Were you still surprised when you expected a proposal at some point?

posted 3 months ago in Engagement
Post # 16
122 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2020 - City, State

Still waiting for my semi-surprise proposal, I know it’ll be before our holiday in late April but nothing else apart from that! I would say that the vast majority of women I know (obviously including myself) expected their proposal after discussing a marriage timeline with their partners.

It definitely doesn’t ruin the proposal and still leaves plenty of scope for surprise, but this way you know you’re on the same page and you don’t either have to make a snap decision when he proposes as a complete surprise, or keep indefinitely waiting for a proposal that might not even happen. It’s a win-win if you ask me.

Post # 17
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2020 - Orlando, FL

We have been together 7 years this past October and got engaged on Christmas. We started talking about rings and getting engaged months before he actually proposed and I knew he had the ring so I had a heads up the proposal was coming. On Christmas Day we were taking a day trip just the two of us and I had a feeling it would be the day! Once we got to our destination he was acting really anxious and by that point I knew it would be coming! Even so I still bawled my eyes out and it was perfect. I don’t think knowing it was going to made it any less special at all! 

Post # 18
22 posts


mel2 :  I had the same experience, I helped him design the ring, signed for it when it arrived and when he mentioned he wanted to take me to a super fancy restaurant a few weeks later, I knew it was coming. It doesn’t change that it was an amazing, super beautiful, super exciting moment for us; it just wasn’t a totally out of left field surprise.

Post # 19
452 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

We went ring shopping together, so I knew a proposal was coming soon. My family and I were expecting it to be on my birthday in September, since he had bought a sapphire engagement ring and the date would have been ideal.

In early August, we went away to one of his favourite childhood haunts-a small rustic resort where he had spent his summers growing up. We were on a hiking trail, and we stopped to look over at the lake. That’s when he popped the question. I was so surprised I laugh-cried through the whole thing. It was perfect and lovely. So yes, I was expecting a proposal, but it still was a completely enjoyable surprise. 🙂 

Post # 21
1301 posts
Bumble bee

I too think the whole surprise thing is overrated.  I mean, you’re two consenting adults, rigth?  Assuming marriage has been discussed, no one should be truly surprised with a proposal.

That said, for some guys (and girls), having the element of surprise is a big deal.  My husband wanted to surprise me, and did throw me off when he proposed the day he did, as in I wasn’t expecting him to propose that day.  I knew a proposal was coming as I told him what kind of ring I wanted, but I didn’t know he had ordered it.  I didn’t look at every special date or event as “OMG – this could be it!” because I think you set yourself up for disappointment when you do that.  A PP said it best – I too was overcome with emotion, but not completely surprised.  It was still very special even though I knew it was coming.

Post # 22
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: London, UK

No, it wasn’t a surprise and I didn’t want a surprise.

Post # 23
9178 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

Yup. He proposed on a camping trip and invited a friend along that he knew would say no to throw me off. I actually joked earlier in the day that he should have brought the ring with him because it would be a perfect weekend to propose. I didn’t realize he had it in his bag! 

Post # 24
3067 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2021

Mlim :  I was surprised with the timing of when he did it. He was in the middle of changing jobs and life was so up in the air that I kind of put my desire for engagement on the back burner for a bit, figuring it was more important to settle into our new work and financial structure. So I was very caught off guard when he proposed to me two weeks before he was beginning the new job! 

Had he proposed the summer before I would not have been surprised because I had been expecting it then. 

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