Western son marrying Tamil Indian woman. Many questions!!!

posted 1 year ago in Intercultural
Post # 2
Member
75 posts
Worker bee

I would sit down and talk to her and her family on what they expect from you. I’m sure they are understanding of the fact that this is all new for you and will be willing to help. As for the wedding saree, I would let your future daughter in law pick it out or at least go with her as the wedding saree is traditionally made from a specific high quality silk. Also ask if they plan on doing their wedding shopping in India as this is very common in the Indian community. 

*I am South Indian but not Tamil so I can’t speak for what the traditions are for them. Good luck and I’m sure she and her family will be happy to answer all your questions! 

Post # 3
Member
4560 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

You need to talk with your son and future daughter in law about this. They will have a wedding plan I am sure and you can take part in it, she can explain some customs if they’re going to incorporate them, etc. Speaking with them is most important, and getting feedback from her parents as well through her.

Post # 4
Member
268 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

Hi there. I’m not South Indian, but I am an Indian woman marrying a Jewish American man very soon so I understand what you mean, because we’re currently going through the very same process. While my family isn’t very traditional at all, my FH and his parents started reading up on Indian weddings and getting anxious as well. The best way to approach this is to have a long chat with your son and FDIL. They should be able to tell you what aspects of her Indian traditions they wish to incorporate and what their expectations are. If they want you to present her with a saree I’m sure they’ll let you know. I’m certain they don’t expect you to just know what to do! 

Post # 5
Member
268 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

P.S. regarding purchasing a sari, I agree with PP. Buy it in India with the help of you FDIL.

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