(Closed) What changes with marriage?

posted 6 years ago in Married Life
  • poll: Has marriaged changed for you?
    Yes, everything changes! : (10 votes)
    9 %
    Somethings have but nothing drastic. : (60 votes)
    54 %
    Subtly I am sure but I haven't notice. : (22 votes)
    20 %
    No, nothing has and I doubt anything will. : (20 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    6998 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    I don’t think marriage changed things for us. I think just growing up changed things. We were actually talking about this yesterday – we are getting ready to move into a new house and were talking about the other places each of us had lived and got to reminiscing about the apartment he was in when we met and started dating and I had said something along the lines of “those were the days”. I love our life now, its just more, laid back? which I enjoy…like we go to bed at 10:30 or 11 instead of staying up till all hours doing who knows what or just talking. We have friends over on the weekends for games and drinks instead of going to bars like we used to. Things have changed but I think its just growing. Marriage didn’t change us. If anything Marriage made things stronger and better!

    Post # 5
    Member
    6394 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    We weren’t living together before we got married, and I still don’t think things have changed drastically! For us, it’s just the same relationship, only in closer quarters. I’m guessing for you, it’ll be the same relationship, only with more paperwork :).

    Post # 7
    Member
    5479 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    For us, being married is pretty much exactly like being engaged.  Aside from taxes, insurance, and being legally bound, of course.  But within our relationship, as far as how we feel and interact, nothing has changed.  I think it’s because we lived together for over 2 years before getting married.  I can see where moving in together when you get married could be overwhelming and really change your relationship (hopefully for the better!). 

     

    Post # 8
    Member
    8042 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2013

    I’m not married, but I think that sometimes people let themselves go when they get married. They figure that the relationship is safe so they stop doing those little things that made them attractive (not just physically) to each other in the beginning. Gaining weight, stopping shaving legs, burping, not going on dates… those sorts of things. I think doing some of this is natural – even in a long term relationship vs. marriage – but it’s also preventable. It’s good to be comfy w. each other, but it’s important to work on the relationship as well. Easier said than done.

    Post # 9
    Member
    2903 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    I think it depends on the couple.

     My ex husband and I were GREAT at dating and being engaged….we were together for 3 years before we got married. Then  EVERYTHING changed….2 years into it he got really depressed and had an affair…said he was not “good at being married”..

    My Darling Husband and I had fun dating and being engaged (almost 2 years) but we are alot happier married…so change can be good!Laughing

    Post # 10
    Member
    10453 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2014

    By the time our wedding comes we will have been together 8 years, living together for 2.5. I think we will be pretty much the same. 

    Edit: Not a change between us, but I’m pretty sure the instant the rings are on our fingers all of his aunts will be pushing for babies. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    8472 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2012

    We didn’t live together before we got married and nothing really has changed.  You have nothing to worry about. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    1238 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    the biggest difference for me was the feeling of commitment to one another. although we were commited before the wedding, of course, it FEELS more concrete now. I mean, we stood up in front of over 100 of our closest friends and family, and vowed our love to one another!

    even more than before I feel secure in our relationship and that if we hit rough patches, we’ll work it out. In my 20’s I was always “one foot out the door” in my relationships. now, I’m older, married, and want to make this marriage work. sometimes I’m overwhelmed with emotion when I think that this is it- the love of my life! likely, one of us will be widowed. it’s intense. but I cannot think of a better way to spend my life, with my beloved, until we are old. 🙂

    Post # 13
    Member
    1390 posts
    Bumble bee

    Um, we added him to my bank account, he wears a ring, we call each other husband and wife when doing introductions…..and that’s it. It’s fantastic. But it’s not really ‘different.’

    Post # 14
    Member
    75 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I have heard the same!  I have been with my fiance for 8 years, and we have been living together for 2 years now.  These 2 years have been CHALLENGING!  I honestly think that when people refer to marriage changing things, they are referring to this period of adjustment where you are merging your lives and ideas together and going through growing pains.  I think this is what the last 2 years were for me and my man… we merged financially, I relocated, had to reestablish my social life, merging ideas of life etc.  Now that we have gone through those adjustments, I think after we get married not much will really change for us.  

    I have talked to my married friends about this too, and everone seems to say the same!

    Post # 15
    Member
    10714 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Lol I’m still waiting to see if anything changes… nothing so far.

    Post # 16
    Member
    4419 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I don’t know exactly how to describe it, but everything changes. I think it changes because your attitude, outlook or perspective change. Suddenly, you start looking at things differently, and when your perspective changes, then that affects everything.

    I guess it’s a feeling inside.  Everything is the same, but yet it’s different. 

    The topic ‘What changes with marriage?’ is closed to new replies.

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