What are your current life struggles?

posted 3 years ago in Wellness
Post # 16
Member
3245 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I’m seriously ill, can’t work, stuck in a wheelchair most of the time. No energy for a social life, desperately isolated, unable to do anything independent of Darling Husband and horribly broke. GAH. So everything. 

Post # 17
Member
533 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

All financial. Both Fiance and have money tied up in property we can’t release at the moment which is tough. We’re struggling to save for our wedding and his car is slowly dying. I know in about 5 years things will get easier so try to focus on that. 

Post # 18
Member
1307 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I’m currently struggling on day 5 of the flu, I am miserable. 

Post # 19
Member
1686 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Fiance and i have had a pretty tough last 12 months.  

Spent thousands fixing up my mums house so she could sell and move with the verbal agreement that she pay us back when the house is sold.   House is not getting sold now and what money? Is her response.  

That is just a small part of financial strain.  We are struggling to pay back thousands of dollars worth of debt between us due to juvenile decisions when we were younger.

Being evicted from our home for having a dog – even though our dog was on the application.  Saving to move.

All our friends are starting to buy houses and/or have families (most have help from parents) we feel so far behind.

I failed uni this semester due to unexpected things coming up   struggling with focusing on uni and a demanding job.

Ive been gaining weight slowly but steadily, probably just my metabolism changing as i get.older as i havent changed any habits, but frustrating.

Just gotta keep smiling though, our dream is to tell our children about these hard times, and for them to not believe it.

Post # 20
Member
72 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

about to start a new semester of grad school that i know is going to be tough as F**k. But I love my course, and if that’s my biggest problem I know I’m doing well. 

Post # 21
Member
587 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

I really appreciate this thread because it’s so true that many of us have struggles that aren’t often recognized. And even the simple knowlege that some anonymous person might read and sympathize, even for a moment, lightens the burdens considerably when you feel as alone in this world as I do. My current life situtation is that I’m drowning in financial debts. I’ve also been waiting over a year to get engaged/married, with increasing amounts of pressure from family/close friends. My boyfriend and I are in at a point where we ARE ready to marry, but it all boils down to the fact that we simply can’t afford it. We even took the leap, going against everything I’ve ever learned and believed in, by moving in together in the hopes of saving some money. So far it’s been about three and a half months though with very little difference. Not only that, but we have a new business as of last year, which hasn’t brought in much of anything (simply because it is so new) but it’s as the saying goes, ‘it takes money to make money.’ I’m just really tired of living in this limbo land, and hiding this double life (very few people know that we live together) The logical thought of many would simply be, ‘well now, why don’t you just get a part time job for some side money?’ In all realities, that would be the best thing to do at this point, but I have intense anxiety issues that prevent me from holding down a “traditional job” for any amount of time. Boyfriend has his hands full with business-related responsibilities. Recently we discovered the new company called SwanLuv (look it up) that gave an extraordinary amount of hope, but that turned out to be a big joke, as I liteally just found out, and now my hope has been utterly crumbled, and somehow, the burdens now seem to be even heavier to bear…

Post # 22
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

I have a chronic illness, which may be related to multiple sclerosis which I may or may not have (I keep putting off going to the neurologist or telling my doctor about new symptoms because I just cannot deal with it – so really this is a problem of my own making).

I have weight to lose, but I’m on medication that makes me ravenous all the time, so it’s hard. 

One of my dogs has long term special needs, the other is recovering from a back injury and requires about as much care as a newborn right now.

I am about to start my honours year, which will lead to starting a doctorate next year, in a field where there are no jobs outside of academia (where I am unlikely to ever get a permanent full time job… which might be impossible anyway if I do have MS).

I think I want to have a baby after we get married, but my Future Mother-In-Law is crazy and it will be a constant fight every step of the way just for the right to raise my own child as I see fit. I seriously don’t know whether I have the stamina for that (FMIL, not the actual raising of said child) and whether it would be a better option to just not have kids (which makes me sad every day that she is so over the top that she could actually take something like that away from me).

But, I will sound like a Polyanna – everything else is going so well right now. This time in my life is the happiest and most settled that things have been in a long time. I can deal with these things, because there is so much more good, and so much to look forward to.

Post # 23
Member
950 posts
Busy bee

My main hurdles at the moment are me having way too much work, and my husband not having enough 😀 My husband was made redundant last autumn and my work has increased exponentially since the end of last summer. I tend to be so exhausted after work that I’m finding it hard to find the time or energy to do the things outside of work I would like to do and which I need to do to help keep me sane.

