(Closed) What did you do when your Bridesmaid said “No”?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

It happened with one of my girls too. I don’t feel toooo bad about it. I love her a bunch and know she loves me a whole bunch too, and I understood that she has a lot going on financially this year. Obviously I would have loved for her to be there strutting down the aisle with me, but she’ll be there anyways , taking pictures from the seats :D. I always thought that I’d hate putting any stress on my girls becuase I feel that if it would be me, I’d wish that the bride was considerate too. Good friends will always be good friends, and she’ll be sharing the same joy with you no matter where she sits or what she wears!!

My Fiance was actually very dissapointed and mad about the situation but I told him that we can’t control her actions, her financial situation, and obviously we can’t force her to be part of the Bridal Party. It was her decision and I back her up.

So, don’t worry about it too much. It’s not a reflection of how much she appreciates you as a friend but a reflection of her ability to handle financial stress ;).

How many BMs do you still have left?

Post # 4
Member
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@SM_DesignGirl: I actually respect her honesty. The only thing that you can do is A) either offer to assist with some of the financial burden or B) Move on…Harsh,but true.

Post # 5
Member
1920 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

It is sad when that happens. Maybe you can still include her in your wedding by doing a reading or something.

Post # 6
Member
1326 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Tre Bella, Mesa, AZ

I really like @merenguito‘s advice. Good friends are good friends no matter what. At least it’s a valid reason and she was upfront about it. Is there anyone else who could take her place?

Everyone is having a hard time financially in my family (except for my mom), so we’re actually paying for all our BP’s clothing since we want them all there and we can budget it in with what my mom has given us for the wedding. 🙂

Post # 7
Member
384 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I would be really bummed as well. But some BMs either dont care to spend the money or cant and dont tell you until its so close to the wedding. So on the bright side, at least you know now rather than much later and you can plan accordingly.

Post # 8
Member
2829 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Been there.

Most of my very closest friends are students, or living on a shoe-string budget, so while we’re doing all we can to make it easy on their pocket books for them, we can’t dictate their choices to them.

That being said, this happened to me as well, my close friend and previous Maid/Matron of Honor had to back out due to financial reasons, and is actually (as far as I am aware) not even coming to the wedding. Now while I may have had my feelings a little bruised with disappointment I completely understand.

There’s really not much you can do but keep on doing what you’re doing. *shrugs*

Post # 9
Member
5388 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

Welcome to weddingbee! There is not much you can do, but let her know that you understand. Two bridesmaids backed out by avoiding me which ruined my relationship with them.

Post # 10
Member
535 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@SM_DesignGirl: The same thing happened to me.  I have 5 bridesmaids and other than my sister, the one who means the most to me (my very best friend) had to step down.  She got engaged after I asked her to be a bridesmaid and now her wedding is 2 weeks after ours.  Financially, she said she can’t really handle it (since she and her Fiance are paying for their wedding themselves)…I offered to pay for her dress, but I don’t think she felt comfortable with it.  Her bridesmaids are her 3 sisters, so no hard feelings.  I still love her to death 🙂

The topic ‘What did you do when your Bridesmaid said “No”?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors