(Closed) What are you NOT having for your wedding.

posted 8 years ago in Traditions
Post # 32
94 posts
Worker bee

We are:

-Not having a bridal party (only exception is FI’s daughter, I wanted her included)

-No traditional officiant, my bestie got ordained for the occasion

-No mother/son, father/daughter dance, just too awkward

-No cutting the cake moment (cupcakes only, no feeding each other)

-No garter/bouquet toss

-No wedding favors, this will cause chaos in my family. We’re Italian, and those damn almonds have haunted me from childhood, I despise them.

-Probably no ceremony music

-No veil

-No heels, I’m 5’7″ so I’m decorating my own flats so I don’t have to special order a longer dress (seriously wedding designers? I am not that tall)

-No cocktail hour

I have to admit, this is an encore wedding for both of us. I learned and am not telling most people of the exclusions because I don’t want to listen to it. I have very traditional family, and they won’t like it one bit, but they’ll deal the day of.

We strangely are probably doing a seating plan because most people coming don’t know eachother at all, and I don’t want my old co-workers mixing with my aunts and tormenting them with awkward conversation.


One piece of advice I can offer,  I skipped the recieving line at my first wedding. We thought we could quickly go around table to table to say hello. This took my entire reception and was a horrific chore (there was about 100 people last time). I am absolutely having a recieving line to hurry people up so that way they can’t talk my ear off with 20 people in line behind them(we’re only having 40 this time). If you are having a small ceremony, and no one would be offended if they don’t get face time, don’t do the line. If Uncle Bob will get pissy you didn’t specifically say hello to him (and you care), or if you are having a large wedding and feel obligated to speak to everyone, then do the line, spend your reception having fun instead of saying hello.

Post # 33
10452 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I highly doubt we will do a receiving line, and no personalized vows for sure. 

Post # 34
11482 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

We did not have a receiving line or a garter toss, and we did not have alcohol, except for a choice of champagne or sparkling cider for the toast.  We also did not have any type of sparklers/bubbles/rice etc.  (And the only dances Darling Husband and I had time to dance were our first dance, our last dance, and our dances with our respective opposite-sex parents.)

Post # 35
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

No kids and no recieving line


Post # 36
341 posts
Helper bee

No veil

Not having a religious ceremony

No wedding march

No rice, bubbles, sparklers, flower petals, etc

No receiving line

No glass clinking/bell ringing for a kiss

No cake

No readings at ceremony

No ringbearer (2 flower girls tho, neither are related to us)

Still working on no garter toss/bouquet toss


Post # 37
211 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

bridal party

chairs during the ceremony

most of our family and friends in attendance.

flower centerpieces and other floral arrangements (bouquet and bout only)

tossing of any objects

catering (IF I can get away with it)

cake cutting (we want blue velvet cup cakes)

Music during my ceremony or reception (ipods or otherwise are OK)

No family dances

No officiant (my Pops is gonna marry us, he’s ordained)

No fancy shoes…Cobalt Blue Frye boots


Truth is, we want 30 or less people, this is about us. Once upon a time, I did this before (wrong guy, though)…and it stopped being about us and started being about who needed to be impressed. This time it’s on my dime, and under my rules. Spread over 4 days. We want it to feel like Thanksgiving or Christmas with immediate family, warm, happy, everybody cooking together…although we will probably need help from our venue with the whole roasted pig part!



Post # 38
1056 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

WOW, I’m amazed at how many people aren’t having a Garter/Boquet toss or, receiving line. 


So we’re not having:

– NO Kids unless in wedding party.

– potentially no garter/Boquet toss myself if we don’t have single people at the wedding. LOL

– Not your traditionaly guest book (doing a photo guest book)

– No streamers/bubbles (can’t afford it)

– no traditional favors (doing candy bar)


-Groom not having a bachelor party (b/c he doesn’t want one). 

Post # 39
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Where to start…

  • No gerter/boquet toss
  • No real flowers
  • No heels
  • No makeup
  • No reception party (just dinner)
  • Best and and Maid of Honor only
  • No ringbearer or flower girl
  • No DJ
  • Cash bar
  • Seriously considering axing favors… I DO have a great idea for cheap AND practical favors, though 😛
  • No designer dress (DressilyMe)
  • No Save-the-Dates, no physical RSVPs
  • Considering no dancing, as well… there definitely won’t be any special dances, but I won’t stop guests from geting up and getting down!

Now, who gives their guests washcloths, soap, and/or mints as a favor?? That just seems wrong….

Post # 40
1512 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013


receiving line

father/daughter or mother/son dance


anything religious

first look

vows we wrote ourselves

Post # 41
893 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Mz Izzie:  No garter toss and money dance.

Post # 42
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Also, I’m thinking about nixing the sand ceremony, as well… I thought the weding was “unity” enough!


Post # 43
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Flowers. I’m not paying over 2k for things that will die in about 7 hours. 

Post # 44
363 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

  • No bridal party, with the exception of my FIs daughter
  • No traditional music for the ceremony
  • No unity candle
  • No bouquet/garter toss
  • No parents dances
  • No clinking glasses for kisses
  • No cash bar
  • No dances like the electric slide, chicken dance, or YMCA
  • No slideshow of us growing up
  • No cake in the face during the cake cutting


I also want to cut the receiving line, but we might end up doing it for the sake of convenience, and because it’s the one thing my mom has asked for.  I’m also on the fence about doing toasts.  If we decide to have them, I want to keep them as short and sweet as possible. 🙂  

Post # 45
2067 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011


  • Alcohol
  • Garter Toss – But we are doing the bouquet toss
  • Dollar Dance
  • Receiving Line
  • First Look
  • Heels (for me or BMs)
  • Bubbles/rice/sparklers/etc… Thought about it, but it just didn’t fit in with our day
  • Reception dress – Although I am changing into a dress to leave, but most people probably won’t even see it
  • Tuxes
  • Menus
  • Unity Candle (but we are doing sand)
  • Real flowers in the decor (Bouquets/corsages/bouts from florist… all the rest are artificial – centerpieces, altar decor, pew decor, etc)

Post # 46
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

-no garter / bouqet toss

-no cake smooshing in the face

-no ring bearer

-no open bar (I’ve never ever been to a wedding that had one, but online they seem to be quite common)

-no dollar dance (again, I’ve only ever heard of this on the internet, not where I live)


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