(Closed) What are the first 3 things you should do(or did) for your wedding?

posted 10 years ago in Paper
  • poll: The first thing I did for my wedding was...

    Buy my dress!

    Pick a venue!

    Save money!

    Make a guest list!

  • Post # 17
    Member
    5842 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2011

    View original reply
    @Miss Sardine: haha it really isn’t though. The number in my head was “reasonable” and then at the first venue we went to they asked us what we were looking to spend and I turned to my mom with an expectant look and she was like “um why are you looking at me?”. A budget isn’t just a number, its also knowing who will be contributing and what strings come attached to the money.

    Post # 18
    Member
    1105 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    We knew where we were going to have the wedding, we knew the date, and I knew I wasn’t going to spend over $5000 so my first 3 are gonna be different:

    1. Reception venue

    2. Theme and colors

    3. Bridal Party

     

    But you should definately know your budget and then go from there. 

    I knew that I was going to DIY with a lot of our wedding, so I started picking up decorations the end of October while everything was on clearance and that saved us a lot of money.  I think the only thing that wasn’t at least 50% off was my dress and the reception venue and food.  Good luck

    Post # 19
    Member
    3866 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    There’s a wedding planner on here somewhere you can ask, too… Not sure where her post got to…

    Anywhos, Here’s my suggestion:

    1) Budget.  

    2) Vision

    3) Guest List (can be swapped with #2)

    4) Venue

     

    From there you can choose colors, flowers, etc.  I suggest finding a good check list you like and using it as a basis.  Just remember that you have to know how much you CAN spend, before you can figure out where you can have the wedding, how many you can invite, etc.  

    It’s like if you’re buying a car, you gotta know what you can spend before you can buy.  You might like the newest model covertable, but if you only have a budget for a little sedan, it’s not going to happen (unless you manage to pull off a miracle, lol in which case, I want details!!!).  

    Good luck!!! And congrats!!!

    Post # 20
    Member
    2203 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    We started by looking at venues to understand what the costs were in our area/ what our options were- hotels, museums, etc…just tried to get a feel for the endless wedding options out there…

    bought a TON of wedding magazines 🙂 as I had never really looked at wedding stuff before the boy popped the question

    Looking at venues helped us shaped our budget and then we started to pull together a general guest (wait…how many cousins do we actually have??) and that helped narrow down our search a bit.

    By this time, we had a general idea of what we wanted the day to be like and picked a venue!

    Just have fun and enjoy yourself 🙂

    Post # 21
    Member
    3977 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I think it depends on what you want. Everybody knows certain things about their wedding even before they start planning. Someone who ends up with 500 people at their wedding rarely starts out thinking there will only be 40 there. Someone with a 30k budget rarely starts off hoping to get it all done with 3k. Everyone has a ballpark.

    1. So I think that’s the first thing: Find your ballpark, your vision for size and money before you have specific numbers. What is an absolute must? A church? Dancing until midnight? Hydrangeas? If the beach is a must, 300 people probably is going to be hard to swing. If a formal sit down dinner is a must, then 2k most likely ain’t gonna do it. You gotta find your balance first. Preliminary #’s for budget and guests are good here.

    2. Next really is the budget though. You can’t go looking at venues when you’re not sure whether you have $2,000 or $5,000 to spend, or any amounts that vary by more than a thousand bucks. You gotta have the tough talk with Fiance and parents, grandparents, or anyone else who may or may not be contributing.

    3. I think venue is the next big thing. Most venues don’t have extremely specific min-max #’s so as long as you’re looking at places that are in your ballpark you don’t have to have the precise number of guests before you book a venue. Based on your ballpark you should know whether you’ll have 80 people or 140 people even without listing every name.

    This might be a little stickier when you get up into the really large weddings. If your parents are paying a lot and are expecting to invite over 100 people not even counting FI’s side or your friends, then that’s something that should be discussed during vision–but again, it’s likely something you’ll have some clue of before since you know your family.

    4. The guest list is a struggle, not gonna lie. Everyone has a different idea about how far into your extended family and acquaintances you should go, but really I think under the “majors” it’s the last thing that really needs to be nailed down in stone, every name decided.

    Post # 22
    Member
    5654 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2011

    We went with a cheap as possible Budget and I’ve kept to that so it’s worked.

    1. Guestlist…. this will confirm your “budget” range and tell you what size venue to get

    2. Type of Wedding…. Theme/Colors/Formality/Time of Day

    3. Any projects you will DIY… want to know what you’re looking at for investing time

    I waited for my vendors…. Infact we just book our caterer for our April Wedding In January (right before the local Wedding Expo <— dates always fill up there) It’s a very reputable company here and she said she was having brides book for February when we went in. lol

    Post # 23
    Member
    5571 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I agree that it is definitely Budget, Guest List, Venue. After you know those things you can pick a date based on your/the venue’s availability and the other things fall together after!

    Post # 24
    Member
    735 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    1. Save money…been doing that since the summer (before I was engaged, but I wish I had started sooner!)

    2. Guest list (just started tweaking more and more, we knew it was going to be on the smaller end of things.

    3. Pick a venue ( I researched several venues, but I knew way back which one I wanted because of sentimental reasons)

    4. On to looking for a dress now.

    Post # 25
    Member
    780 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    THE VERY FIRST THING YOU SHOULD DO IS GET A BINDER AND DIVIDERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nothing fancy, mine was just laying around the house. 

    1. Decide on a BUDGET

    2. Decide on the TYPE/STYLE wedding you want.  I’ve seen elegant pictures of both backyard casual affairs as well as ballroom gala type weddings.

    3.  Set a DATE.  The first question every venue, vendor, salon, etc.  will ask you each and every time you email, visit, phone them will be what’s your wedding date!!!  LOL.

    I know you said 3 things, but booking the VENUE is the very next thing you should do.  They book up FAST!!!

    Congrats on your engagement and happy planning!!! 

    Post # 26
    Member
    610 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    1. Booked Venue

    2. Booked Caterer

    3. Booked Photographer

    Those were my 3 main concerns that seemed most important to have. Everything else fell into place.

    Post # 27
    Member
    31 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    1)  Budget

    2)  Type/style of wedding (colors/themes, more casual vs. more elegant/traditional, small and intimate or not, etc.)

    3)  Guest list (which would depend on your budget and the type of wedding you decide on.

    I actually didn’t follow my own list.. haha… I did #1 and #2 and then got carried away looking at venues.  I  booked a venue, caterer, photographer and other vendors before finalizing our guest list.  We had a magic number in our heads (150) and after putting down everyone on paper, realized we were looking at around 175-200.  Not too bad and not too far from our original number, but it would’ve saved us a lot of going back and forth in terms of what we could afford vs. what we could not if we had finalized the guest list earlier.

    Post # 28
    Member
    2828 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    1) Decided on a budget & guest list

    2) Venue

    3) Officiant

    4) Photographer

    5) Attire.

    other things have been interspersed  between these things (like looking at invitation designs and other diy stuff).

    Post # 29
    Member
    143 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    View original reply
    @Miss Sardine: That’s what my budget is right now!  I’m just getting started, but we have made a (super-tentative) guest list & started looking into possible dates for the ceremony and places that look either awesome or not our style.

    Post # 30
    Member
    4753 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Dress

    Photographer

    Venue

    (Guestlist was already sort of started, and the budget was previously mentioned and therefore expected)

    Post # 31
    Member
    518 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    1) figure out the budget

    2) figure out the level of formality and size of the wedding you want (number of guests)

    3) book a venue

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