(Closed) What are your thoughts on extreme feminism?

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
  • poll: What do you think about extreme feminism?

    It's a little silly/ no longer neccacary.

    Fine with it as long as other opinions are not forced on me.

    It's a good thing!!

    I feel very strongly about this topic and voice my opinion frequently!

  • Post # 107
    Member
    983 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    Just something about the pay gap that I think is important. White men make the most, white women make more than both men and women of color and men of color make more than women of color. This is an example of how I, as a women am being oppressed though I still have white privilege and benefit from our racist society. Oppression is intersectional and we have to be aware of that. 

    Post # 108
    Member
    7976 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

    Still stalking this thread… you know what… I have one more thing to say. It SUCKS that, in our society, it’s always the woman’s fault.

    – If she has sex, she’s a whore. If she doesn’t, she’s a frigid man hater.

    – If she gets pregnant, she’s a slut who should know better. The man gets off scott free. If she has the baby, she’s a tramp who is looking to manipulate the system and get a free council house. If she has an abortion, she’s a murdering slut.

    – If she makes herself pretty, she can’t object when men follow her home, cat call her, or even attack and rape her. But if she wears men’s clothes or doesn’t shave her legs then she’s lazy, sloppy, pathetic, and probably a lesbian.

    – If she has children then she has either ensnared a man to pay for them with her wiles, or else she has manipulated the system to support them. Because the man always spends his money on his wife’s silly whims, right? But if she doesn’t want children, she’s selfish and wants to put her career first.

    – Same point above, but for women who return to work after having children (selfish) or who stay at home looking after them (freeloaders).

    … when can it be the man’s fault for once, please? We can’t flippin’ well win.

    Post # 109
    Member
    983 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

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    @Rachel631:  Have you read Jessica Valenti’s “He’s a Stud, She’s a Slut”? I think you should look into it. It’s a collection of 50 double standards and her commentary about them. She’s funny and makes good points. 

    Post # 110
    Member
    7976 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

    View original reply
    @Jellybones:  Ha! I should do. The other thing I find sad is that some of the progress we have made as a society has made things equally bad for everyone, not equally good for everyone. I think it comes down to what sells…

    Advertiser: I know how we could make lots of money! We can encourage women to embrace their sexuality so that we can sell more stuff! Just think… chippendales tickets, sexy undies, porn…

    Result: Men still objectify women, and now women objectify men as well. Just look at usual hen party dares… it’s somehow OK to pinch random men’s arses? And this isn’t sexual assault/ objectification…  how exactly?

    Unless I fancy living in a cave and eating my meat raw, I can’t escape this. And I admit that I contribute to it, as well. I have a whole drawer dedicated to my sexy undies. It’s as if we just can’t help ourselves/ I can’t help myself… sad. But I do think that one of the jobs of feminism is to point out issues like this. It’s not enough to say “well, women have more choices now” because there’s more to society and social change than that.

    And I think it’s a huge mistake to blame these negative changes on feminism, as some anti-feminists do… they’re nothing to do with feminism, and everything to do with consumerism!

    Post # 111
    Member
    1001 posts
    Bumble bee

    If anyone ever addresses me as “Mrs-My-Husband’s-First-Name-Our-Last-Name,” they’re be getting a goddamn earful.   And then some.  I’m fine with “Mrs-Lastname.”  That’s cool.  That’s an appropriate title.  But the other one?  I’m not okay with that.  You don’t ever hear men called “Mr-Wife’s-First-Name-Their-Shared-Lastname.”  So why should the reverse be appropriate?  Oh, right.  Because it harkens back to a time when women were considered barely more than property (and in some places, WERE considered property), had no rights, and could not own their own land.

    I call myself a feminist – sometimes a “militant feminist” or a “harcore feminist” – when describing myself to others, but I’ve only started doing that in recent years, and it’s not really what I consider myself.  I consider myself an equalist, and have since I was a child.  But no one knows what that term means, nd I end up giving this lengthy explanation that ends with the listener (if they actually know anything about feminism, rather than just buying into anti-feminist propaganda) saying, “So…you’re a feminist?”  So I just use the more commonly accepted term.

    Sexism hurts men AND women.  Feminism isn’t just about trying to “get more for women.”  Feminism is about trying to make sure that everyone has an equal playing field, regardless of sex, sexual orientation, and gender. 

    Feminism is about making sure that the most fit parent is awarded custody of children in custody disputes – regardless of whether the most fit parent is the mother or the father, and regardless of their sexual orientations or gender identities.  Because the idea that women are automatically better caregivers for children is sexist, and is part of the patriarchy.  And the idea that individuals of non-hetero or non-cis sexual orientation make poor caregivers is sexist, and also part of the patriarchy.

    Feminism is about making sure that female customers are not provided with additional service by male workers – above and beyond the requirements of the workers’ jobs – while male customers are deprived of those services.  Because the end result of this form of sexism – which is called “benevolent sexism,” by the way – is that the male customers are deprived of equal service because the female customers are being perceived as being weaker and in need of more assistance.  I work in the service industry, and this is something I have repeatedly seen my male coworkers doing.  When I see it, I call them out on it, and I explain why it’s a problem.  And once I explain it, they tend to change their behavior.  Because they’re not bad people, they just exist in a system that has told them they must be “gentlemanly” – but only to women.

    Many sexist acts hang their hat on terms like those – “gentleman,” “chivalrous,” “treating the lady properly.” For a better explanation, read this article, which talks about benevolent sexism and how it impacts both men and women.  Things like this are why I am a feminist, and why I will be one up until the moment I die.

     

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