Post # 1
Soooo, some of you have read my previous posts about my family (mom and sister are super close even though sister is selfish and just uses mom yadda yadda) but I need to figure this out.
My mom and sister seemed excited when I got my ring. Then they were disappointed that we were waiting so long. We moved it up to next year, they still seem disappointed. It has gotten to the point where if I say anything about the wedding my mom flps! Last night I was trying to discuss venue. This is a really sore subject for me because mom keeps telling me that I need a venue, but she SAID she wants to pay for some of the wedding but she won’t sit down and talk about budget with me and Fiance. How am I supposed to pick a venue if I don’t know my budget?!?!?! I digress, I mentioned maybe getting married in FI’s Dad’s (awesome) backyard. The convo wasn’t heated or anything but she JUST HUNG UP ON ME!!!! I haven’t spoken to her since.
Today I tried to talk to sister, but she ignored me even as I cried. I don’t understand why they are being so cold.
As of right now, I am just going to plan the wedding by myself. If my mom wants to know something, she can just ask. I am tired of crying and feeling worthless because my own mother doesn’t care about my wedding. I’m really really considering eloping right now….
Post # 3
I think the only thing you are doing wrong is letting them walk all over you. Plan the wedding you and your Fiance want and can afford on your own. If they ask details share, but don’t ask for help or opinions. This kind of family drama will take the joy out of planning if you let it. In your other posts you mention other family who is more supportive. Turn to them if you need a second opinion, and try to enjoy the process as much as you can.
Post # 4
I think you should plan as if you’re not recieving any money from them. If you want to elope, do it. Your mother sounds like the type of person who would say “if you want that, I’m not paying for it”.
Post # 5
@impatientlypatient: This is your wedding (you and your FI). You shouldn’t be struggling with your mom or sister and they should be there for you. Plan your wedding for you two and if they want something to do with it they can just ask, you shouldn’t be putting up with their attitude if their being that rude, and if they don’t tell you why they’re mad and rude how are you suppose to know? Think about yourself, do things for yourself and be as maerry as you can.
Post # 6
@impatientlypatient: I’m getting ignored too, because the family things its too far away. Im still planning on my own, they are old fashioned and don’t understand venues and vendors are booked a year in advance. Take it easy, they will come around.
Post # 7
miss IP I feel ya. My mom constantly mocks my decisions but gets irate if I decide anything without her imput. It hurts. It hurts ALOT when the people (supposedly) closest to you don’t care about your emotional well being on such an important day. But I will say this – NO ONE will be as excited about your wedding day as you and your Fiance so if someone out there is making you regret you own freakin wedding then you need to write them off regardless of their relation to you.
But yeah. We all have the dream of excited family members that embrace you and Fiance and are genuinely excited/happy but sadly, that aint always the case.
The previous posters got it right. You really gotta just concentrate on what you want and if need be be prepared to pay for the whole thing without them