” 28 day cycle does not mean you are ovulating at the same time every month b) when you say you have been “trying” for almost 2 years what do you mean? Has he been ejaculating in you for almost 2 years all the time and/or around the time you “think” you are ovulating?

Lastly I have to agree with the other ladies that just because he has a ten year old daughter does not mean the fertility issue may not lie with him. Or that’ he’s not playing a part in it.

Post # 12
6473 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011 - Sydney, Australia

I would imagine if you saw a specialist, one of the first things they would do would be a HyCoSy or a saline test to make sure your tubes aren’t blocked. They’d also re-check hubby’s semen, because things can change.

If you DO have issues with tubes, there are fertility treatments that can be used.

Post # 13
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@punkin83:  I also have had an abortion and I have succesfully concieved, I am currently 10 weeks. For the most part abortion should not effect your future fertility.

You should go see your OBGYN and not jump to conclusions about your tubes. It could be a matter of getting on clomid or something similiar. Just because your Darling Husband has a daughter does not mean his sperm count is the same. You should see your OBGYN and go from there but don’t freak yourself out with google because it will just add more stress to the situation. Good luck and I hope a BFP is in your near future. Just Please go see your doc.

Post # 14
2226 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m sorry you are having troubles.  But, like other posters have said, don’t jump to a worst possible scenario just yet.  Even under the most ideal situation, there’s still only a 30% chance you’ll get pregnant each month.  Your best option is to go see your GYN and have them do some testing.  It could just be as simple as not having sex at the right time.  Good luck!

Post # 15
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

Don’t jump to conclusions. Unless you’re really tracking everything and making sure you’re bd’ing around ovulation, you can’t really be sure. On another note your Fiance having a child previously doesn’t mean that something hasn’t gone wrong since. You can’t really speculate the reasons because there could be tons of them. I would see a doctor in order to get a correct diagnosis.

Post # 16
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012


Maybe your timing is a bit off? My cousin is a birth doula and swears by this book by Toni Weschler called “Taking Charge of Your Fertility”. It talks about all sorts of things especially that you’re only really able to conceive for a few short days every month. On my first read I found it at the local library. Check it out. It can only help.

Best of luck!

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