My parents are going through some health issues at the moment as well, but compared to the stuff that went on last year, they’re pretty minor even though they are causing them problems right now. My mum’s wrist will hopefully heal just fine (she broke it about 3 weeks ago) and my dad’s pain will hopefully be better under control once he gets through this transition period between his old and new treatment regimes.

Post # 24
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: South Lodge. 2nd of Dec 2017

I am really lucky right now we are all happy and health, so hugs to all the bees who aren’t so fortunate.  Right now though I am a little glum, we brought a house August 2014 beautiful Art Deco detached house, spent the last year saying to fiancé that our bedroom window looks pissed, well this winter we developed a large crack outside. So after two months of chatting to builders, double glazing provider and eventually a structal surveyor, yesterday we found the problem when the previous owner had the large bay window put in they, missed the supports and our whole bay is sitting on the window ledge…… So we now have three props in our bedroom and three in the lounge to help spread the load, also a 15 foot hole across the ceiling and 5 foot holes under the window arrrrggg, hoping to be able to crank up the bay and strap it back, take out all the interior from window down to first floor level and rebuild, but we have been told to expect the worst, which is removing the front of the house from the first floor up and rebuilding, if it collapses during the process, that just sounds expensive hey !!  It’s not traditional to sue in England but trust me legal proceedings are inevitable….. Ugh

Post # 25
Member
1513 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Holly Hedge Estate

We are having a very hard time trying to save to buy a house. No sure how people come up with 20% cash downpayment :-/ . Work has been incredibly stressful and difficul the last 6 months and I am looking to transition to another territory. There are health issues going on with me that could hinder holding a pregnancy but it’s a crapshoot and we won’t know until I am pregnant.

Everyone has their stuff!

Post # 26
Member
1310 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I have a job. I hardly can pay the bills. I’m about to take maternity leave seven weeks unpaid. Nothing. So I worry about providing for my family, plus keeping the lights on. My husband is disabled, he does what he can which is a tremendous help. I never thought we would be struggling so much. Thanks for letting me bitch

Post # 27
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Finances.  I lost my job in December.  So I’m hopping around doing temp and contract work.  And I’m getting married very soon.  Mum has helped us a lot with this wedding and I can’t wait to find something stable to pay her back.  I’ll find something soon.

 

Post # 28
Member
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

ugh. Right now there is a lot. Transitions at work, school is rough, finances/taxes/retirement issues, constant health issues and anxiety due to that. Need to really lose weight and start to exercise. Feels like I have no time between full-time job, part-time job, trainings for work, homework at night. Tons of dr appointments and when I’m not following up with them, I’m calling them disputing bills since name change and insurance change.

I have no idea how people then take care of kids. Maybe I do not multi-task well but I couldn’t even imagine, kid sick, bath time, homework, etc… Moms amaze me. 

But, that being said, I always am grateful- it could always be worse. 

 

Post # 29
Member
227 posts
Helper bee

My wisdom teeth were extracted about a week ago and they are healing pretty slow…I guess because I’m “old” for extraction (I’m 28) and they were really REALLY impacted. Oh, and I got a sore on the side of the cheek and tongue where I can actually chew. Bummer 🙁 I feel better every day though and this is literally the worst thing happening in my life right now, so I can’t complain too much!

Post # 30
Member
929 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I had to leave social media because I got tired of seeing how “perfect” life is for everyone else. I know they just don’t post about their struggles and they must have them, but I just couldn’t take constantly seeing everyone else enjoy all of the things I’m unable to do: have children, travel, work, etc. It’s not that I can’t be happy for others, but most of these people are acquaintances at best. At least for right now, I’m sticking with saving that emotional energy for my close friends and family!

My struggle is a chronic illness that is painful and debilitating. I’m unable to work and the medication I take causes birth defects, so Darling Husband and I have decided not to have children. We could adopt, but frankly Darling Husband feels enough pressure being the sole breadwinner and caretaker to his wife, and I don’t blame him for not wanting to take on additional responsibility. I just wish that if we weren’t able to have children that we could at least travel together and enjoy all the extra money we’re supposed to have since we’re not raising kids, but my illness prevents travel and bring unable to work means no money! 

It’s such a breath of fresh air to see people being honest about the good and bad in their lives. It reminds me that we’re all human and no one’s life is perfect. I wish all of you the very best and hope that your troubles ease. Thank you for being willing to share them with us. <3

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