(Closed) What are you requiring of your bridesmaids cost wise?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Total cost

    Under $100

    $100-200

    $201-300

    $301-400

    $401 +

  • Post # 76
    Member
    221 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2016

    I chose $100-200, but I realize it may be more than that after reading a few posts. 

    The only thing I am requiring them to buy is the dress, and I asked everyone’s budgets before picking out dresses. They all told me $200-250 for a dress. I picked a designer whose most expensive option is $140, but most are in the $120 range, and the designer offers custom sizing so minimal alterations should be needed (hopefully). They get to pick their own dresses as long as it is from that designer, floor length, red, and in chiffon (it’s a summer wedding so I didn’t want them to be in a heavy fabric). 

    They can wear whatever neutral colored shoes (but I left it open if they have a pair of pink or red shoes that they think will go), whatever jewelry they want, and do their hair and makeup however they feel comfortable doing it. So they could be paying more for these things, but it is up to them what they pay (or don’t pay). 

    Two bridesmaids live out of town, so they might also be paying for travel and a hotel room (and the two in town might want to stay at the hotel anyways…they have for other local friends’s weddings so they didn’t have to drive). But again, this is their choice and expenses that they would probably incur if they were only guests as well. 

    The only other things are my shower and bachelorette, which are in the very early planning phases, but all seem to want to help and contribute (all of them have asked me about it; I only talk about those things when asked, so I don’t know much about it). I emphasized to all of them that neither of these events need to be fancy or expensive, and I don’t want anyone to feel that they have to spend a certain amount. I want them to choose what they want to contribute. So I honestly have no idea for cost here. 

    Post # 77
    Member
    253 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    View original reply
    gatsbymermaid:  We are pretty much similar.

    Dress: 175

    Shall (a requirement of the church): 20

    Shoes: as long as their nude: lets estimate 25 since they don’t need to be fancy

    Hair and makeup: optional if they want to get it done or do it themselves

    Nails: either nude or french tips which if they do nude they can do it themselves

    Jewlry: I’m getting them a Swarovski necklace on a silver chain with a pearl and small swarovski crystal

    so I would say around $220, not expecting a bachelorette party, but expecting gifts at the wedding because it’s just a custom within my family to give a gift even if you incure a cost of being in the wedding party, I would do it for them even if I wasn’t in the best financial situation or kindly decline the offer.

     

    • This reply was modified 6 years, 3 months ago by mrsczup478.
    Post # 78
    Member
    59 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2016

    My wedding is basically a destination weekend wedding, 4-5 hour drive for most.

     

    Dresses – 140

    Shoes – can wear whatever they want (asking they be silver or black)

    Jewelry – Anything silver

    Lodging – 125 per night for 2 bdrm cabin (they will be sharing cabins with another bridal party member) so 125.00 in total for the weekend

    Hair & makep – I am covering that completely

    Post # 79
    Member
    482 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: Rocky Mountains-May 2017

    View original reply
    gatsbymermaid:  I’m basically letting them pic their dresses as long as they’re the same color, material, and either have a matching top or length and even that I might not care about. They can choose to either do their own or pay someone to do their hair/nails. And as long as their shoes are the same color I don’t care about style really. 

    So how much they spend is really dependent on them. I’m not planning on really demanding anything of them. 

    They’ll also be responsible for paying their way if we do any trip thing. I mean if anything is $200 or less for all of us, then I’d pay it, but yea

    Post # 80
    Member
    303 posts
    Helper bee

    I’ve tried to keep the costs as low as possible for my girls:

