(Closed) what details do you share with the groom??

posted 10 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010 - Ocean View Villas/Jasmine Seafood Restaurant

Do you mean with your bridal look? or details about the wedding as well?  I didn’t discuss anything except shoes and veil with Mr HW.  I wanted to make sure he woldn’t miss the traditional veil since I wore a birdcage.  And the shoes I asked him if they were too dark.  These were also items he saw ahead of time, so i guess I kind of had to tell him.  I think he’ll be surprised no matter what though.  It’ll all look so different when it’s on you all together and you’ve got your hair and make up done.

Post # 4
10283 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

If I could take him with me dress shopping I would but the ladies in the family wont have that. I dont believe in the whole “the groom cant see the dress till the wedding” bologna. Not to mention, he would never remember what it looked like anyways. 

I did show him a few pics of me in some dresses that I tried on but thats been it so far. Honestly, he could care less what shoes I wear or how my hair looks. 

As far as the actual wedding planning, he’s been involved in everything. There are a few things that he doesn’t care about (like flowers) but for the most part everything else was decided on by both of us. It is his wedding too! People tend to forget that (like my mother)…

Post # 5
2154 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I bring up mostly everything, because I can never guess what he’ll care about. For instance: 

Flowers, he doesn’t give a crap. But flower petal aisle? He’s obsessed with it. Food? Not important. Venue? “Has to be really cool and memorable.” 

Post # 7
2828 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’ve mentioned a few things to him in passing, if I see a picture that catches my eye (either because I love it or hate it) and I’ll ask for my partner’s opinion.

I had to laugh though, when I was first looking at shoes I showed him a pair of bright red satin heels and asked ‘what do you think?’  his reply came across as dead serious “Aren’t you supposed to only wear white? I mean, they’re nice shoes, but for a wedding!? Wouldn’t that clash with the dress or something?”

I really really had to bite my tongue to keep myself from laughing.

I pretty well get his general opinion on most things look wise, I doubt he’ll remember specific details like I would, and like hotwings said, it’ll look completely different when everything is being worn together.


Post # 8
597 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I share enough for him to help me a little with his input:) I usually make most of the decision, but he adds to it…..for example, he wanted a circular cake with three layers(I did too) and he told me which flavor for cake he liked best…we used that. 

I usually get him to come with me/accompany me to talk to people/vendors/church…it boosts my confidence and I don’t feel so awkward……..like he came with me to talk to the church lady again about little details, so i could get my questions asked, he came with me to pick the bridesmaid dress color(pretty much what I liked), he came with me to the florist consultations, he came to the tastings, etc.

So I get small tid bits of his opinion, but he really doesn’t help at all. I keep a lot of the details to myself however because I don’t want stress him out, etc. talking to him about it all the time. ALthough now it seems it does get mentioned at least once a day now, because our wedding is so close(2 mths away) and things have to be accomplished/discussed each day. I am looking forward to him coming with me to talk to our ceremony musicians after mass this sunday:)

Post # 9
3315 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

At my first wedding, I took the groom dress shopping with me, so he knew all the details.  At my second wedding, I neglected to have a groom.  However, my bride and I shopped for our dresses together, so that we could get coordinating ones.

Post # 10
232 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I discuss almost everything except my dress. I still want him to be surprised when he sees me walking down the aisle.

Post # 11
5843 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

He’s seen my shoes and he has some pretty strong opinions about my earrings. The only things I won’t show him will be my veil/dress.

Post # 12
6571 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

I showed him my hair trial just b/c we went to dinner after and I wanted to keep it up to make sure it would last. Also, I told him that my dress was short and casual, just so he’d know what he and everyone else should be like.

For the most part, I kept things secret. I knew he wouldn’t really have an opinion about it anyway.

Post # 13
3219 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

FH knows everything, how else would I be able to try my dress on all the time 🙂 As soon as I tried on dresses I showed him all my favs and what ones I wanted to get!

Post # 14
1205 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Everything but the dress 🙂  He gets no such secrets; I have veto power on any strange tuxes he might find…Although he was the one who felt strongly about having a tux (versus a suit or other).  He’s funny!

Post # 15
713 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

View original reply
@2dBride: Neglected to have a groom… that’s funny!!

I’ve shown a picture of my dress to my Fiance. I’m getting a slightly different variation of the dress. And I know he won’t really remember what it looked like! I’ll be making a shawl for myself and most of my jewelery, so he’ll see those too.

Post # 16
2280 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I talk with him about virtually all the details, but not my dress or really anything about my wedding day look. For one thing, it’s none of his business and I’ll wear what I want thank you very much–and for another, I don’t think he cares all that much, haha.

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