(Closed) Were you ever required to wear specific bridesmaid shoes with a LONG dress

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 31
Member
2731 posts
Sugar bee

My girls wore long dusty pink dresses and I wanted them in gold shoes…so I bought it for them.

I asked each girl what style she felt comfortable in and some of them chose flats while the others preferred heels.

 

Post # 32
Member
473 posts
Helper bee

I think this is totally reasonable, but then again I think that the bride and groom should pay for everything that is any more specified that “wear whatever you want”. 

 

The American tradition of the BMs paying for their own clothes is really strange to me.

Post # 33
Member
921 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Um nope guess my friends are not bridezillas.

All my friend asked was a certain it could have been a heel, a flat, open closed whatever.

My girls are wearing long dresses and I am saying they can wear whatever they want.. they all have good fashion sense not too worried about this.

Post # 34
Member
1202 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

I actually chose floor length dresses for the purpose that my Bridesmaid or Best Man could wear any shoes they want! One less thing to worry about.

Post # 35
Member
1897 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

View original reply
Starfish55 :  Nope. My BM’s were thrilled when I said “whatever silver shoe you want, and I recommend flats (outdoor ceremony)” I think thats the courteous thing to do, but I am sure it is not the norm.

Post # 36
Member
8998 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
Starfish55 :  never – and every time I’ve been a bridemaid we had a short dress. I was given a color and that’s it. One time I was told wedges or flats because the ceremony was on grass, but even style hasn’t been specified otherwise. I’ve needed silver, nude, and yellow shoes all of which I still wear regularly. 

Post # 37
Member
28 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2017

I was in a wedding once where the bride wanted us to wear nude patent-leather peep-toe pumps.  One bridesmaid and I both owned the same pair of nude patent-leather CLOSED-toe pumps.  She had us buy the peep-toe ones… 

Post # 38
Member
3232 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I would never wear a specific shoe regardless of dress length, unless I just happened to love the shoe. But forcing myself to pay to be uncomfortable all night?? Nope. 

My BMs wore short navy dresses of their choosing with a nude shoe of their choosing. Some had heels, some had wedges, one had flats. They all looked lovely. 

Post # 39
Member
11506 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I asked all of my bridesmaids to wear a silver sandal for my wedding. It could be any silver sandal, but it had to have some sort of a heel (even a half inch kitten heel) and not be slap against the foot while someone was walking. They all had or purchased their own different shoes within those guidelines. In hindsight, I wouldn’t even care if the sandal were flat, as long as it wasn’t a flip-flop (because of the noise.)

I was not a fan of the times when I’ve had to wear a specific shoe that that the bride chose, because, if shoes do not fit properly, the person wearing them will get blisters. And not everyone can wear the same shoe style.

Post # 40
Member
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I originally picked a dress that showed their feet (very slightly high low, barely ankle height) and asked them to wear the same pair of $45 block heels, but I bought the shoes for them. I recently changed my mind and they’re now getting floor length dresses, and I told them to wear whatever they want. But they all asked if they could wear the same shoes anyways.

Post # 41
Member
1147 posts
Bumble bee

Yes, but the whole outfit was bought for us.

Post # 42
Member
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Yes, every wedding I was in had a request. Mostly reasonable ones though. 🙂

First time. Short dress, very expensive shoes that I never once wore again in a green color to match (but I get it because the dress was short, so I was okay with this). 

Long dress, any gold shoes. I bought a $25 pair I could re-wear.

Long dress, any nude shoes. I bought a $25 pair I have reworn dozens of times. (Lucky purchase on that one!)

Most recently. Long dress, any satin shoe, dyed the wedding color. Was annoyed at first (prior post) but when all was said and done I got the shoes for under $30. No ones ended up matching exactly or even close, but no harm done as I got them inexpensively and that’s all I cared about. (However, they ended up going in the garbage because they were painful and would never wear plum again – even though a nice color, but I have no need!)

My own wedding. Long dresses. Asked for them to wear any nude shoe. Honestly, I still feel badly even asking them to bother because I didn’t notice for one second what any of them were wearing and they certainly didn’t show. That’s hindsight for you.

So future brides w/long dresses, you most likely won’t even notice!

Post # 43
Member
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

View original reply
Starfish55 :  I went off an a tangent of memories of my own experiences, and didn’t even address your specific issue. I would be annoyed in your case, because wearing specific shoes isn’t necessary and that’s expensive. You wouldn’t re-wear a specfic shoe again and no one will see it anyway. Agreed!

Post # 44
Member
699 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2019

Yes, multiple times. Shoes were horrid, and were brought to the Salvation army the next day. 

Post # 45
Member
487 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Nope.  Nothing screams ‘wedding’ like matching bleeding feet.  

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