    • Dress – any navy cocktail length dress.  I found an option at Target (they sell bridesmaid dresses, online only) for $70 if they didn’t feel like searching on their own, so I’d guess anywhere between $50 and $250, but it’s their choice.  I’m buying the flower girl’s dress as both of her parents are in the wedding party.
    • Shoes – I just said nude wedges or dressy sandals/flats (I don’t actually care if they wear heels, but everything is outside in the grass so I figured they’d want something more comfortable and easier to deal with)
    • Jewelry – whatever they want
    • Hair – don’t care – gave them the option of having it done by the same girl who is doing mine and most chose to do that, but it was not a requirement of mine (she charges $45-75 depending on the complexity of the style)
    • Makeup – also said I don’t care and most also chose to have it done professionally (she charges $85 for airbrush with lashes)
    • mani/pedi – don’t care 
    • Hotel – wedding is Out of Town for 90% of guests so they’d be traveling no matter what, but they do have one extra day of hotel for the rehearsal/RD so somewhere between $135-$200 (but my Maid/Matron of Honor is staying with her aunt who lives in the same town and I offered my house for anyone who didn’t want to get a room – all but the Maid/Matron of Honor chose to stay at the bed & breakfast where the wedding and reception will be held)
    • Travel costs – I think they are all driving – it is between a 2.5-6 hour drive for them, but again, they’d all be doing that anyway
    • Bridal shower – they are throwing two showers – one Bridesmaid or Best Man cohosted with my stepmother in the town where my family lives and then I think three other BM’s are cohosting a shower at FI’s mom’s house in the state I live in.  No idea what the costs are for either of them, but I don’t think they are terribly high.
    • Bachelorette party – this one is pretty expensive, but it was voted on by everyone and all said yes – we are going on a five day trip to Key West.  I’ll be covering my own expenses.  Five of my six bridesmaids plus six other friends are coming and we’ve rented a huge house that we’ll all be sharing.  A couple of people are flying down, but most are carpooling.  The house will be just over $400 per person and then each person will cover meals/drinks/etc for themselves.  Some have already said they intend to cover some of my costs, but I’ll try to pay for all of my stuff myself.  And the house has two full kitchens so I’m sure we’ll cook some meals there instead of eating out.
    Post # 81
    Member
    124 posts
    Blushing bee

    I’m not exactly sure what they’ll be paying:

    Dress – Originally I told them to purchase any dress they wanted as long as it was dark purple. Heck, if they already owned a dress they could wear it again. Then my maid of honor mentioned she might like wearing blue better (our wedding colors are purple and blue) and I said she was welcome to wear blue if that would be preferable. The other bridesmaid said blue might be easier for them to find and so she jumped on that idea. So I guess they’re wearing blue now!

    Shoes, jewelry, hair, and makeup are all up to them as far as what they want to wear or do. I’m not having my hair or makeup professionally done, so we’ll probably help each other. 

    They’re co-hosting a shower and I’ve told them multiple times not to go crazy. 

    The bachelorette will be horseback riding and then going out to dinner. I’ve sent them Groupons we could potentially take advantage of to help make it more cost effective. 

    Their gifts are all items that I would buy them for their birthdays. 

    The venue is close enough that hotel accommodations won’t be needed. A bridge toll and gas will be about the only expenses for travel.

    I feel bad that I only have two girls in my bridal party, as it does make the shower more expensive to host, but they turned down my repeated offers to help pay for the shower or to provide food or other things. 

    Hopefully it has been a good experience for them thus far. I’ve been in two weddings and they were both awful, so I’ve been trying very hard to make this a positive experience for them.

    Post # 82
    Member
    2059 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    all my girls had to buy was their dresses (bridesmaid dresses were $139, maid of honor’s dress was $129) and their boleros ($17.99 at target).

    they all already had shoes that worked, hair/makeup was optional, and i didn’t care about jewelry.

    one of my bridesmaids did have to travel about 2.5 hours, but she didn’t have to get a hotel room, she just stayed with her parents.

    i didn’t have a bachelorette party.

    my maid of honor, her mom, and my mom threw my shower (even though, the invitation said it was thrown by all the bridesmaids). the only thing the other 2 girls did was buy a couple of giftcards to use for prizes. 

    Post # 83
    Member
    2366 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    View original reply
    gatsbymermaid: 

    Watters bridesmaid dresses with alterations about 425. Any silver shoe was acceptable. Only makeup requirement was smokey eye, most maids did own hair and makeup. If they wanted to polish nails had to be a neutral pink. 

    My sister graciously threw my bachelorette and shower, so as far as I know no expense for them. 

    Post # 85
    Member
    492 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2015 - Fairmont Banff Springs Hotel

    I am guessing each will spend about $400 for my wedding because they will need to pay for a hotel room for the extra night of the rehearsal (wedding is just out of the city), they each chipped in for my bridal shower or bachelorette party (maybe $100 each max) and I asked them to wear a navy evening gown for their bridesmaid attire. I guessed $200 for the dress but it could range from buying a $600 dress (my little sister, who will also wear it to her grad dinner) to $0 if they already have one/borrow, etc.

    I am not asking for any specific accessories, shoes or makeup or hair to be professionally done.

    When I write it out, $400 is a lot! But I really don’t feel like I’m asking that much of them. That’s crazy!

    Post # 86
    Member
    782 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    Dress-$200

    Spiltting the hotel room- $60

    Hair-$60

    Shoes- whatever they want

    If they want to get their nails done with me I will give them the option to join me

     

    Post # 87
    Member
    2704 posts
    Sugar bee

    Dresses – They can wear whatever they want, including anything they already own. There has been talk of buying dresses though (as they are excited about the chance to glam up).

    Shoes – Anything. I don’t mind. They both have plenty haha.

    Jewelry – Whatever metals suit them. I don’t mind at all. I’ll be commissioning them a headpiece by a designer we all love as a surprise. It’s for the wedding so not technically a gift (we don’t really do gifts where we are anyways).

    Lodging – I’m paying night before. They will be paying night of the wedding. Probs $200 ea I guess.

    Hair & makep – I’m paying.

    We don’t do showers where I am and I don’t want a bachelorette. If they plan something it will just be a night out with both my girl and guy friends and there could be costs involved, like eveyone splitting a hotel room, I guess.

    Post # 88
    Member
    146 posts
    Blushing bee

    Dress: $120 – I don’t think anyone needed alterations.

    Shoes: I gave them 2 colors and just asked they all wear the same color (3 girls total). Maid/Matron of Honor bought her shoes first, so they all went with that color. 1 wore shoes from her closet so $0 and I don’t know what the others cost.

    Jewelry: $0 – I had it handmade and gifted it to them.

    Nails: Whatever they wanted. We’re all adults, I trusted them to do something classy.

    Hair & Makeup: $80 – I had professionals come to do mine while getting ready, and they had the option of doing their own or having her do theirs. 2 chose to pay for the stylist, 1 did everything herself, everyone looked beautiful.

    Shower: My Maid/Matron of Honor paid for everything and the other two were to give her their halves, but only 1 did. I would guess maybe $200 each for the 2 girls?

    Bachelorette: Again, a bridesmaid flaked out so it was split between 2. For the hotel, dinner/drinks, and activities it probably totaled maybe $300 for my moh and maybe $200 for my Bridesmaid or Best Man.

    The girls did go in on a shower gift for me, so that maybe added another $50 to each. All in all, I’d say: $200 for the Bridesmaid or Best Man who flaked; $700 for BM#2, and maybe $800-850 for my moh?

    Wow, that’s insane and yet seems cheap compared to what I’ve seen on the Bee. I’m so glad I went overbudget on their bridesmaid gifts, they certainly deserved it!

    Post # 89
    Member
    2268 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    I’m trying to keep mine as cheap as possible. All they have to get is dress, shoes and hair/makeup. Dresses are either $120 or $160 (two different styles). They can pick any silver shoe they want and can either get hair done with me (at a hair school) go another place, or do their own.

     

    I am paying for two dresses. My aunt graciously stepped in as my Maid/Matron of Honor (after a falling out with my previous) so I am paying for her’s and my cousins ( my BM). She’s a single mom of three kids, and its her birthday this money so making this her present!

    Post # 90
    Member
    519 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    I offered to pay for their dresses, but neither of them were having any of it. So instead of starting a fight with my best friend and my sister, I backed off and let them order them all on their own… I did wait for free shipping and a coupon to be out before poking them about it, though. 🙂

    My sister is flying in and staying in a hotel, but she’d have to do that even if she was just a guest, so I’m not sure if it should be factored into the cost or not, but it’s around $250. She’s renting a two-bedroom condo with her in-laws who are also invited, but I’m not sure how many days they’re staying yet.

    I’m paying for their hair and makeup, they’re wearing shoes they already have, and I’m making their jewelry. If we only count the dress, it’s around $130. If we include the hotel and such it’d be around $350 I guess?

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